4th Of July Jokes

Funny 4th Of July Jokes
Score: 2918

Every 4th of July, America sends Britain a locket with a little tiny picture of the United States in it. They want to remind the crown that America is still... (•_•)

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In *da* pendent

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I don’t see why Brits don’t celebrate the 4th of July. Surely 240 years of being officially separate from America is something to be happy about.

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I don't see why we Brits don't celebrate 4th of July Surely 240 years of being officially seperate from America is something to be happy about

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What’s the best drink to have on the 4th of July? A White Russian. Nothing is more American then a Russian helping you to make poor choices.

Score: 72

As a non-American, I love seeing Americans saying Happy 4th of July. It's the only time Americans pronounce dates correctly.

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Some people enjoy a day off on the 4th of July But not fire.

Fire works.

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Today in the UK we celebrate the 4th of July. The day the average IQ of the British Empire jumped 100 points with a single signature.

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This 4th of July please remember it's not "firecracker" This Independence Day, please remember it's not "firecracker," that term is very offensive to some people. It's "fire-caucasian." Thank you.

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Brits have more reason than most to celebrate 4th of July Surely 241 years of officially being separated from America is something to be happy about

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The 4th of July The only time of the year Americans say the day and month in the correct order.

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Where did the fire go on 4th of july? Firework

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Most people enjoy a day off on the 4th of July Except fire. Fire works on the 4th of July.

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What do they do for the 4th of July in England? Sulk.

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Brits have more reason than most to celebrate 4th of July Surely 242 years of officially being separated from America is something to be happy about

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4th of july British people say that we as Americans go overboard with the 4th of July.

When really the only thing that went overboard was their tea

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I put a picture of the USA in a heart locket to celebrate the 4th of July... Now it is truly independent

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Does England have a 4th of july? Yes they do, and a July 5th and a July 6th.

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Man, my neighbors are really into lighting off loads of 4th of July fireworks... It sounds lile a school outside.

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Last year I blew all my fingers off on the 4th of July And now my friends say they don't trust me. They say they can't count on me.

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Can confirm: England Does have a 4th of July And we even get it first!

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My dog hates the 4th of July Not because of the fireworks or anything, he's just going through a communist phase right now

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Amidst all of the distractions on this 4th of July, let’s not forget what we’re celebrating That the British blew a 13 colony lead

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Do you know why prisoners love the 4th of July? All the fresh meat on the 5th of July. Drive safe and party smart folks!

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On the 4th of July, almost everyone has a day off, except for fire. Fire works.

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Many veterans experience PTSD from the loud bangs of fireworks around holidays like 4th of July and New Years. My advice to them is to use noise-cancelling headphones, Netflix, and pharmaceutical-grade weed. Just like the children of Kabul.

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What do FBI agents grill for the 4th of July? Hillary.

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This 4th of July, remember: Alcohol and Fireworks do NOT mix Spilling even a little beer on a fuse can ruin fireworks.

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Merry 4th of July! The difference between Uncle Sam and Santa Claus is... Santa Claus gives notes with his presents... Uncle Sam takes note of your presence.

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On the 4th of july firefighters fight fire with fire Because fireworks

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He says to his wife: "Sleeping with you is like Christmas, Birthday and the 4th of July in a single moment." To which she replies: "Well, each of those dates is just once per year too."

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So I'm dating this European girl. I told her I wanna be with her 24/7. She said: "ok, see you the 24th of July"

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Does Britain have the 4th of July? Or do the calendars just go July 3rd, July 5th, July 6th?

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Do they have the 4th of July in Great Britain? Yes, but they don't celebrate it.

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^(courtesy of my neighbor who probably stole it from somewhere)

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