Helen Keller once described a cheese grater as... "The most violent book I have ever read"
Trump wants to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese. He wants to make America grate again.
What do they call the Hunger Games in France? Battle Royale with Cheese.
A bomb just went off in a paris cheese shop There is de brie everywhere!
What happened when the cheese factory exploded? De brie went everywhere
I ate at Mary Poppin's Restaurant last night... Super cauliflower cheese but the lobster was atrocious
Two cheese trucks ran into each other De brie was everywhere.
It is my first time in court and I heard the judge shouting, "Order!!" So I replied fried chicken, mac and cheese and cola. Now I'm being escorted out by two officers. I think we are going to a restaurant.
What did Helen Keller say when she picked up the cheese grater? That was the most violent book I've ever read...........
I think we should ban pre-shredded cheese. Make America grate again.
Helen Keller....... Helen Keller once described a cheese grater as "The most violent book I've ever read".
Did you know Donald Trump is banning pre-shredded cheese? TO MAKE MERICA GRATE AGAIN
My kid made this one up: How do you make Swiss cheese? With a holey cow.
What did Ray Charles say when they handed him a cheese grater? This is the most violent thing I've ever read.
Shredded cheese has officially been banned in grocery stores in the US. Trump will make America grate again.
Did you hear about Stevie Wonder getting a cheese grater for his birthday? He said it was the most violent book he'd ever read.
Which cheese is made backwards?
My girlfriend is in the hospital after she ate a giant bacon cheese burger. It was mine.
Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? All that was left was de-Brie.
Once I saw a blind man touching a cheese grater at Ikea. He said: "who wrote this bullshit"
Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages. They are calling it the wurst käse scenario.
Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese factory? Apparently people were covered in debris.
I had a job where I had to put shredded cheese back together It was the most degrating job I've ever had.
Donald Trump is introducing a 30% tax on shredded cheese. It's part of his plan to Make America Grate Again.
I bought my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. A week later, he told me it was the most violent book he’d ever read.
Did you hear about the cheese truck that crashed? The street was littered with de brie
Did you hear about that French cheese factory that exploded? There was nothing left but de brie.
Sweet dreams are made of cheese... Who am I to diss a brie?
Cheese shop exploded Thankfully I was only hit by da brie
A man just assaulted me with milk and cheese How dairy
Big explosion at the cheese factory earlier.... There was de brie everywhere.
What do you call an anorexic girl that has a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese.
Why don't old men eat out their old wives? Have you ever tried to pull apart a grilled cheese?
Did you hear about the explosion at the cheese shop in France? The area was covered in De Brie...
You know what they call Fortnite in America? They call it a quarter battle with cheese.
The best way to eat Welsh cheese? Caerphilly.
What do they call the Hunger Games in Japan? Battle Royale with cheese
A detective walks into a party...
and asks the partygoers,
"Do you guys have any Nacho Cheese?"
The partygoers respond,
"No dip, Sherlock."
I walked up to the register at the ball park with a question. If it’s NAH- CHO cheese, then whose is it?
Why do scrap salvagers like cheese so much? Because they sort through de-brie to earn some cheddar.
Cheese has magical properties for the lactose intolerant, we turn into Oscar Pistorious... ... and run to the bathroom in the middle of the night.
What are the similarities between vegan cheese and female celebrity? They’re both full of plastic.
Illinois has corn, Wisconsin has cheese, what does Michigan have? Lead poisoning.
What does the cross between a narcissist and cheese say? I am the GRATEST!!
5yo me, getting ready to chow down on mac and cheese, smells it before I take a bite. To which my Grandfather speaks up, "Do you smell everything before you eat it?"
Me: "Yeah, grandpa!"
Grandpa: "Boy, that's gonna put a real hamper on your love life!"
Hey! You hear about that French cheese factory that blew up? They say there was nothing left but de Brie.
My friend dropped his favorite corn chip into a vat of melted cheese. "Aw, man," I sympathized, "It's just nacho day."
What is Magnus Carlsen's favorite cheese? Goat cheese.
What did the duck say to the cheese grader. nothing ducks can't talk
So I ate at Mary Poppin’s restaurant last night... Super cauliflower cheese but the lobster was atrocious.
What’s the difference between cheese and girls? Cheese becomes better with age
A black slave escaped with a wheel of cheese. The owner was being interviewed by southern law enforcement where he asked: "will you be able to find him?" Which the officer replied: Can't say but one things for sure, he Nacho Negro.
President Erdogan has won Turkish cheese maker of the year. He excels at getting the curds out of the whey.
Guys, I just want to let you all know... I really love spicy cheese dip! K, so?
I had my first interview for a cheese company I think it went grate
There was an explosion at a French cheese factory earlier today Officials say theres nothing but de brie left.
What's pārmēsān? Macrony cheese
Did you hear about the shop that just opened in India that sells fresh meat and cheese? It's a new deli.
I can't believe exterminators get money from killing rats. I killed a rat once and got a lifetime ban from Chuck-E-Cheese's.
I know an insane fact about cheese. You won’t brie-lieve it.
You know what they cal a fortnite with cheese in paris Battle royale with cheese
How do you conceal a cheese loving horse? Mask a Pony
What's the most popular sandwich at cafes in Jurassic Park? Dr. Hammond cheese
I jist saw two cheese trucks run into each other! Debrie was everywhere.
What's the difference between an Italian dessert cheese and a small pony who loves makeup? Ones a mascarpone, ones a mascara pony
I was at the supermarket today and saw a man running out of the door, a bag full of cheese, being chased by security guards. How dairy.
What kind of cheese do elderly people like to eat? Mature cheddar
What did the cop say to the dairy thief? Stop! That's nacho cheese!
[OC] How do you know if someone's kicked a cheese too hard? They lactose.
The Kardashians are all in a rocket set to launch, you can press a button to stop the launch. Would you order a cheese or pepperoni pizza?
You know what they call the Hunger Games in Japan? Battle Royale with Cheese.
How do the Welsh eat cheese? Caerphilly
Big explosion down at the Cheese factory today... I guess it completely leveled the place, All that was left was Da Brie.
Uh, hi. Yeah, I'll have a six-inch Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki on Honey Oat, please. No, thanks, no double meat or cheese. Yeah, lettuce, tomato, cucumber, banana peppers, and..." *checks phone* Oh, shoot. Wrong sub.
Thank god Green Bay is known for their cheese. The fudge packers just doesn't have the same ring.
If I had to pick a food as a sophisticated best friend, it'd be cheese cuz cheese is so cultured. Original joke. I'm sure if it's funny though..
What was the cheese dip's reply when Chip said Salsa was his best friend? K, so?
What is a Princess with a yeast infection called in France? A royal with cheese