Tall Jokes

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Funniest Tall Jokes

Guys I just recently bought a 256GB iPhone 7 Plus, my son dropped it and the screen shattered. Anyways I'm doing a giveaway! The kid is 8 years old, cute, thin and not really tall.

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Funny Tall Jokes
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How did Kevin Spacey find the little boy in all the Tall grass? Satisfying.

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A physicist sees a person on the top of a very tall building. "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"

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Men call short women "petite". What do women call short men? Um, yeh, they don't call.

Source: I'm not a tall man.

Score: 206

I recently bought a 256GB iPhone X, my son dropped it and the screen shattered. Anyway, I'm doing a giveaway. The kid is 8 years old, cute, thin and not very tall.

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A tall guy walks into a bar that's what he gets for being tall

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I asked a tall guy "how's the weather up there" He spat on me and told me it's raining

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Ukrainian authorities are planning to turn the Chernobyl exclusion zone into an amusement park They say the only difference between it and Disneyland will be that the six foot tall mouse isn't a costume.

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How did the priest find the little boy in the tall grass? Delightful

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How did the hillbilly find the sheep in the tall grass? Satisfying

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A physicist notices a man about to jump of a really tall building, he yells: DONT JUMP YOU HAVE SO MUCH POTENTIAL

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I went to school with a very tall guy named Jimmy Glasscock. You could always see him coming.

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I just purchased a new iPhone 7 Plus, and my son dropped it, So i’m giving it away. He’s 8 years old, tall and quite thin. Good with pets.

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They always asked me if I play basketball because I was tall. They stopped asking me that when I asked them if they play mini golf.

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The Ukrainian government is opening up a tourist attraction in Chernobyl. It will be like Disney World, except the six foot tall mouse is real.

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What's 8 feet tall, covered in fur, and walks around the Himalayas undermining your arguments by attacking your character? The Adhomineminal Snowman

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It doesn't matter if you're black, white, old, young, tall, short or even if you're from another country. It's what's INSIDE that counts! I love you refrigerator!

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There's a type of mustard gas that stays near the ground and only kills people less than 4 feet tall. It's used in chemical dwarfare.

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Why did Dave Grohl buy such a tall house? He wanted to make sure he was getting the best, the best, the best, the best-a view.

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A man is standing on the top of a tall building about to commit suicide... ...when a physicist at the bottom shouts up, "Don't do it! You have so much potential!"

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Being tall is an enormous responsibility Short people look up to you.

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Did you know the Hover Dam was supposed to be twice as tall as it is now? After some re-evaluation, they thought it would be 2 dam high.


I’ll see myself out...

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How do you knock out a Muslim who is over 6 foot tall? With a hijab

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How did the Scotsman find the sheep in tall grass? Very satisfying.

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How tall is the world smallest grandmother? One Nanameter.

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How did the redneck find the sheep in the tall grass? Satisfying.

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A man is standing on a tall ledge. A physicist yells from the street, "Don't jump! You have too much potential!"

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Optimist: Glass half full Pessimist : Glass half empty

Engineer: Glass is too tall.

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How does a Scotsman find a sheep in the tall grass? Very satisfying.

Retweaked joke:
How does a (insert nationality here) find a sheep in the tall grass?
Very (insert extremely lustful emotion here)!

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What do girls call guys who are less than 6 feet tall? Friends.

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Which Goddess is 3.37 feet tall? Demeter

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It's so sad... that trees look at telephone poles, and think that being tall and skinny is the only way to get people talking.

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What do tall people and black people have in common? They have no one to look up to.

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How did the farmer find his sheep in the tall grass? Very satisfying ;)




(Sorry if this has been here but it was new to me)

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What did the policeman say to the guy about to jump from a tall building? You've got a lot of potential!

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What do you get when you fuse a short man and a tall woman? Your medical licence revoked, sicko.

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Everytime I leave the house... I keep getting followed by this really tall bird, I think I'm being storked.

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What do you call a four foot tall mind-reader who escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

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How tall is Betsy DeVos? We don't know, she can't measure growth.

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New Tall Jokes

Did you know tall people are usually bad at math? ... cus it’s the little things that count

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My parents were both 4 feet tall... They struggled to put food on the table.

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I refuse to date tall people. Because I can’t handle my partner looking down on me.

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I was hanging off a tall scyscraper. I lost 25% of my grip and fell. Rip.

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It’s ok to make fun of tall people You’re literally punching up!

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You know what’s cool about tall people? There always people you can look up to.

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What do you call it when a tall person and a short person do 69? 6q

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A man is approached at a hospital “How tall are you?”

“5’8”, doctor.”

“Oh, I’m very sorry; but I’m not the doctor. I’m the carpenter.”

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Did you hear about the guy who says he saw a giraffe with a tail longer than it’s neck? I think he’s just telling tall tails

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Sorry if it offends anyone but my black friend told me this special one. Why are black people so tall?

because their kneegrows

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What do you call your tall husband? A daddy long legs

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What do you call a bird that sits atop a tall metal tower A crane

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Its easy to spot an American spy, just ask them how tall they are If they answer in feet you have your answer.

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Why are tall trees so happy? They are high.

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An under-appreciated benefit of being 6 ft tall Not a lot of people look down on you

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A tall man taught me how to lay tents. Although he left before I got to show him what I learnt, It was still lay tent learning.

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I think tall people are the best role models I know I’ll always look up to them

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I heard that the cat with the worlds longest tail is 7 feet... But I think that’s just a tall tail.

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Tall people and Short people should never date. Long distance relationships never work out.

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How does the Scitsman find his sheep in the tall grass? Very satisfying.

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Its better to have loved a short girl and lost than never to have loved a tall

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How do you tell a tall person on the internet? Don't worry, they'll bring it up no matter the context.

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How tall is Sarah Jessica Parker? 15.3 hands.

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Two kids were talking together. First: "My daddy is so tall that he can touch the clouds in the sky with his hands.
" Second: "That is excellent. Does your daddy touch something soft and downy?
" First: "Yes, of course.
" Second: "Those are my daddy's testicles."

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Tall things are usually unstable... The exception is Kim Jong Un.

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A small well goes to the doctors... Doctor says, "what seems to be the problem?"

The well replies, "I'm not a tall well."

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Tall people are less tired than small ones Because they are longer in bed.

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If you fell off a tall building If you fell off a tall building and had never studied physics, would you understand the gravity of the situation?

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Tall people are so rude. It's like they're always looking down on you.

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I bet all really tall people... are afraid of ducks.

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One of the stupidest jokes Why are black people so tall, because their knee grows

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My friend told me all semites are short. I disagreed. One day, as we were walking around town, we spotted a very grown man in a yarmulke.

I said to my friend: "Tall jew!".

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If you're a tall person and someone asks you if you play basketball Ask them if they play mini golf

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I like my women like I like my pool tables... Fast, loose, and 3 feet tall.

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What do girls call men that are shorter than 6 feet tall? Friends

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I like my women like I like my pool tables... Fast, loose, and three feet tall.

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I ordered a tall blonde at Starbucks but all I got was this coffee...

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Why are tall meteorologists the best? Because they have their heads in the clouds.

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That building is so tall... that if you jumped from the roof, you would die of old age.

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It's great being tall. People really look up to you.

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After days of refusing, the boy finally worked up the courage to climb a tall tree He really went out on a limb

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Why can't your lawn be 3 feet tall? 'Cause then it'd be a yard.

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Why didn't the necrophile like tall girls He likes them 6 feet under.

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Starbucks staff are so lazy I only asked for a small coffee and they said "that's a tall order."

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Why is it always a good idea to wear 'tall pants'? Because it's a practice of good high-jean!

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A huge man with really long legs was standing right beside my bed whilst I slept last night, and so I kicked him hard in the shin. Turns out it wasn't a tall man and my top bunk came crashing down on my face.

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When I get Starbucks in the morning, I always ask for a Norwegian. It's a tall blonde.

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How does a Welshman find sheep in tall grass? Irresistible.

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What do you call a 6 feet tall circle that recently got his diploma from college? A Graduated cylinder.

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Did you hear about the 3 new types of Barbie dolls? There's tall, short, and great personality

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A very tall and handsome man walks into a bar and suffers a mild concussion.

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My 6' tall female friend complains that she can't ever find pants long enough to fit. Try Amazon.com

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