Hilarious Polish Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Polish Jokes

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Girls use chemicals to remove polish and no one bats an eye But when hitler does it everyone loses their mind

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What does a polish bride get on her wedding night that is long and hard? a new last name

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Use chemicals to remove polish and no one bats an eye Use chemicals to remove the Polish and you're literally Hitler.

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What is long and hard that a Polish bride gets on her wedding night? A new last name.

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What do you call a Polish fisherman? A fishing pole.

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A girl uses chemicals to remove polish and no one looks twice And yet when Hitler tried it, everyone threw a fit

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A frog decided to trace his genealogy one day... He discovered he was a tad Polish.

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A Polish man goes to the eye doctor... A Polish man goes to the eye doctor. The bottom line of the eye chart has the letters:

C Z Y N Q S T A S Z

The Optometrist asks „Can you read this?”

„Read it?”, the Pole replies, „I know the guy!”

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Last night, I gave my girlfriend a medieval battle uniform to polish while I went to the bar. I mean, she always said she wanted... ...a night in, shining armor.

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Why does Hitler like acetone? It's a Polish Remover

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Use chemicals to remove polish and no one cares.. But use chemicals to remove Polish and you're literally Hitler.

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Using chemicals to remove polish is fine... But use chemicals to remove the Polish and you're suddenly Hitler!

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Sieg Heil by Covergirl Girls use chemicals to remove polish and no one panics.
Hitler does the same thing and everyone loses their minds.

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What do panties and nail polish have in common? Both come off with alcohol

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I have a polish friend who is a sound technician. and a Czech one. A Czech one too. A Czech one too.

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I have a Polish friend who is a sound technician. I have a Czech one too.

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What was the first thing Hitler bought from the beauty shop? Polish remover

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What's the cleanest language in the world? Polish

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What's long and hard that a Polish bride gets on her wedding night? A new last name.

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At Polish man has an appointment at the oculist The doctor shows him a sign:.

WYRZYKOWTACZ.

Doctor: "Could you read those letters?"

Polish patient: "Letters? I know that guy!"

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I ran my car into a pole late last night The worst part was the awful sound it made, but I don't speak polish so I just kept driving

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A Polish man was getting his eyesight tested The optician brings out a card with the letters

C X W I N O X S T A Z

"Can you read the letters" asks the optician.

The Polish man:"Read it? I know the guy.

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What does a Polish man give his wife on their wedding night that's long and hard? His last name

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What do Hitler and teenage girls have in common? They both use chemicals to remove the polish.

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I Had A Polish Friend Who's A Sound Technician... Oh, and a Czech one too. Czech one too. Czech one too.

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I have a Polish sound engineer friend. I also have a Czech one, too.

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A Polish Immigrant applies for a driver's license First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test.

The optician showed him a card with the letters

'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.'

'Can you read this?' the optician asked.

'Read it?' the Polish guy replied, 'I know the guy.'

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A Polish man was at the Eye Doctor to test his sight, and looked at a chart with the following letters: G U O Y L V B J I T D A Z C K

Doctor: Can you read the letters?

Polish Man: Of course i can read it, I know the guy!

Score: 72

Capital letters... ...the difference between using chemicals to remove polish, and using chemicals to remove Polish.

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Girls use chemicals to remove polish on a daily and no one bats an eye... But when Hitler does it everyone loses their mind

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I have a Polish friend who's a sound technician. Oh, and a Czech one too. Czech one too. Czech one too.

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What does a Polish bride get on her wedding night that is long and hard? A new surname.

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So, the baby frog finally got his Ancestry.com results in... It turns out he is a tad Polish.

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Polish history in five words: Stuck between Germany & Russia.

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Why did the polish person marry someone from the other side of the country? Because opposite poles attract

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I have a Polish friend who is a sound technician I have a Czech one two, a Czech one two

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Did you hear about the frog that traced his lineage back to Warsaw? He was a tad polish.

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How did Germany so easily defeat Poland during WWII? When the Polish threw grenades at the Germans, the Germans pulled the pins and threw them back.

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Do you know what do women and nail polish have in common? they both undress with the help
of alchocol

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New Polish Jokes

Polish talks to Russian I heard that it is -60 degrees here in winter. No, only -30. Then why do they say it's -60? Maybe outside.

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What does woman and nail polish have in common? They both go down easily with alcohol.

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The 3 shortest books ever written are: Polish Wisdom

Jewish Business Ethics

Black Guys I Met While Yachting

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You can take a Turk to Poland but you can't Polish a Kurd.

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Sean Connery dials 911..... Is this the polish.

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Ho did Germany beat Poland in WWII? Well... when the Polish threw grenades at the Germans，the Germans pulled the pins and threw them back!

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My grandad walked into the room with his tackle out, smothered in boot polish. Bless him, he misheard when we told him to turn his clock back.

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What did the polish tourist say to another polish tourist friend in lybia? Have you seen three pole

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Why do Russian women go to Polish beauty salons on Halloween? They're not called uroda salons for nothing!

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Polish to the left of me, arabs to the right, Here I am, stuck in an immigrant queue

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I work in a mirror factory I broke a polishing machine a few days ago and my boss told me to reflect on what I've done.

I told him I couldn't because the mirrors were too blurry but I'll polish on my actions

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I have a Polish friend who works as an audio engineer. and a Czech one too. Czech one too.

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I'm not sure why people were so surprised by the quality of The Witcher 3 It's a well known fact that games benefit from a lot of polish.

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Polish people are really knowledgeable about politics. Every time the news is on they keep saying "Let's see what the Poles have to say."

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What language should you write something in if you want it to go viral? Polish. It'll spread from Pole to Pole.

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How do you stop a Polish tank? Shoot the guys pushing it.

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What did the Polish father say to his pregnant daughter? Are you sure it's yours?

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My polish friend went to the Optometrist the other day. The Dr. Asked him to read the 6th line down. The letters were "GOLVIJKSTRL". My friend said "Read it? I know the guy!"...

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Do you know where frogs come from? They're German, Russian and a tad Polish

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A Polish couple were at a drive-in... ...and they were making out, and things were getting serious.

She looks at him with a shy grin and asks, "Do you want to go to the back seat?"

He laughs and says, "No way! I'm staying up here with you!"

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Girls use chemicals to remove polish, and no one bats an eye. Hitler uses chemicals to remove Polish, and he's a bad person!?

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What did the Polish horse thief say to the other Polish horse thief? "Boy these things are heavy."

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What do you call a person pretending to be Polish? A faux-lak

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How do you defeat Polish cavalry? Turn off the merry-go-round

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A Polish terrorist was sent to blow up a car. He failed. He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipe.

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A Polish man read... That 90% of fatal auto accidents happen within 10 miles of home. As the father of two teenage drivers, he picked up and moved the family 25 miles away to be extra safe.

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How did Germany take over Poland so quick in World War 2? The Germans marched in backwards, so the Polish thought they were leaving

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I have a Polish friend who's a sound technician... Oh, and a Czech one too

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I've got a Polish friend who's a sound engineer. I've got a Czech one, too.

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I don't like all these immigrants in Britain. Coming over here, taking our Polish people's jobs.

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Use chemicals to remove nail polish and its fine But once you use chemicals to remove the Polish, you're suddenly Hitler.

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A Polish person went to have their eyes tested. The eye test chart read: N Y X C S F R U Z. The optom asked, ‘can you read any of those letters?’ ‘read it?’ the polish person answered, ‘i know him!’

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Where do frogs come from? They're German and a tad-polish

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What do you call a Polish chicken stuck in a tree? Poll tree!

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There is a Polish supermarket around the corner from my house. I tried to go there after the last election, but the polls were closed.

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Why did the polish spy fail in his mission to blow up Hitlers car. He kept burning his lips on the muffler.

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