Snowman Jokes

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Funniest Snowman Jokes

Funny Snowman Jokes

My 6 year old son told me this one. "What do you call a snowman that's having a threesome with two hot princesses?" I slapped my son and abruptly deleted his youtube kids app.

Why did Frosty the snowman pull down his pants? He heard the snow-blower was coming.

Why was the snowman smiling? He saw the snowblower coming.

Why was the snowman smiling? He heard the snow blower coming

What was the snowman doing in the carrot section of the grocery store? Picking his nose

What's 8 feet tall, covered in fur, and walks around the Himalayas undermining your arguments by attacking your character? The Adhomineminal Snowman

What do you call a yeti with a sixpack? The abdominable snowman

Why did the snowman smile? He heard that the snow-blower was in town.

What is the difference between snowman and snowwoman? snowballs

What was the snowman doing in the vegetable patch? Picking his nose.

Why is it quicker to build a snowman than a snowwoman? It takes too long to hollow out her head.

(I got this one from my uncle)

I made my first snowman today... It was so white it's already been nominated to Trump's Cabinet.

Why was the snowman smiling? ...he saw a snowblower coming up the street.

One snowman says to the other snowman, "do you smell carrots?"

I told my friend to stop telling jokes about the Abominable Snowman Yeti still does

Why did the snowman have a smile on his face? Because the snowblower was coming down the block.

Why was the snowman smiling? He heard the snowblower was coming.

Why was the snowman smiling? He could see the snowblower coming down the street

What's the difference between snowman and snowWoman? ...Snowballs.

Why did the snowman pull down his pants? He heard a snowblower coming.

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snow balls.

Why did frosty the snowman quit drinking? Every time he went out he got plowed.

What did one snowman say to the other snowman? I smell carrots too.

What do you call an abominable snowman who's always late? A not-yeti.

What kind of food does a Mexican snowman serve? Brrrrrritos

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwomen? What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwomen?
-
Snowballs :)

What happens when you cross a snowman and a vampire? You get a frostbite.

What does Frosty The Snowman have that Mrs. Frosty doesn't? Snowballs

(Merry Xmas)

What did one snowman say to the other snowman? Does it smell like carrots to you?

What did one snowman say to the other? Does it smell like carrots out here to you?

Co-worker just told me this one. Why is the snowman smiling? Because the snowblower is coming.

Why doesn't Frosty the Snowman wear pants? He is waiting for the snow blower to come.

How did the snowman get happy? The snowblower came around

Why did the snowman start smiling Because he saw the snow blower coming

What does a snowman have in common with an ocean? They're both bodies of water!

Jamaican Snowman What's a Jamaican snowman's favorite song? ...... Snowoman no cry.

Someone called my call center today to tell a joke I don't think I've ever heard: What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? Frostbite

What did one snowman say to the other snowman? You smell carrots?

Why was the snowman freaking out? He was having a meltdown.

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New Snowman Jokes

What's the difference between snowman and snowoman? Where you put the carrot.

What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? about 21 cents per dollar.

What do you call Frosty after he works out? The Abdominal Snowman

Why was the snowman so happy? Because the snow blower was coming

How does Frosty the Snowman go to the bathroom? That’s snowbody’s business.

What do you call a snowman with a six pack? An abdominal snowman

What did yoda tell the snowman when he found out he had tunnelvision? (OC... you can probably tell) All ICY is you!

What's the difference between a snowman and a snowlady? Snowballs.

What can cry and eat a bowl of ice cream The Sobbing Snowman

What should a snowman never ask a rabbit? Can you scratch my nose?

Who is the coolest man? A snowman

What's the difference between a snowman and snowoman ? **Snowballs**

What do you call a snowman playing piano next to the fire Melting John

What do you do to snitches in the snowman mafia? You ice em

The other day, I saw a snowman dad and snowman baby playing with the carrots in the produce section of the market... When asked, they said they are playing the "got your nose" game!

It is so cold that a snowman is cold

Why did the snowman name his dog "Frost"? Because Frost bites.

7 years ago today I pleaded with my snowman not to attempt the river crossing but he wouldn't listen and is lost to me forever. It's all water under the bridge now.

What did one snowman say to the other? Nice balls.

What did one snowman say to the other? Dude, do you smell carrots?

The difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!

What do you call a snowman with no nose? A carra-plegic

what's the diffrence between a snowman and a snowomen snowballs

What did the snowman say to the other snowman? It smells like carrots.

Where did Mr. and Mrs. Snowman go on their last vacation> Hawaii.

Turns out the abominable snowman is actually quite nice. I asked if he had something hot to drink, He answered "Yea Tea".

Why didn't the snowman eat his cereal? Because he was already feeling a little flaky.

What do you call a snowman on wheels? A bICICLE

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im so sorry...

Does a snowman have a heart? Nope, just big balls

What do you call a snowman party? A snowball.

Why was the snowman sad? Because he had a meltdown.

What did one snowman say to the other? "It smells like carrots"

What did yoda tell the snowman when he found out he had tunnel vision? All icy is you!

I legit thought of this joke when i was like 10 and im so proud i remembered it.

What do you call a snowman who has been working out at the gym? The abdominable snowman

what is the difference between snowman and snowoman? snowballs.

Whats the difference between snowman and snowwomen? Snowballs.

I prefer to do a snowwoman instead of a snowman That way I know I will make some woman wet when spring comes.

What do you call a snowman made of yellow snow? Peeter

Whats he difference between a SnowMan and a SnowWoman Snowballs

Have you guys heard of the snowman who was a comedian? His name was Bill Brrrrrrr

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Long Snowman Jokes

My dad's lame holiday joke

During the holiday season, a man is aimlessly drifting around a shopping center, wondering what to get his wife for Christmas. Wandering into a pet store, he asks the shop assistant, "Hey, buddy, you got anything with a Christmas-type theme in here?"

"Well, there is Chet, the parrot," the assistant replies.

Chet looks like any normal parrot, nothing special, so the guy asks, "What's so Christmassy about him?"

"Well, he can sing Christmas carols," says the assistant.

"Really?"

"Yup," says the assistant. "Lemme show ya. See, all ya gotta do is light a match and hold it under his left foot, like so, and Chet'll go..."

"Awrrk! Frosty the Snowman was a jolly happy soul..." Chet sings.

"Wow, that's amazing! Does he do any more?"

"Sure does! Now, if you hold the match under his right foot instead, he'll go..."

"Awrrk! Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose..." Chet sings.

Well, now the guy is really impressed, but he has to ask, "Does Chet know any more carols?"

"Oh, sure, he knows one more! See, if you hold the match BETWEEN his two feet, he goes..."

"Awrrk! Chet's nuts roasting on an open fire..."

Some Christmas jokes!

**What is the best Christmas present in the world?**

A broken drum – you just can’t beat it

**What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?**

It's Christmas, Eve!

**What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?**

Frostbite!

**Why are Christmas trees so bad at sewing?**

They always drop their needles!

**Did Rudolph go to school?**

No. He was Elf-taught!

**Who is Santa's favorite singer?**

Elf-is Presley!

**What happened to the man who stole an Advent Calendar?**

He got 25 days!

**Why does Santa have three gardens?**

So he can 'ho ho ho'!

**What does Miley Cyrus have at Christmas?**

Twerky!

**Why did Santa's helper see the doctor?**

Because he had a low "elf" esteem!

I apologize for this ahead of time

So there was this man who lived in Canada. He was bored of his work life, and it was Christmas time, so he decided to go on vacation, and he settled on Mexico. He went to Mexico, and after arriving to his hotel, he decided to ask the man behind the desk about tourist locations. The man told him about the location where people claimed to have seen the Chupacabra. He didn’t believe it, but after much convincing, he decided to go. He went there, and with his camera waited all day and night to try and find it. After much failure, he concluded that the Chupacabra was a myth. He forgot about it and decided to enjoy his vacation. Eventually he returned home, and went back to work. Finally, the summer came, and he decided he wanted to go on vacation again. Since it was summer, he decided on going to the himalayas. When he arrived, he asked someone about tourist locations, and the person suggested the location where the abominable snowman was last sighted. He felt ripped off by the Chupacabra one, but he decided to give it a try. So, putting on his gear, he hiked until he reached his location. He waited all day and night with his camera but didn’t find it. Thus, he concluded that the abominable snowman was also a myth. He enjoyed the rest of the vacation and eventually went back home, slightly disappointed. The rest of the year went by, and eventually it was summer again. He decided he was going to travel to Scotland. When he arrived to his hotel, he asked about tourist locations. The guy behind the desk told him to visit Loch Ness, because that is where the Loch Ness monster lived. The man was enraged. He was not about to get scammed again. He got angry at the man behind the desk, and so he stormed out of the hotel. He decided to ask random people about tourist locations, but every one of them suggested Loch Ness, so that he might find the Loch Ness monster. Feeling frustrated, he decided to give this one last try. He went to the Loch to prove once and for all that there was no such thing as the Loch Ness monster. He started swimming into the water, and swimming, and swimming, until he was far from shore. “See everyone, it’s a scam. It doesn’t exist!” He was feeling pleased with himself until he felt something grab his leg. He started feeling nervous. All of a sudden, he was pulled underwater. He panicked, but decided to turn and face whatever grabbed him. Lo an behold, it was the Loch Ness monster. “Oh no!” He thought. “This time I was myth-taken!”

Just some jokes I found.

Can a kangaroo jump higher than a house? Of course, a house doesn’t jump at all.

Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."

Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"

Doctor: "Nine."

A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead of going around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”

The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”

My dog used to chase people on a bike a lot. It got so bad, finally I had to take his bike away.

What is the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
-
Snowballs.


Mother, “How was school today, Patrick?”

Patrick, “It was really great mum! Today we made explosives!”

Mother, “Ooh, they do very fancy stuff with you these days. And what will you do at school tomorrow?”

Patrick, “What school?”

Mr. Toad was window shopping...

...when he saw a tiny porcelain snowman figurine that he just *had* to have. He enters the store to inquire about the price and learns that it costs much more than he can afford. Undaunted, he sets off to meet with lending officer at the bank, Mr. Paddywaque.


"No job, a dismal credit rating, a wife and 38 tadpoles to support?", says Paddywaque. "I don't think I can approve this application, Mr. Toad."


"*PLEASE*, I implore you, I MUST have this snowman! Surely, there's something you can do!", said Mr. Toad.


Paddywaque gives in to his client's pleading and agrees to show the application to his manager, Mr. ....uumm.....Jones.


Jones, terribly busy at the moment and not wanting to be bothered, takes a quick glance over his glasses at the application and says...

"It's a knick knack Paddywaque, give the frog a loan!"

short jokes

I have gotten some good jokes from yall... I hope yall enjoy these
Sorry no Easter jokes if you celebrate Easter or anything like that... have a good one

Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A. He wanted cold hard cash!

Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A. Frostbite.

Q. Where do polar bears vote?
A. The North Poll

Q. What dog keeps the best time?
A. A watch dog.

Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?
A. It let out a little wine!

Q. How do you make a tissue dance?
A. Put a little boogey in it!

Q. What did the water say to the boat?
A. Nothing, it just waved.

Q. What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?
A. Dam!

Snowman puns to celebrate the snowstorm in my area

What do vampires get when they bite snowmen?
"Frostbite"

What is a snowman's favorite cereal?
"Snowflakes"

Why didn't the snowman answer the question?
"He didn't snow the answer"

What does a snowman like to ride?
"An icicle"

How can you tell a snowman is angry at you?
"You get the cold shoulder... or an icy stare"

Master list of dad jokes

Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? Because she’ll “Let It Go”!

What do you call cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese!

How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it

What do you get when a witch goes to the beach? A sand-witch!

Where do cows go on Friday nights? To the mooooo-vies!

What did the mommy tomato say to the baby tomato? C’mon, ketchup!

Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because he wasn’t “peeling” well!

What did one snowman say to the other? Do you smell carrots?

Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no body to go with!

What is a pirate’s favorite letter? Arrrrrr!

What does a piece of toast wear to bed? His pa-JAM-as!

What does one eye say to the other eye? Something between us smells

Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide!

What happens when an egg laughs? It cracks up!

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

Why didn’t the teddy bear want dessert? Because he was stuffed!

Why can’t you tell a joke while ice skating? Because the ice might crack up!

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop!

What’s mommy and daddy’s favorite ride at the carnival? A married-go-round!

How did Cookie Monster feel after eating all the cookies? Pretty crummy!

What do you call a skunk who flies in a helicopter? A smelly-copter!

What do you get when you shake a cow? A milkshake!

How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!

Why did the bee get married? Because she found her honey!

What did the ocean say to their airplane? Nothing, it just waved!

Where do eskimo pigs live? In pig-loos.

What’s a dinosaur called when it’s sleeping? A dino-snore!

What did the cookie say to the annoying cookie? Crumb on!

Why did Mickey Mouse go up in space? To find Pluto!

What does Olaf eat for lunch? Icebergers!

What letter is always wet? The C!

Stupid Q & A Jokes

Q. Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

A. He wanted cold hard cash!


Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

A. "Is that you mommy?"


Q. What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

A. Frostbite.


Q. How do crazy people go through the forest?

A. They take the psycho path.


Q. What do prisoners use to call each other?

A. Cell phones.


Q. What do you get from a pampered cow?

A. Spoiled milk.


Q. Where do polar bears vote?

A. The North Poll


Q. What did Geronimo say when he jumped out of the airplane?

A. ME!!!


Q. Where do snowmen keep their money?

A. In snow banks.


Q. What's brown and sticky?

A. A stick.


Q. Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?

A. Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!


Q. What dog keeps the best time?

A. A watch dog.


Q. Why did the tomato turn red?

A. It saw the salad dressing!


Q. What did the grape do when it got stepped on?

A. It let out a little wine!


Q. How do you make a tissue dance?

A. Put a little boogey in it!


Q. Where do bees go to the bathroom?

A. At the BP station!


Q. What did the judge say when the skunk walked in the court room?

A. Odor in the court.

Seasonal Jokes

Spring
Q: If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?
A: Pilgrims!
Summer
Q: What do you call a dog on the beach in the Summer?
A: A hot dog!
Q: Why do bananas use sunscreen?
A: Because they peel.
Fall
Q. How you mend a broken pumpkin?
A. With a pumpkin patch!
Winter
Q: How do Eskimos make their beds?
A: With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
Q: Why don’t mountains get cold in the winter?
A: They wear snowcaps.
Q: What did the snowman say to the customer?
A: Have an ice day!
Q: What do you call a slow skier?
A: A slopepoke!
Q: Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?
A: Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
Q: Where does a polarbear keep its money?
A: In a snow bank!
Q: What do you call a snowman in the desert?
A: A puddle!
Q: How does an Eskimo stick his house together?
A: With igloo!
Q: What is a snowman’s favorite breakfast?
A: Frosted Flakes!
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Snow.
Snow who?
Snowbody!

Idiot question and answer

Q: On which side does a chicken have the most feathers?
A: The outside.

Q: How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed?
A: Your nose touches the ceiling.

Q: What’s a flea’s favorite way to travel?
A: Itch-hiking.

Q: Why did the snowman call his dog Frost?
A: Because Frost bites.

I've always loved making snowmen

I've always loved making snowmen. It's really a lot of fun, but it's also pretty sad knowing that no matter how good they are, they'll always melt when it warms up again. Only the other day I was walking along happily and I stumbled upon the melted remains of not just one snowman but what seemed to be dozens of snowmen. Clearly a family had spent the day building them all, no doubt enjoying themselves the whole time. I'm sure at one point these snowmen looked amazing but now the heat had reduced them to nothing. I'm not going to lie, I started to get pretty emotional... well, until I realized I was just standing in a carrot field.

One snowman is under a tree, holding a red lightsaber,

another, is in the sun, holding a green lightsaber,

Red snowman: Come to the dark side.

Green snowman: Why? all you do is terrorise people!

Red snowman: Dude, we're snowmen, the dark side; under the tree..

Green snowman: Oh! Okay.

Red snowman mumbling: Stupid..

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