A mugger jumps out in front of a university student...
...and shouts "your money or your life!"
The student keeps walking, and says "Sorry mate, I'm a Computer Science student. I don't have either".
Me: I'm so sorry, my dog ate my homework
Computer Science Professor: Your dog ate your coding assignment?
Me: It took him a couple bytes
I don't like computer science jokes.. Not one bit
There are 2 truly difficult problems in Computer Science
0: Naming things
1: Cache invalidation
2: Off by one errors
What do you call it when computer science majors make fun of each other? Cyber boolean
I majored in Politics, Computer Science, and Dance. Now I'm stuck writing Al Gore Rhythms.
The girls in my computer science class are like the matrix All you see is a bunch of ones and zeroes
Why did Steve Irwin fail his computer science class? String Arrays
I would talk about computer science... But it makes my mother board
Yesterday, my computer science teacher was teaching us about for-loops... ... he said it was a *for n* concept.
Computer Science major walks into an English class
The Professor says "Welcome to English 101".
The student panicks.
"What's wrong?" asks the Professor.
"I missed the first 4 English classes".
I've decided I'm going to major in computer science and Japanese. I'm gonna master weeb design.
Your computer science teaching momma is so fat... ... she can flatten a binary tree in O(1).
A computer science teacher asks the class to turn to page 404. The students search feverishly, to no avail
What do you call a nap in computer science class? A CS-ta
I wanted to study Computer Science but then I stopped... Turns out its just a sudo science.
My dog ate my computer science project
"your dog ate your coding assignment?"
It took him a couple bytes
How physicists see other sciences:
Biology: squishy physics
Geology: slow physics
Computer Science: virtual physics
Psychology: people physics
Chemistry: impure physics
Math: physics minus the units
Why isn't there any beautiful girl in computer science? Because they're all 0's and 1's
Why did the transgender person fail computer science? Because they were non-binary
A computer science major goes to his English professor and says "I've found a fault in the English language and I need an entomologist."
"Don't you mean an etymologist?" the teacher asks.
"No," the student replies. "It's a bug, not a feature."
Why didn't the client tip the server?
Because they didn't have enough cache!
(Computer Science nerds unite! This is my original joke, I originally posted it on Imgflip last year with bad pun dog and it got a decent response.)
Computer Science joke: After you've been bit 8 times by a mosquito does that been you have a mosquito byte? Not understanding this joke is what causes malaria.
Why did the computer science student drop out? He just couldn't hack it.
Why can a girl not get laid in the computer science field? the odds might be good. but the goods are odd
My computer science professor was fired for giving a lecture in Octal My school has very strict policies regarding eight-speech.
Every day at my 4 PM computer science class that the teacher is late to... "4:04 teacher not found"
If you want to be a computer science major, all you have do is get sick. Before long you’ll be coughing and hacking.
I don't care for computer science. Not one bit.