A lion, a witch, and a wardrobe walk into a bar
The bartender asks what they're having.
The witch replies "Narnia business."
Did you hear about the witch that was casting spells and driving at the same time? She turned her car into a tree.
You thought Dad jokes were a thing? How about this Grandma joke: I woke up this morning to find a lion AND a witch in my wardrobe. When I asked them what they were doing, they shouted, "Narnia business!"
My wife asked me to pick the music for her mother's funeral. Apparently Ding-Dong! The Witch Is Dead was not the appropriate song.
My friend was grateful when I told her about the supernatural cure for the virus. I knew I made the right choice when I told her witch doctor to go to.
Did you hear about the witch that died while melting down armor? Her last words were: "I'm smeltinggg"
Oooooo Eeeeee Oooooo Ahhh Ahhh Ting Tang...
I was shocked when my adopted daughter told me she was going to marry a Witch Doctor.
“Why do you want to do that?” I asked.
“Pwobabwy for financial secuwity,” she replied.
People say the #MeToo movement is starting to resemble a witch hunt, but I don't think that's fair... For one thing, in a real witch hunt, the accused gets a trial first.
A man meets a witch.
A man goes to a witch and asks her to be liberated from an old spell.
>I can help you, I do however, need to know the exact same words of said spell
I remember, it was: *I now pronounce you, husband and wife.*
What do you call a witch who can't decide between casting good spells or bad spells? Trans-hex-ual
What does Daredevil and Scarlet Witch have in common? They both love red and lost their Vision
I asked the neighbourhood witch to help me assemble my new IKEA furniture, and we were done in record time. Turns out, she is a hexpert at this.
I called my elderly grandfather to check in on him
He told me that he wasn't doing so well, and the doctor said he didn't have much time left.
"Which doctor?" I asked
"No not a witch a doctor, a real doctor"
A driver ran over a man with a car
The man said: "Are you blind?!"
To witch the driver responded: "I didn't miss you, did I?"
All washed up
I was dating the wicked witch of the west. Things were going pretty good.
One day we got a little kinky and decided to take a bath together.
Relationship went straight down the drain.
My Mother-in-law told me she was going to a Witch and Wizard hunt in Manchester According to my wife, “where are you planning on hiding” wasn’t the correct response.
I travelled back to the 15th century the other day and saw a very attractive young witch Indeed, she was smoking hot.
A Emo and a leaf fall off a tree witch one hits the ground 1st? The leaf, A rope stops the Emo
A witch doctor can perform a dance to get rid of happy feelings of your enemies It's a good riddance
Me: "A beautiful witch was hitch-hiking...
so I stopped and picked her up"
Friend: "How do you know she was witch?"
Me: "Well she got in my car, put her hand on my leg and I turned into a motel"
Man: I would like to schedule a doctor’s appointment.
Receptionist: Alright, which doctor?
Man: Oh no, not the witch doctor he creeps me out. Just a regular doctor please.
How did the Wicked Witch of the West's wild and more voluptuous sister die? She entered a wet t-shirt contest.
[salem witch trials]
**judge:** You are guilty of doing magic! What do you have to say for yourself young lady?
**woman:** It's misdirection!
**judge:** Oh sorry! *miss* direction, do you have anything to say?
**woman:** *sigh* nevermind...
What if the ice bucket challenge Was just a long game to bring down the Wicked Witch of the West?
So, someone asked me if I was already wearing my Halloween mask. I said, "No, I just have resting witch face."
What did the Witch say when the Broom Salesman showed her a Vacuum? I don't want an automatic