Dad joke warning ⚠
Nope. Owl go who. Car go beep beep.
I warned you.
What does a pretentious owl say? Whom whom.
What do you call an owl with a PhD? Doctor who
Nope. Owl go who. Car go beep beep.
How long does it take for an owl to die? Six and a fifth books.
So I told my girlfriend someone's out there making owl noises and she's like "who"
Whats the difference between a blind sniper and a constipated owl One shoots and cant hit...
Did you hear about the cursed night bird that lives in the reservoir? Well owl be damned.
What do you call a baby owl in the rain? A moist owlette
A man and his pet owl go to the bar together They had a hoot.
What do you call an owl that does magic? Hooooooo-dini!
What's the difference between a hoedown and a hootenanny? One's when your prostitute falls on the floor, and the other is when your babbysitter is making owl sounds.
I can't stop shitting out feathers. I think I've got Irritable owl syndrome.
Joker: "Someone said you sound like an owl more than a bat" Bat: "WHO?"
Why didn't the night owl go to the funeral? He wasn't a mourning person
What is the lifespan of an Owl ? About 6.25 books.
I found a babysitter who works in an owl costume She's a hootin'-nanny
Ultimate Dad Joke
Son: Dad, what noise does an owl make at night?
Finally got to pull this one off after 6 years of patiently waiting!!
What does a narcissistic owl say? A: Me. Me. Me.
An owl and a squirrel are in a tree watching a farmer go by The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.
Sleep joke Why be an early bird or night owl when you can just be an insomniac and get the best of both worlds.
What does the cat in bird mask say? Me owl
What did the narcissistic owl say? Me me me
I've named the owl that flies near my home after our 45th President Vladmir Hootin
A man and a wizard are having a dispute.
In a fit of rage, the wizard places a curse on the man.
"Now you can only speak using the names of animals!" Shouts the wizard.
The man replies, "Whale, owl bee."
What is the most common Owl in the UK? The TeatOwl of course;)
Whats red and white and sits in a tree? A sanitary owl
How long does an owl live? About 6 1/2 books
If you ever see an baby owl in a toilet don't flush... Because you aren't supposed to flush moist owelettes.
I tried being a fruitarian
That's where you can only eat things that have fallen off trees.
I managed one day, I had 3 apples and an owl
An owl was investigated as a suspect in the serial murders of eight random individuals in under a year But the case went cold after repeatedly insisting it didn't know the victims' names.
What do you call an owl escapologist? The great Hootini
What do you call an owl magician? A whooodini
"Hey, I heard somebody called you an owl today." Who?
What do you get when cross an owl with an elephant? A dead owl with a six inch wide hole in it.
What did the owl say to the squirrel? Nothing. Because owls don't talk. Then it ate the squirrel, because owls are birds of prey.
I got a new job at the owl sanctuary.. It’s night shifts but i hear it’s a real hoot
How long does an owl live? About 6 and a half books.
What did the Soccer players day when the owl died on the field?
Did you hear about the California owl conspiracy network? They're allegedly calling themselves the "ca-hoots".
What does an owl call it’s beak? Hoo nose.
And then there was the male spotted owl who told his wife, "What do you mean you have a headache? We're and endangered species!"
What do call a magic owl
Sorry if somebody made this joke already
An Owl goes to a bar...
Owl who, whoo, whooo... *hoots continuously
Why couldn’t the People in Owl City sleep? There were to many fireflies.
what makes an owl and a proboscis monkey special? who knows
What's an owl that does magic called? Whoudini
What does the French owl say? Qui Qui
Two rabbits really wanted to have babies but couldn't. So they went to the wise old owl and asked for help.
The owl looked them over, stroked its feathery chin, blinked a few times and said:
"Now... look here boys..."
How long does an owl live? 6 1/2 books.
What do you call an owl that has a good time babysitting? A hootenanny.
What do you call an owl with PhD? Doctor Who
Someone here is possessed by a owl Who.
Why did the owl go to the gym? Because he’s the stare master.
Did you hear about the Owl that could play American football? It was a superb_owl.
What did the scientist say when he found a new species of nocturnal bird with a stinger stuck in a manmade aquifer? Well owl bee
What did Owl say to Winnie-the-Pooh wanting to buy Minoxidil? It’s just sham, Pooh!
An owl babysat my son so I could go to the hoedown. It was a hootin' nanny.
What did one owl say to the other owl? Don't be silly, owls can't talk
How do you know which bird will always go all-in on a hand in poker? An owl. Because it's owl nothing.
“I’m an owl”
“I’m an owl who?”
“Exactly, you are”
Never heard this Knock Knock joke before.
You sound like an Owl
When does an Owl go "mooooo"? When it is learning a new language!
I was just washing up in the kitchen with the back door open, when an owl suddenly flew in, dried all the pots, put them away and flew off. it was a Teat Owl
What's the most common type of owl in Great Britain?
Sorry if you've heard or seen this before on here; I've not and I'm unable to search because I'm using the mobile sitem
My wife asked me ‘What’s Harry Potter’s owl called’? I paused and said OWL-BERT
I believe I have invented a totally new 'Knock knock' joke. Messieurs, mesdames, please gather round for... Easily Annoyed Owl.
Easily Annoyed Owl.
Easily Annoyed Owl who...?
...ARE YOU MAKING FUN OF ME?
What do you call an Owl taking a bath? ... A moist owlette
The owl didn't like going on dates when it rained... It was too wet to woo
Where in Russia did the barn owl live? In Barnaul.
"Why did you name your owl Fred?" "Because I'm Batman."
What do you call an owl that loves to raise owlets? A hoot-nanny!
What do you get when you cross an owl with a skunk? Something that smells but doesn't give a hoot!
What sound does a Spanish owl make? Quien, quien
What's an Owl favorite DJ? Deamau5.
What's the most common owl in Britain? The Tea towel.
Today an owl was found murdered by another owl. Police say it was a drive-by hooting.
What sound does a streaming owl make? Hulu, hulu
Did you hear about the owl who fell in love with the goat? They had a hootin-nanny.
What did the farmer say to Pat Sajak? I'd like to buy an owl
What does a blonde owl say? Why!
I had a pet owl that like to sing songs to me... ...it was really a hoot.
A Parrot was charged with murder
A parrot was charged with murder in Iran with an owl as an accomplice. Two birds, one stoned.
An owl was sitting in a tree saying "How? How?" He was lysdexic.
An owl and a mouse are sitting on a branch when a farmer walks by below. The owl turns to the mouse and says nothing. Because owls can't speak. The owl then eats the mouse because it's a bird of prey.
Why did the redneck hire an owl to watch his children? He wanted to have a hootenanny.
A cat got his owl friend pregnant
They're expecting meowls.
Today, my owl buddy told me he was getting married.
I replied 'you twit, to who?'
How long does an owl live? About six and a half books.
How long can an Owl live? 6 1/2 books...
My Mexican friend told me this one. Whats an owl say? ¿Quien?
What do you call an owl who does magic? WHO-DINI
Did you hear about the owl coup? They were in cahoots.
Make Up Your Mind...Are You A Pig or an Owl
Involuntary owl who?
Do you know what the worst thing about an owl is? They maintain eye contact when you microwave them
Whats the difference between a white owl and black owl?
A white owl goes : Who? Who?
A black owl goes : Who dat? who dat?
I went to an owl party last night. Contrary to my expectations it wasn't very much fun at all.
What was that famous owl veterinarian's name again? Dr. Who^^^please ^^^dont ^^^kill ^^^me
What do you get when you hire an owl to babysit your kids? A real hootenanny!
What do Mike Jones and an owl have in common? Who?