Perverted Jokes

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Funniest Perverted Jokes

Funny Perverted Jokes

Every family has that weird, slightly perverted uncle. Not me, though! I just have some really hot nieces who won't let me buy them beer.

What is the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken.

What does a perverted frog say? Rub it, rub it

What does a perverted frog say ? Rubbit

What did the perverted frog say? Rubbit.



^^ehehehe

What does the perverted frog say? Rubbit.

Some people say it's sick & perverted to be a flasher... ...but I think it shows a lot of balls!

What did the perverted frog say? Rubbit

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky you use the feather. Perverted you use the whole chicken.

Difference between erotic and perverted You can be erotic by gently stroking your girlfriend with a feather. But its perverted if you take the whole goose to do it.

What did the perverted frog say? “Rubbit.”

Do you know the difference between erotic and perverted? An erotic person will use a feather on their partner.
A perverted person uses the whole chicken.

I realised how perverted and wrong touching someone's butt is, but it was when i slapped a statue... When i realised that i've hit rock bottom.

What does a perverted frog say? Rub it

Whats the difference between kinky and perverted ? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriends body with a feather. Perverted is when you use the whole chicken.

Did you hear about the perverted statistician? Standard deviation wasn't enough for him anymore...

What's the difference between kinky and perverted ? Kinky you use a feather; perverted you use the whole chicken !

Whats the difference between being kinky and perverted. When your kinky you mess with the feathers, but when your perverted you mess with the whole chicken.

What's the difference... What's the difference between a chef and a perverted aquarium owner?
One fixes dishes and the other dicks his fishes.

Had to chase away a perverted peeping tom from my neighbour's window today Nobody steps on my patch

I overheard an extremely perverted frog at the pond yesterday. Kept saying "rubbit"

What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is using a feather. Perverted is using the whole chicken.

What’s a perverted dentists favourite part of an appointment? The cavity search

What do you call a perverted magician? David Copafeel

What do perverted frogs say? "Rubbit"

Did you hear about the perverted statistician? Standard deviation wasn't enough for him.

What do you call a perverted alligator? A masturgator

What did the perverted sauce say to the Chinese Ribs? .. I'm only Peking.

What did the perverted frog say? Rub-it!

The Weiner There once was a Congressman named Weiner,

Who had a perverted demeanor.

He was forced from the Hill for acting like Bill.

Now Congress is one Weiner leaner.



Moral: tweet your meat, lose your seat.

What do you call a perverted Magician? Q: What do you call a perverted Magician?

A: David "Cop a Feel"

...ba dum cha!

Did you hear the one about the perverted statistician? He couldn't get off on the standard deviation

Fertility clinic What did the perverted embryonic scientist say to the microscope?

"Are those my genes because I can definitely see myself in them."

I have an idea for a story that revolves around a perverted celibate... He goes through life half cocked.

What is the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky you use a feather, perverted you use the whole chicken.

Why was the perverted math teacher arrested? He got caught trying to put 42 into 17.

What does a perverted cow do at night? Beef Jerkey

What are the most perverted animals in the barnyard? Brownchicken-browncow

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Long Perverted Jokes

Two rotten brothers

In a small town there were two wealthy brothers. Both of them were known to be pretty much rotten to the core. One day the elder brother passed away. At a chapel, the younger brother sought out a preacher. He inquired "listen, I know you know who me and my brother are, and we wouldn't be caught dead in this place. But, I will pay you a great sum of money to perform his funeral...on the condition that you must refer to my brother as a saint." So, the preacher mulls it over in his head for a while, but eventually accepts the offer.
At the funeral, the preacher stands before the packed crowd and eulogizes... "Ladies and Gentlemen, the man here is this box before you is a rotter! A licentious, perverted individual whose life ambition was to be purely devious at any cost..."
"BUT..." the preacher continues. "...compared to his younger brother, he was a saint."

After entering what appeared to be a whole new world I witnessed incredible things - a man-beast union composed of a human top and goat bottom, a queen who wore a gown made of icicles, a huge furry lion who ruled over it all.

Eventually though I decided to go home. I came out of the closet and told my parents of the adventures I'd had. They're very closed minded though - they said it was perverted and sent me to conversion therapy.

1920s, New York. An old lady on the bus overhears two Italian men talking...

To her horror, she hears the first man say:


"Emma come first. Den I come. Two asses, dey come together, and den I come again. Two asses, dey come again. Den I pee twice, and den I come again, and den it ends."


The lady starts hitting the man with her handbag, shouting:


"You pig, you swine! How dare you say such perverted filth in public!"


"Ey, relax, lady!" the Italian shouts. "I was just-a telling my friend-a here how to spell-a 'Mississippi'!"

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