Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he uses only the highest-quality ingredients.
I have the eyes of a hawk, the heart of a lion, the ears of a fox And a lifetime ban from the zoo.
A black man, a Muslim, and a Communist walk into a bar...
The bartender says, "Hello, Mr. President!"
Courtesy of my Fox News-watching mom...
Dear Fox News.....
I have yet to see any news about foxes.
Sincerely, Disappointed viewer.....
What's the difference between a Shakespeare comedy and Fox News? One's The Taming of the Shrew, the other is the shaming of the true.
James Bond walks into a bar...
James Bond walks into a bar.
Michael J. Fox is the bartender.
James Bond says "I'll have a martini."
He does not need to specify.
Two blondes are in the woods looking at a set of tracks.
"They're wolf tracks," says the first.
"No way! Those are fox tracks!" Exclaims the second.
The two fight back and forth so loud they didn't hear the train coming.
how come Michael J. Fox can make such good milkshakes? because he is rich and can afford high quality ingredients!..
I needed to have some white noise on in the background to help me fall asleep Fox News seemed to do the trick.
FOX new has saved my legs! I got into a terridle car crash and and lost the use of my legs. When I was in the hospital, FOX news came on the TV. I got up to change the channel.
How does Fox News greet it’s watchers? “Good afternoon folks, I hope you’ve been doing alt-right!”
Pretty sure I saw Michael J Fox at the garden center this morning, it certainly looked like him.. But he had his back to the fuchsia....
General Mathis served in the marines for 44 years and John Dowd was a JAG for a few years
# Jagass !!
*(No offence to the honest, decent JAGS and this is from a post I saw on fox forums)*
Daring the hottest girl in the city reminds me of Fox News... ...when she tries to tell me stories, all I can see is holes.
Fox News is reporting President Trump's polling at an all-time low.... ...with only a 108% approval rating.
What kind of Fox is most at risk from Covid 19? Micheal J. Because hand shakes are dangerous.
Ben Shapiro's Doctor Wife had to perform oral surgery on him. The fox don't care about his fillings.
Michael J Fox grabs a soda...
His friend says: “You never drink those.”
Michael replies: “I just figured I’d shake things up”
What would the headline be if Barack Obama walked on water across a lake in full view of a Fox News reporter? "OBAMA CAN'T SWIM"
Why Did The Parents Let Terry Fox Date Their Daughter? Because they knew he wouldn't go all the way!
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a long one. Michael J. Fox has a short one. Madonna does not have one. The Pope does not really use his. And Justin Bieber always uses his. What is it? A last name
Dr. Marc Siegel said the coronavirus was nothing to worry about on Fox News yesterday. I’m not usually one for misinformation, but if fox viewers want to stop washing their hands, I say go for it.
Just saw Micheal J Fox in the local garden centre At least I think it was him - he had his back to the fuchsias.
What's the difference between a dead fox on the road and a dead Donald Trump on the road? There are skid marks in front of the fox.
What happens when you combine Fox News, CNN, and a Fleshlight.
You get a plane
The right wing, the left wing, and the cockpit.
Why can the fox from Dora the Explorer not open his new iPhone? Because "Swiper no swiping, Swiper no swiping, Swiper no swiping"
The National Geographic Channel has been bought up by Rupert Murdoch's Fox media empire. From now on they'll mostly be showing documentaries about how migratory birds come over here and take all our worms.
Fox has just announced they have canceled Empire I hope Jussie Smollett doesn’t beat himself up over it.
Trump walks into a bar...The barman asks "How's it going?" Trump says "I don't know, Fox hasn't told me yet:
A Banker, a Fox News fan and a welfare recipient are at a table sharing 12 cookies... The banker takes 11 cookies and says to the Fox News fan: "Watch out for the welfare guy, he wants your cookie!".
Interrupting Fox who?