April Fool Jokes

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Funniest April Fool Jokes

I just ran over my dog. April fools! I don't know whose dog it was.

Girlfriend said "I think I'm pregnant, I'm two weeks late.. ..April fools!"

TIFU by delivering a punch line in the wrong place at the wrong time April Fools!

Funny April Fool Jokes

For April fools my girlfriend replaced my alphabits with Cheerios. I have no words to say how angry I am.

April Fools! girl: babe I'm pregnant you're the father

guy: can't fool me it's April's Fools Day!

girl: haha! got me! you're not the father

April Fools Day............ The day every newspaper tries to fool readers by sneaking in at least one properly researched, factually correct story.

I have a funny and original joke... April fools!

Easter this year is April Fools Day Just remember that so you don't fall for any crazy stories like people coming back from the dead.

Why is World Autism Day after April Fools’ Day? Because it takes longer for them to get the joke.

News Alert: Trump spending weekend working at the White House. April Fools

What do you call a female clown? April Fools

I told my mom she had epilepsy for April fool's day... She fell for it.

I hate all of you April fools I love you all

I just lost my virginity!!!! April fools *sob*

MOM! Dad hung himself in the attic. April fools! He hung himself in the basement.

Alright 2020, you’ve had your fun. Now say ‘April fools’ and let us get back to our lives, yeah?

Today my wife told me she's pregnant because of the mailman "Really?" I asked her.

​

"No, April Fools!" she replied, "I got an abortion".

And now for a completely, totally, 100% original joke that's never been seen on this subreddit before: April fools!

Happy Easter April Fools
Now go pay your rent.

Trump is President of the United States and Britain left the EU. APRIL FOOLS'!

Ah...wait...

This April fools, I decided to swipe right on only the ugly people on Tinder and then burn them. Still no matches.

What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes? Prankenstein!

I finally found a joke that isn't a repost! April Fools!

As an April fools joke, I told my SO that I was pregnant... ...sadly she didn't fall for it.

A man wake up from a coma and see that Trump is president... ... he says "Wow this is a really elaborate April fool's joke".

Oh my good and fellow Christians! It has been foretold our Lord and savior will once again rise from the dead and bless us all this Easter! April Fools!

Girlfriend to boyfriend GF - I'm sorry babe but i've cheated on you.

BF - I'm sorry aswell, I have also cheated on you.

GF - April fools day!

BF - Mine was on 24th March

CNN Made a Joke Article for April Fools Just another day in the office.

April Fool's day has been cancelled due to coronavirus. Everything you'll hear is true.

April fools in Latvia Latvian ask friend if he want potato for lunch. Friend guess is April Fool joke. Say "Too easy, never potato in Latvia, only sadness." One man starve to death during lunch.

I've got really slow reaction times April fools!

Parents should wake their kids up early tomorrow and tell them to get ready for school because coronavirus was canceled April Fool's

What was the key ingredient in the meth kingpin's April Fool's joke? Pseudo feds.

What did the victims of a month-delayed April Fool's prank feel? Dismay.

So I met my girlfriend the other day april fools! i don't have a girlfriend hahaha haha ha....ha.......

In the spirit of Easter, I've hidden eggs around the appartment. In the spirit of April Fools, I'm not telling my roommates.

"mom, dad, I have something important to tell you: I'm straight" Parents: "You do realize we just assume you're straight until you tell us otherwise, yes?"

Child: "HA! Got you! April fools!"

Why isn't Blizzard doing an April Fools joke this year? Diablo Immortal was already announced at Blizzcon

We're sorry to announce that April fools has been postponed. Due to the recent coronavirus crisis, April fools has been postponed to May 1st, 2020.
Thanks for your cooperation.

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New April Fool Jokes

Tee Pee a House on, April Fool's, 2020 Wouldn’t today, April Fool’s Day, 2020, be the best time to TeePee someone’s house?

The neighborhood will clean it up in four minutes.

I hate you all April fools :)

I have an April fools joke going on with my landlord I am not paying rent this April 1st hehe, don't tell him

Guys, I have some terrific news... April Fools, lol

I just thought of the ultimate April Fool's Prank. Let me spell it out for you. I T O U T F O R Y O U

Today is the day many people will confess to their crushes And say it was an April fool's joke when they get rejected

This morning my wife walk's into the kitchen as I am fixing my morning coffee. Wife in a very excited tone: "Babe! Babe! I'm pregnant you're going to be a father!"

Me: "Ha! Can't fool me it's April Fools Day!"

Wife: "Haha, got me, you're not the father."

April Fools Day exists, YouTubers: This is my last video

Ah. Here again comes the April Fools' Day. Some men outside screaming horrendous things. They never grow up. Wait. It was the news on the TV.

My boyfriend said he wanted to break up on April Fool’s day It would have been funnier if he hadn’t been saying it for weeks now.

Everyone: *suffers three months of misery beginning with New Year’s Day* 2020(after March 31st): APRIL FOOLS!

I just visited this sub to see all the april fools jokes. Only to find out I'm one myself.

April Fool’s Day has been POSTPONED. I’ll tell you the new date tomorrow.

I think the Stimulus Package is a sick April Fools joke. It’s a Stimu-LIE!!!

A time traveller walks into a bar April fools ! Time travellers don't exist !

Man commits suicide on April fools We could say his life was a joke.



I'll see myself out...


I didn't make the joke, my friend told me the joke and told me to post it on here.

I think you can still April Fool someone when there is a referrence to April 1st. April Fools

Don't trust your Spotify discover weekly because it was updated on April fool's. Just sayin

[OC] I am pretty good at keeping up with which date it is April Fools!

What's the worst part about April Fools? Jokes without punchlines

I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF April Fool's!!!

Maybe tomorrow.

Your shoe is untied. April fools!

James Bond is going to be played by a woman As a woman, James Bond's name will be Fools, April Fools.

She has a good sense of humor. My girlfriend caught me cheating with another girl today and i shouted April fool . She just smiled and went into the kitchen to cook for us because she knows we will be hungry after we finish .

Nothing on this sub is a repost. April fools.

An April Fools joke April fools! No joke

I finally understand why the chicken crossed the road April fools!

What was the worst april fools day joke? Well logan paul was born in 1995.

They told me I was getting holiday pay for working Easter... ... When I finished my shift, my manager said 'April Fool's!'

Malcolm Turnbull plans to fix NBN over the next 5 years Starting on April Fools Day

Apple is a joke. Apple was founded on the first of April 1976, That, if you don't know, is April Fools day. I have been fooled all my life.

I decided to teach my cousins a lesson about Easter and April Fools today... So I sent them on an easter egg hunt but didn't hide any eggs

Today I saw a boy running with a ticket on his hand at railway station.. Next thing I remember he was lying on the ground and ticket says 9 3/4 Hogwarts.
He missed april fools day

I have a girlfriend. Today is the only day I can post this.


April fools. I’m happily married.

It’s April Fool’s Day You better watch out, you might actually hear a good joke today.

Of course Thomas was skeptical, why not? The first Easter was on April Fool's Day.

Remember this Easter "He is risen!" April Fools

After the operation, there was good news and bad news... "Give me the bad news first, doc."

"The surgery was a complete success, and you are expected to make a full recovery."

"Wait, then what's the good news?"

"It's April Fool's Day."

Why Do News Channels love April Fools Day? Because it's socially acceptable to do what they already do every day of the year.

I just thought of a great April fools joke If everyone posted original content all day. But it wouldn't last 5 minutes if we are realistic.

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Long April Fool Jokes

Little Jonny was 5 years old and born blind

Little Jonny was 5 years old and born blind. One evening as his mother puts him to bed she says to him, "Jonny, tomorrow is a very special day: if you pray extra hard tonight God will grant you the miracle of sight". Super excited, Jonny jumps back out of bed, clasps his hands together and begin to pray, as his mum leaves the room. Just as she is about to close the door Jonny asks, "mum, will God really give me my sight?". "Yes Jonny, but only if you pray extra hard". An hour or so later, the mum pops her head around the door and sees Jonny still praying, "Oh God. Please let me see. I want to see my mummy for the very first time. I am sure that she's the prettiest mummy in the whole wide world." A few more hours later the mother goes into Jonny's room and sees him slumped over the bed, hands still clasped together. She puts him to bed.

The following day the mother gets up early and rushes to her sons room where he's still sleeping. She covers his eyes with her hands and gently wakes him. Super excited Jonny says to his mum, "mummy move your hands, I want to see, I want to see".

"Are you ready Jonny?" The mum replies.

""Yes, yes mummy. Move your hands". So the mother removes her hands. Jonny blinks and opens his eyes. "Mummy, mummy, I still can't see. Oh, mummy does God hate me? Mummy I can't see".

Jonny's mum beams a great big smile and says "April fools".

Billy's mom comes home to see him crying...

Billy, what's wrong son?

Dad hanged himself in the attic! replied Billy, "eyes in tears".

The mother rushes to the attic in a panic, quickly followed by her son.

As she gets up to the attic she notices that nothing is there and little Billy started giggling...

HaHaHa! April fool's mommy!!!

He hanged himself in the basement!

There was this little 9 year old blind kid, and one day he said to his mom, "Mom, All I've ever wanted was to see."

His mom said, "Well son it's your lucky day, today is the last day of March, and if you pray your hardest,your prayers will be answered."

So the little boy goes to bed 2 hours early and starts praying himself to sleep.

He wakes up half way through the night and realises that the night isn't over, so he prays another hour before he falls asleep again.

He finally wakes up the next morning and yells, "Mom, Mom, get in here fast!"

His mom comes running in and says, "What is it son?"

The boy says, "Mom I did just what you said I prayed and prayed harder than anyone else ever has, but I woke up this morning and I'm still blind!"

And his mom says....... "I know, - April Fools!!"

The Darkest Joke I Know

A boy is blind from the day he is born, Never knowing his mothers face never knowing colors and never knowing anything except what he can feel, smell, hear, or touch.

One night the boy is in his bedroom when his mother comes in and sits down on the bed beside him, she says "Sweetie I have some very good news for you" Tonight is a very special night, for tomorrow is a very special day,

The mother explains to her son that if he gets down on his knees and prays to God as hard as he can and truly believes in what he is praying then in the morning when he wakes up for the first time he will finally be able to see!

The boy is immediately excited and instantly gets on his knees and prays to God as hard as he can, he prays and prays for hours as long as he can until his body can no longer take it and he falls fast asleep, the next morning the boy awakes and to his pure horror he lets out a terrifying scream, his mother quickly runs into the room to her son and says "Baby what's the matter!"

The boy cries "Mommy it didn't work!" I prayed as long and as hard as I possibly could but I still can't see, the boys mother approaches her son puts her arm around his shoulder and says

April Fools Dumbass!

Mum, father hanged himself!

A little boy runs to his mum crying: "Mum, Mum", he screams, "Father hanged himself!"
"Where is he hanging?", his mum asks.
"In the attic!", the boy says.
So the mum and her son go to the attic but nobody's there.
"But he isn't there", says the mum in relief.
Then her son says: "April Fool! He's hanging in the basement!"

A man visits a wise man and meets his three daughters...

He's staying for the night and each of the girls come to him in turn to offer their hospitality.

The first one tells him her name is June because she was born in June. She is well practiced in fortune telling and gives him advice on the future.

The second one tells him her name is August because she was born in August. She practices medicine and gives him a complete physical.

The third one tells him her name is Maple because she was born in the neighboring town. She tells him of a great treasure buried beneath the family stables.

After digging for an entire night, he returns empty-handed to the house covered in dirt and animal excrement. He complains to the wise man about Maple's deception.

The wise man replies "oh you must have met April. April fools."

Little Billy had been blind since birth...

...and one night his mom tells him "If you pray extra hard tonight God will allow you see in the morning."

So little Billy prayed his heart out before going to sleep that night. The next morning he opened his eyes and to his surprise he screamed out.
"Mommy I still can't see!"
"I know son, April fools."

There was once a little blind girl...

... and more then anything in the world she wanted to be able to see again. "Mummy Mummy!" she would say, "when will i be able to see again?"and her mother would reply "well my darling, there are doctors working at this very instant on a cream which will make your eyes all better again! And we can get this cream next week!"

The little girl was so excited, for the next week she hardly slept and she hardly ate. The day before they were to collect the cream her mother tried to calm her down but the girl was so excited!

"Think of all the things I will be able to see again Mummy! The birds in the trees! The clouds in the sky!"

"Yes my darling, but get your sleep tonight and tomorrow we shall get the marvellous cream!"

So the next day the girl and her mummy go up to town where the wonderful new cream is purchased. As soon as they are home the girl is almost screaming with delight. "Quick mummy, quick!! Put it on, put it on!!" So the mother starts rubbing the cream into the girls eyes, the girl wincing because of the stinging but the mummy soothes her, "Dont worry," she says, "be strong! And tomorrow you will be able to see again!" They wrap her little head tight in bandages and set her to bed.

The next day the girl is shouting for her mummy, not having slept a wink, "Quick!! Mummy quick!! Help me with my bandages!!!" Her mummy rushes in and together they frantically and gleefully take of the bandages. The little girl opens her eyes and blinks in the morning sun...
"But... but mummy... I still cant see..." she says. and the mother screams "APRIL FOOLS!!!!!!!"

Little Johnny was 5 years old and born blind.

Little Jonny was 5 years old and born blind. One evening as his mother puts him to bed she says to him, "Jonny, tomorrow is a very special day: if you pray extra hard tonight God will grant you the miracle of sight". Super excited, Jonny jumps back out of bed, clasps his hands together and begin to pray, as his mum leaves the room. Just as she is about to close the door Jonny asks, "mum, will God really give me my sight?". "Yes Jonny, but only if you pray extra hard". An hour or so later, the mum pops her head around the door and sees Jonny still praying, "Oh God. Please let me see. I want to see my mummy for the very first time. I am sure that she's the prettiest mummy in the whole wide world." A few more hours later the mother goes into Jonny's room and sees him slumped over the bed, hands still clasped together. She puts him to bed.

The following day the mother gets up early and rushes to her sons room where he's still sleeping. She covers his eyes with her hands and gently wakes him. Super excited Jonny says to his mum, "mummy move your hands, I want to see, I want to see".

"Are you ready Jonny?" The mum replies.

""Yes, yes mummy. Move your hands". So the mother removes her hands. Jonny blinks and opens his eyes. "Mummy, mummy, I still can't see. Oh, mummy does God hate me? Mummy I can't see".

Jonny's mum beams a great big smile and says "April fools".

Did you know the first Easter and ther first April Fools Day coincided as well?

The founder of both was a real trickster... He faked his own death!

(I feel like I should put a note here: this is not to mock religion... It's just a joke. If this offends you please get a sense of humor.)

Topical Jokes 4/5

Construction costs for the new Apple office complex are two billion dollars over budget. Luckily, Apple made *three* billion dollars while I was saying that sentence.

(Speaking of Apple) Apple plans to release a cheaper iPhone this year. And by “cheaper” they mean, “Cheaper than a MacBook.”

The FAA has said they are going to delay closure of 149 air traffic control stations. That’s the airport for you, everything gets delayed.

President Obama has urged politicians to join him in a 5% pay cut, but Joe Biden has refused. Biden explained that he can’t take a pay cut, because *he’s only making minimum wage*…

A book by the former editor of Vogue magazine reveals that supermodels will eat tissues to feel full. Which is great, because when the tissues come out later, they don’t have to wipe.

Today is International Topless Jihad Day. Many women wondered what a “Topless Jihad” was, men on the other hand, tuned out after hearing the word “topless.”

The CEO for social-game company Zynga, has agreed to a salary of just $1 dollar this year. Of course, that dollar will be put in an offshore account, so he can avoid paying taxes on it.

…Of course, no one can live on a dollar per year, so he’ll make extra money by going to gas stations and stealing from those “give-a-penny” dishes.

The White House has cut one billion dollars from the 2013 federal budget. They said they figured out how to save a billion after watching a marathon of TLC’s “Extreme Couponing.”

A judge has ruled that the morning-after pill can be sold to anyone, regardless of age. Newborns are warned against taking the pill, because they might evaporate.

A woman in Tennessee was arrested after an April Fool’s prank where she confessed to murdering her husband. That “prank” beat out her original idea of murdering her husband, then not confessing to it.

KFC has decided to start selling all-boneless chicken. They got the idea for removing the bones after seeing Kevin Ware break his leg.

President Obama is under fire for saying new Attorney General, Kamala Harris is “easily the best looking attorney general.” Obama backed down from the compliment and said that after giving it some thought she looks like quote, “Katt Williams in a dress.”

(Thanks for reading, and thanks for all the great encouragement!)

Series of Romanian Alinuta jokes.

Sup ya'll! I've translated some dark Romanian jokes about a girl named Alinuta. Any other Romanians who know more please share!

-Brother: Mom, Alinuta hung herself in the basement!
Mom goes and looks to find nothing.
Mom: She's not there.
Brother: April fools! She's in the attic!

-While Alinuta's brother is watching tv, she quickly moves passed the screen.
Brother: Hey! Get out of the way!
Alinuta again moves passed the screen, blocking her brothers view for a second.
Bother: Stop getting in the way!
Alinuta moves across the room again, blocking his screen.
Infuriated with his sister blocking his TV, Alinuta's brother calls their mom to resolve the problem.
Brother: I want to watch TV but Alinuta keeps moving in front of the screen.
Mom: oh it's cause she hung herself.

-"Alinuta stop playing with the scissors! You're going to spill your fingers on the floor again!"

April 1st Operation

(Doctor walks out of operation room. A man quickly reached the doctor.)

"How's my wife? How's my baby?"

"Well your wife is okay, but... Your baby... umm..."

(Man starts crying)

"APRIL FOOLS! HAHAHA! Jokes on you!" (laugh)

(Man starts laughing with the doctor.)

"The fact is your wife died as well."

Timmy's April Fool's joke

The day is April 1st, and Timmy wanted to play an April Fool's joke on his mom.
His mom comes home from work, and Timmy rushes to her.

"Mommy! Mommy!" He says, frantically.

"What is it, Timmy?" She asks.

"Dad hanged himself in the garage!"

The mom screams, then rushes to the garage, but nothing is there. She walks back in the house.

"Nothing is in the garage." She says to him.

"April fool's!"

"Oh than-"

"He hanged himself in the loft."

April fool!

While at work, right in a quite important meeting of some sort, Rick's mobile phone rings. Anxious because he knows what might be the reason behind this call, he answers the phone, only to jump up some seconds later, breathlessly take his coat and hat, squeaking some excuses to his smiling boss, hastily making for the exit of his office building. He finds a cab, jumps in and tells the driver to hit it, right to St. Helens Hospital, where his wife was delivering their first baby.
Arriving at the hospital, he runs to the front desk, gets his directions and jumps up the stairs to the maternity ward. Right as he is coming out of the stairwell, he sees a nurse coming out of the delivery room at the end of the corridor, with a tiny bundle in her arms.
As he is immediately sure this must be his baby, he starts beaming and swiftly walking towards the nurse. Noticing him, she also puts on a radiant smile and casually breaks one of the baby's tiny arms.
Rick stops mortified, not able to say anything, when the nurse again smiles her fantastic smile and starts twisting the small leg peeking out of the bundle. She continues to take the baby's head, acting as if she wanted to break the little's neck. Rick, coming back to his senses, starts running and screaming, only to see the nurse snap the thin neck while winking and smiling.
"Oh my god, what on earth are you doing to my baby?!", he screams in horror, ready to attack her, before she stops him with a contagious little laughter: "April fool!", she says, "It was already dead."

Billy's mom comes home to see him crying. "Billy, what's wrong?" "Dad hanged himself in the attic!" replied Billy, eyes in tears.

The mother rushes to the attic in a panic, quickly followed by her son.
As she gets up to the attic she notices that nothing is there, and little Billy started giggling. "HaHaHa! April fool's mommy!!! He hanged himself in the basement!"

In honor of the eve of April Fools Day... just remember that tomorrow you need to be cautious of many tweets and news reports because most of them will be lies and simply there to try and trick you. Believe nothing, and trust no one.

Just treat it like it's any other day.

​

Have fun!

A woman is giving birth to her child

And finally, after much effort and pain, the doctor manages to help deliver the baby. The Doctor then proceeds to chuck the baby out of the window.

W: "Why? Why did you do that to my poor baby, you monster?"

The Doctor laughs maniacally and replies "April Fool's! He was already dead."

A mother comes back home...

...and her son rushes to the door and tells her: "Mom, hurry up, dad has hanged himself in the bedroom!". The mother sprints to the bedroom but the room is all clear and there is no one there. The boy laughs and says "Haha April Fools! He hanged himself in the kitchen"

Dead Baby Jokes?

A mother who has just given birth waits expectantly for the nurse to return so she can hold her baby. A few minutes pass, and the nurse enters with the baby in her hands. The nurse then drops the baby on the ground, stomps on it's head and kicks it out of the window. The mother starts screaming 'My baby, my baby!!'
The nurse looks at the lady and says 'April Fools! He was already dead!'

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