I watched the video of my wedding backwards.
I almost cried when I took the ring back, gave her back to her father, moonwalked out of the church, and went away, free.
Wow: I made it to front page! Thanks guys!
My friend wanted to feel like a princess on her wedding day So we made her marry a man she never met in order to secure a French alliance.
What did Kate Middleton find out on her wedding night? That not all rulers are twelve inches long
I hope they serve cookies at the Royal Wedding this weekend Just to show how a touch of brown sugar makes a ginger snap.
At a wedding reception, the best man said, 'would all the married men please stand next to the person that made their lives worth living.' The poor bartender was crushed to death.
What's the difference between a Syrian wedding and an ISIS training camp? I don't know man, I just fly the drone.
Wife: "You need to watch A Series of Unfortunate Events" Me: "okay, I'll get out the wedding video"
What is the difference between a Pakistani Wedding and a Taliban training camp? I don't know, I just fly the drone.
What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? There's one less drunk at the funeral.
Watching my wedding video in reverse brought tears to my eyes I took off her wedding ring, returned her to her dad, and moonwalked my way out of the church.
What is the difference between an irish wedding and an irish funeral?
One fewer drunk person.
Edit: Fewer, not less
Tinder is for rookies Go to Facebook Marketplace and search for wedding dresses. It'll show you recently divorced females in your area. From there you can filter by size.
Hi! I've got 2 tickets for the final of Euro 2016 but forgot that it's on the same day as my wedding so I can't go.
If you are interested and want to go instead of me ...
... It's at St. Nicholas' Church, Brighton and she's called Jane.
What's the difference between a Pakistani wedding party and an Al-Qaeda training camp? Dunno, I just fly the drone.
I played my wedding video backwards today. It really cheered me up to see me take the ring off my wife's finger, walk out of church and go drinking with my friends.
I recently watched my wedding video backwards. I love the part where I take the ring off her finger, leave the church and go drinking with my friends.
A man is watching tv and starts yelling "No! No! DONT GO IN THE CHURCH!!!"
The wife from another room asks: "honey what are you watching?"
Husband: our wedding video
At an Irish wedding reception someone yelled:
"Would all the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living"
The bartender was nearly crushed to death.
Did you know there are 3 rings in a relationship? The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffer ring
Why did the dad proton want his daughter proton to marry an electron? So the wedding would be free of charge
Every marriage has 3 rings. First is the engagement ring. Second, the wedding ring. Then comes the suffering.
My wife was giving a speech at her parents’ wedding anniversary, and my phone battery ran out in the middle of recording it. Now I’ll never hear the end of it.
I was taught there are 3 rings in life. The engagement ring. The wedding ring. And the suffering.
In marriage there are 3 types of rings The engagement ring, the wedding ring and the suffering.
Two antenna met on a roof... fell in love and got married. The wedding wasn't much but the reception was *excellent*.
A man watches TV
Α man watches TV and start shouting :
Dont go, Dont do it...Dont do it...NOOOOOOO
His wife comes in and says : What are you watching there ?
And the man says : I was just watching our wedding on DVD
My wife is so sweet Every time she goes to a bar alone she gives me her wedding ring so I can think about her all night long.
Two little boys are at a wedding when one leans over to other and asks:
"How many wives are we allowed to have?"
His friend answered "Sixteen. Four better, four worse, four richer and four poorer!"
The MC at an Irish wedding made a toast. "Can all the married men please stand next to the one person who has made their lives meaningful". ...The bartender was subsequently crushed to death.
I have this crush on a girl at work, so I got her address She seemed a little creeped out when she saw it was a wedding dress though.
What happened at the cannibal’s wedding party?
They toasted the bride and groom...
My 7yo told me I had to post this. Enjoy the giggle!
I saw my wife slightly drunk, yelling at the TV :”Don’t go in the church, you moron” She’s watching our wedding video again
I started reading 'Lord of Rings' for the new year. Apparently Gollum was once a normal man, but wearing the ring drained his youth, energy, and joy in life... Turns out the one ring, is a wedding ring
A man screams at his TV, "No, you idiot! Don't walk into the chapel!"
"Horror movie?" his wife asks from the kitchen.
"No," he replies, "Our wedding video."
Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? The wedding sucked but the reception was amazing!!!
What's the difference between a irish wedding and an irish funeral? One person isn't drinking.
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love, and got married... The wedding wasn’t much but the reception was excellent.
Q: What is the difference between Russian wedding and Russian funeral? A: There is one sober person in a Russian funeral.
You know what the 3 rings of marriage are?
The engagement ring.
The wedding ring.
And the suffering.
Instead of using Tinder or Bumble, go on Facebook Marketplace and search for wedding dresses for sale. You will receive a list of recently divorced women in your immediate area, for free. Plus you can filter by size.
I got to be the DJ at my uncle's wedding Apparently, having "I Love Little Girls" by Oingo Boingo play ruined the mood for everybody.
During my wedding speech, I told everyone who is married to stand next to the one person that has made their life worth living. The bartender was almost trampled to death.
I went to a wedding and they played "The Twist" so I did the Twist, then they played "Macerena" so I did the Macerena then they played "Come On Eileen" So I was told to leave.
I looked longingly into my beloved's eyes and whispered, "A...E...I...O...U...and sometimes, Y." The priest then turned to her. "And has the bride prepared any wedding vowels? "
On my wedding day, My dad sat me down and had "the talk" with me.
Dad: Son, you will have to make a choice now. You can be right, or you can be happy. But you cannot be both.
I think for a moment
Me: but ever since I can remember, you are always wrong.
My father always told me that I could get married once I left school. I didn't get the reasoning, but I scheduled my wedding for 3pm just to be sure.
While digging a hole in my garden, i found my lost wedding ring.. I rushed in to tell my wife, but remembered why i was digging the hole in the first place.
I attended my first cannibal wedding the other day Favorite part was when the best man roasted the groom. It was savage.
What’s the difference between an Islamic wedding and an ISIS training ground? I don’t know, I just fly the drone.
Went to ask my girlfriends father for permission to marry
He said: "Give me one good reason you'd make a good husband or even a decent father or I'm leaving!"
I replied: "Hi leaving I'm John!"
The wedding is next month
What did Bill Gates wife say to him on their wedding night? So that's why you call it "Microsoft".
How Many Wives?
Two little boys were at a wedding when one leaned over to the other and asked, "How many wives can a man have?"
His friend answered, "Sixteen... four better, four worse, four richer, and four poorer."