A mugger jumps out in front of a university student...
...and shouts "your money or your life!"
The student keeps walking, and says "Sorry mate, I'm a Computer Science student. I don't have either".
Me: I'm so sorry, my dog ate my homework
Computer Science Professor: Your dog ate your coding assignment?
Me: It took him a couple bytes
I don't like computer science jokes.. Not one bit
There are 2 truly difficult problems in Computer Science
0: Naming things
1: Cache invalidation
2: Off by one errors
What do you call it when computer science majors make fun of each other? Cyber boolean
I majored in Politics, Computer Science, and Dance. Now I'm stuck writing Al Gore Rhythms.
The girls in my computer science class are like the matrix All you see is a bunch of ones and zeroes
Why did Steve Irwin fail his computer science class? String Arrays
I would talk about computer science... But it makes my mother board
Yesterday, my computer science teacher was teaching us about for-loops... ... he said it was a *for n* concept.
Computer Science major walks into an English class
The Professor says "Welcome to English 101".
The student panicks.
"What's wrong?" asks the Professor.
"I missed the first 4 English classes".
I've decided I'm going to major in computer science and Japanese. I'm gonna master weeb design.
Your computer science teaching momma is so fat... ... she can flatten a binary tree in O(1).
A computer science teacher asks the class to turn to page 404. The students search feverishly, to no avail
What do you call a nap in computer science class? A CS-ta
I wanted to study Computer Science but then I stopped... Turns out its just a sudo science.
My dog ate my computer science project
"your dog ate your coding assignment?"
It took him a couple bytes
How physicists see other sciences:
Biology: squishy physics
Geology: slow physics
Computer Science: virtual physics
Psychology: people physics
Chemistry: impure physics
Math: physics minus the units
A computer science major goes to his English professor and says "I've found a fault in the English language and I need an entomologist."
"Don't you mean an etymologist?" the teacher asks.
"No," the student replies. "It's a bug, not a feature."
Why didn't the client tip the server?
Because they didn't have enough cache!
(Computer Science nerds unite! This is my original joke, I originally posted it on Imgflip last year with bad pun dog and it got a decent response.)
Why isn't there any beautiful girl in computer science? Because they're all 0's and 1's
Why did the transgender person fail computer science? Because they were non-binary
Computer Science joke: After you've been bit 8 times by a mosquito does that been you have a mosquito byte? Not understanding this joke is what causes malaria.
Why did the computer science student drop out? He just couldn't hack it.
Why can a girl not get laid in the computer science field? the odds might be good. but the goods are odd
My computer science professor was fired for giving a lecture in Octal My school has very strict policies regarding eight-speech.
Every day at my 4 PM computer science class that the teacher is late to... "4:04 teacher not found"
If you want to be a computer science major, all you have do is get sick. Before long you’ll be coughing and hacking.
I don't care for computer science. Not one bit.