Owl Jokes

Contents

Funniest Owl Jokes

Dad joke warning ⚠ Knock, knock...
Who's there?
Cargo.
Cargo who?
Nope. Owl go who. Car go beep beep.

I warned you.

I won a Gold medal! Wow! Thank you /u/ArticCamels! I appreciate you... Be safe out there.

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BOSS: I've called you here because I suspect one of you is an owl?

ME: Who?

*everyone stares at me, even Gary whose head is turned 180Β°*

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What's the difference between a tuna, a piano, and an owl? You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna.

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What's the difference between a sniper with bad eyesight and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit, the other hoots but can't sh*t

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What do you call a wet baby owl? A moist owlette.

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What's the difference between a sniper with bad eyesight and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit, the other hoots but can't sh...

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Me: Someone we know is possessed by an owl. Friend: Who?

Me: [narrows eyes]

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Funny Owl Jokes
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What's the difference between a short sighted marksman and a constipated owl? One can shoot but can't hit..

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What's the difference between a poor marksman and a constipated owl? One shoots and shoots but can't hit, and the other...

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What does a pretentious owl say? Whom whom.

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What's the difference between a sniper with bad eyesight and a constipated owl? One shoots but can't hit, the other hoots but can't...

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What do you call an owl with a PhD? Doctor who

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The thing about bird jokes are... sometimes they're hard to swallow.

Owl let myself out.

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What's the difference between a bad sniper and a constipated owl? One can shoot but not hit, the other can hoot but not sh*t.

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How long does it take for an owl to die? Six and a fifth books.

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So I told my girlfriend someone's out there making owl noises and she's like "who"

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Whats the difference between a blind sniper and a constipated owl One shoots and cant hit...

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I recently tried the fruitarian diet, where you can only eat things that fall from trees I only lasted a day. All I had was 3 apples and an owl.

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what's the difference between a cross-eyed hunter and a constipated owl? the hunter shoots but can't hit...

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My website just crashed from a huge influx of traffic today... I wonder why so many people are interested in my superb owl, today of all days. I mean, he's really great and all, but he's just an owl.

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What's the difference between a hunter and a constipated owl? One shoots and tries to hit, the other hoots and tries to...

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Did you hear about the cursed night bird that lives in the reservoir? Well owl be damned.

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What's an owl's favourite drink? Hoot beer!

Sorry, I made this joke up when I was 5 and just wanted to share :P

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What do you call a religious owl? A bird of pray.

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What do you call a baby owl in the rain? A moist owlette

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What is the owl's favorite school subject? Owlgebra

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I don't care how great owls are I'm not throwing some stupid party over a superb owl.

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What's the average lifespan of an owl? About six and a half books.

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What do you call an owl that does magic? Hooooooo-dini!

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A man and his pet owl go to the bar together They had a hoot.

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What the difference between an owl, and a good archer. A good archer shoots and hits.

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What did the narcissistic owl say? Me me me

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What do you call an Owl taking a bath? ... A moist owlette

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What was that famous owl veterinarian's name again? Dr. Who^^^please ^^^dont ^^^kill ^^^me

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Did you hear about the owl who fell in love with the goat? They had a hootin-nanny.

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What do you call an owl that loves to raise owlets? A hoot-nanny!

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What's the most common type of owl in Great Britain? Teatowel.


Sorry if you've heard or seen this before on here; I've not and I'm unable to search because I'm using the mobile sitem

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When does an Owl go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!

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How do you know which bird will always go all-in on a hand in poker? An owl. Because it's owl nothing.

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New Owl Jokes

An Owl goes to a bar... -Knock Knock...
-Who's there?
-Owl...
-Owl who?
Owl who, whoo, whooo... *hoots continuously

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what makes an owl and a proboscis monkey special? who nose

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What's an owl that does magic called? Whoudini

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What does the French owl say? Qui Qui

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I've named the owl that flies near my home after our 45th President Vladmir Hootin

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That owl asked the introspect question evee Who are you??

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What do you call an owl that has a good time babysitting? A hootenanny.

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Have you ever noticed that all the characters in Winnie the Pooh have names that reflect what they are? Piglet is a little πŸ–

Tigger is a πŸ…

Rabbit is a 🐰

Owl is an πŸ¦‰

And "Eeyore" is the sound people make when they're clinically depressed.

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What did Owl say to Winnie-the-Pooh wanting to buy Minoxidil? It’s just sham, Pooh!

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Where in Russia did the barn owl live? In Barnaul.

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Today an owl was found murdered by another owl. Police say it was a drive-by hooting.

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What sound does a streaming owl make? Hulu, hulu

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I had a pet owl that like to sing songs to me... ...it was really a hoot.

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An owl was sitting in a tree saying "How? How?" He was lysdexic.

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Why did the redneck hire an owl to watch his children? He wanted to have a hootenanny.

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A cat got his owl friend pregnant They're expecting meowls.

<(OvO)> Lowl

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