Spanish Jokes

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Funniest Spanish Jokes

My neighbour's 4-year-old has been learning Spanish since lockdown. He still can't say "please" though, which I think is poor for four.

People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain. Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

Funny Spanish Jokes

I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football. Nobody expects the Spanish in position.

Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice? The Spanish Inquisition.

If you see a Spanish person tell them "mucho" It means a lot to them

Who wears a red suit, and knows if you are naughty or nice? The Spanish Inquisition

I think my family is racist I've been nervous for weeks, but I finally decided to introduce them to my Spanish girlfriend

My kids refused to talk to her and my wife started crying and told me to pack my things

My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Everyone seemed surprised. Nobody expects the Spanish Acquisition


Edit: expects*

What do you call a group of confused Spanish speaking racists? The ¿Qué Qué Qué?

My uncle runs a clinic inside a hotel in Spain He come out late at night to ring people's doorbells.

Because nobody suspects The Spanish Inn Physician

People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Madrid. Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.

Spanish Dad Joke Dad: Son what are you drinking?

Son: Soy Milk

Dad: Hola Milk, me llamo Dad

My Spanish teacher taught me the word for "Transgender" I asked him if the word is masculine or feminine

What is the longest word in the Spanish language? Goooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllll

My company got bought out by a Madrid based firm today. Really blind-sided everyone. Nobody expected the Spanish Acquisition.

People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain Nobody ever expects the Spanish ink precision.

People are always amazed at the skilled tattoo artists in Spain. No one expects the Spanish ink precision

A cop pulled over a spanish photon... The cop asked, "Do you know how fast you were going?"

The photon said, "c."

Whenever I'm asked "What happened in 1492?", people are always surprised by my answer. Nobody expects "The Spanish Inquisition".

In a huge lecture hall once I only had four international students turn up - English, French, Spanish and German. I asked if they could all see me. They said... Yes, Oui, Si, Ja

So my Spanish teacher told me to turn in my essay I told her I ain't no snitch

I saw a Spanish magician last night.. he said "uno, dos.." And then he disappeared without a tres

My 4-year-old nephew has been learning Spanish since lockdown. He can’t say ‘please’ which I think is poor for four

"Uno, dos..." And just like that, the Spanish magician was gone without a tres.

Tattoos People are amazed at how good the tattoo artists are in Spain........
They weren't expecting the Spanish ink precision

A Spanish magician was showing a trick.. "For my next trick, I'll disappear into thin air. Uno, dos."

And he vanished without a tres!

People never believe me when I tell them that I got my incredibly detailed tattoo in Spain. Nobody expects the spanish ink precision

Have you heard the story of the Spanish magician? He was on stage one day and said "Uno...dos..." and then he disappeared without a tres.

A blonde tells her friend "I completed a jigsaw puzzle in record time!"

"No way! How long did it take you?" Replied her friend

"6 months"

"That cannot be a record time!'

" Well the box said from 1 to 3 years"

Sorry for bad English, original was in Spanish

My friend is so rich He thought Manual labor was a Spanish musician

What do you call a spanish child molester? A Pedrophile.

A spanish magician ... A spanish magician gets on stage and says "I will disappear in 3 seconds." He counts: "Uno, Dos." And he disappeared without a tres.

A Spanish magician is at a party He begins his trick for the birthday girl, grabbing a handful of magic sprinkle dust. He then begins to count, "uno, dos," POOF.

He disappeared without a tres.

I recently bought a copy of Monty Python's Big Red Book, but was later dismayed to find that I'd purchased the Spanish language version... Nobody expects the Spanish text edition.

A Spanish magician told the crowd he'll make himself vanish on the count of 3. He goes "Uno, dos... And *Poof*..... He disappeared without a tres.

I used to have a Spanish girlfriend called Nada She meant nothing to me

I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at soccer. Nobody expects the Spanish in position.

A Spanish magician tells the audience he is going to disappear on the count of 3 He says uno, dos... then POOF, he disappears without a tres

I'd like to thank my Spanish teacher for spending so much time teaching me what mucho means It really means a lot

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New Spanish Jokes

My neighbours 4yr old son has been learning Spanish during lockdown, but still can’t say please. Which I think is poor for four.

My mother in law is Spanish My mother in law is Spanish, so when we named our son 'Muchos' it really meant a lot to her.

"And for my final act," said the Spanish Magician, "I will DISAPPEAR! Uno, dos..." And he vanished without a tres.

I’ve been helping teach my 4 year old Spanish during lockdown And he doesn’t know the word for please, which I think is poor for four

A joke translated from Spanish that I heard in Guatemala What are 3 things that testicles and Mormons have in common?

1. They always travel in pairs.
2. One is always bigger than the other.
3. They knock, but never enter.

What did the Spanish radio host say after broadcast? Audios

In New York there are many tattoo artists from all over the world, but for some reason the artists from Spain have trouble getting business. Why? Because nobody expects the Spanish ink precision!

Rap must seem very egocentric to Spanish people... "Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo!"

I always say el mundo to my Spanish friend It means the world to him

A spanish magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then *poof* … he disappeared without a tres

My dad told me this one What do you call a Spanish soldier lying in a field?

Gracias

*And his own addition he’s very proud of:*

What do you call 50 Spanish soldiers lying in a field?

Muchos gracias

I always say mucho to my Spanish friends It means alot to them

My four year old nephew started learning Spanish during lockdown I asked him if he could tell me what the Spanish for please was and he couldn't, which I think is poor for four

A Spanish greengrocer is 1.74 meters tall, has a waist circumference of 105 centimeters, and wears a size of 44. What does he weigh? Vegetables

What do English speakers yell when they're on a rollercoaster? Weeeeeeeeeeee!!!!

What do Spanish speakers yell when they're on a roller coaster?

Nosotros!!!!!

french and spanish are opposites French be like: le hon hon hon


Mexicans be like: el noh noh noh

I’ve been saying mucho to my Spanish friend lately It means a lot to him

Then the duck walked up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running, “hey” (bom bom bom) “you never expect the spanish inquisition“

We should say “mucho” to all spanish speakers in this sub it means a lot to them for sure.

What did the pig say to the spanish butcher? Porque

Mick Jagger and Keith Richards have a huge falling out after Mick refuses to stop talking in broken Spanish When asked for comment, Mick replied "The Rolling Stones gather no mas."

A Spanish Magician says he will count to 3 and disappear. "Uno, Dos" and he disappeared without a tres.

Did you hear its now illegal to be in possession of a ballpoint pen in Spain? That's the Spanish ink-position.

Chuck Norris just put up a new sign outside his house... It says 'Welcome, Spanish Inquisition!'

I was going to make a joke about the Spanish capital... ... maybe about their football team.

But what's the point? The Real Madrid joke will be in the comments.

Spanish pigs say "oinc-oinc". French pigs say "Oinque"

Japanese pigs say "Oinku"

American pigs say "STOP RESISTING"

My Spanish girlfriend wanted a better TV So I arrived home and set it up.

Turns out she said Por Que instead of 4K.

if koren pop if koren pop is kpop then what is chinese rap and spanish hits

The Spanish Magician A Spanish magician says he will disappear on the count of 3.


"Uno, dos, poof."


He disappeared without a tres.

What do you call a crazy Spanish train driver's reason to commit murder ? A Loco-motive!

An Italian, an American and a Spanish guy walk into a bar Shouldn't have done that, now they all got corona

My dad is moving to a Spanish city Ciudad

My Jamaican buddy is dating a Spanish chick. He doesn't like her granddad, Juan... But he does like Hernando.

People always ask me where I learnt my excellent penmanship, but never believe me when I tell them Spain. I guess nobody expects the Spanish Ink Precision.

I failed my Spanish language exam. Sacre bleu

Ha! You were expecting a well thought out Joke! But no... Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

What moisturizer do Spanish bullfighters use? OLAY

My dad got kidnapped in a Spanish city Ciudad

My friends mom counted over two in Spanish and died. You could say it was an Overdos.

Donald Trump refers to the Coronavirus as the “Chinese Virus” because... ... he’s had enough of the Spanish Flu

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Long Spanish Jokes

"Un, deux, trois, quatre", radioed the French ship...

...before it cinq.

"Eins, zwei, drei", radioed the German ship vierlessly, but then silence.

"Uno, dos", radioed the Spanish ship, and then disappeared without a tres.

"One," radioed the British ship before it went two.

"Won," radioed the American sub.

A list of puns

Here's a list of puns I've been collecting:

How do you throw a space party? You planet.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

Nope. Unintended.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention, but everyone was blow away by the leaf blower.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

The broom swept the nation away.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What does a clock do when it's hungry? It goes back for seconds.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels can’t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says “Do you smell fish?”

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in france? There was nothing but des brie.

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, it’s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldn’t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didn’t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hurdles, but I got over it.

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

I read a book on anti-gravity. I couldn’t put it down.

I couldn’t remember how to throw a boomerang but it came back to me.

What did the buffalo say to his son? Bison.

What should you do if you’re cold? Stand in the corner. It’s 90 degrees.

How does Moses make coffee? Hebrews it.

The energizer bunny went to jail. He was charged with battery.

What did the alien say to the pitcher of water? Take me to your liter.

What happens when you eat too many spaghettiOs? You have a vowel movement.

The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.

Sausage puns are the wurst.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

How did Darth Vader know what luke was getting him for his birthday? He could sense his presence.

Why shouldn’t you trust atoms? They make up everything.

What’s the difference between a bench, a fish, and a bucket of glue? You can’t tune a bench but you can tuna fish. I bet you got stuck on the bucket of glue part.

What’s it called when you have too many aliens? Extraterrestrials.

Want to hear a pizza joke? Nevermind, it’s too cheesy.

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

What do cows tell each other at bedtime? Dairy tales.

Why can’t you take inventory in Afghanistan? Because of the tally ban.

Why didn’t the lion win the race? Because he was racing a cheetah.

Why did the man dig a hole in his neighbor’s backyard and fill it with water? Because he meant well.

What happens to nitrogen when the sun comes up? It becomes daytrogen.

What’s it called when you put a cow in an elevator? Raising the steaks.

What’s america’s favorite soda? Mini soda.

Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.

What kind of car does a sheep drive? A lamborghini, but if that breaks down they drive their SuBAHHru.

What do you call a spanish pig? Porque.

What do you call a line of rabbits marching backwards? A receding hairline.

Why don’t vampires go to barbecues? They don’t like steak.

A cabbage and celery walk into a bar and the cabbage gets served first because he was a head.

How do trees access the internet? They log on.

Why should you never trust a train? They have loco motives.

A British man, a French man and a Spanish man are caught stealing in a foreign country.

They are prosecuted and the judge sentences them all to 100 lashes each. However he wants to look lenient in the eyes of their respective countries so he reduces the lashes to twenty and allows them to have two requests each before being lashed.

The Spanish is first to be lashed and requests a bottle of tequila and a pillow strapped to his back. They let him drink the tequila and strap the pillow to his back and then commence the lashes. After 5 lashes the pillow breaks and they keep lashing him. After the 20 lashes he's bawling and his back is horribly scared. They haul him away to be sent back to Spain.

The French man is next and he requests two pillows (one per request). After 10 lashes the pillows break and they continue with the next 10. By the end he's also horribly scarred and bawling, but not as bad as the Spanish guy.

While they are hauling off the French guy the judge turns to the Brit and says "Well it's your turn now. What do you request?"

The British man responds "First I want the original punishment of 100 lashes. I don't believe I should get off easy."

The Judge yells "You're crazy! why would you do that?"

The Brit responds "Because my next request is to have the French man strapped to my back."

While on vacation in Spain with my wife..

I I started to feel funny. I had some pain in my chest and felt short of breath. I chalked it up to the long day we had just had, but I continued to feel worse. As we got out of the taxi and walked into the hotel, I collapsed.

It became apparent to my wife and I that I was having a heart attack. I thought for sure I would die because the nearest hospital was 1/2 hour away. Suddenly from the back room came a woman wielding defibrillators. She shouted to the other staff to help and they ripped off my shirt and restarted my heart right there in the hotel.

The ambulance arrived 20 minutes later, but thanks to this amazing woman my life had been saved. I spent the night in the hospital but I got out around noon the next day. I went back to the hotel to thank this woman.

I said, “I’m amazed that a hotel this small has a full time doctor as skilled as yourself!”

She replied, “No one expects the Spanish Inn physician.”

The Spanish assassin

There was once a hitman who was known for his skill and stealth. Nobody really knew his identity, except for the fact that he always used to count to three before shooting his victim.

One time, a mob leader wanted a hit on a rival leader, so he hired him. He said "I want the kill to be clean, leave no trace. And since I'm a big fan of your legend, I'd like to be there when you assassinate the target". The assassin agrees.

With carefully planned tactics, the assassin infiltrates the rival gang on the pretence of capturing the mob leader.
Finally, in the room with the mob leader and the rival leader, the assassin aims his pistol at the target and counts.

\*uno\*

\*dos\*

\*BANG\*

The rival drops dead.

"But I thought you count to three", said the mob leader.
"Sí" replied the assassin. "But you said leave no tres".

*****

EDIT: Formatting

An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German are watching a street performer.

The performer suddenly realizes that these men have a poor view so he gets on a small platform. "Can you all see me now?" He asks them.
"Yes"
"Oui"
"Sí"
"Ja"

Edit: changed accent on the Spanish word

A Spanish man who spoke no English went into a department store...

A Spanish man who spoke no English went into a department store to buy socks. He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him.

"Quiero calcetines" said the man.

"I don't speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here." said the salesgirl.

"No, no quiero trajes. Quiero calcetines." said the man.

"Well, these shirts are on sale this week." declared the salesgirl.

"No, no quiero camisas. Quiero calcetines." repeated the man.

"I still don't know what you're trying to say. We have some fine pants on this rack." offered the salesgirl.

"No, no quiero pantalones. Quiero calcetines." insisted the man.

"These sweaters are top quality." the salesgirl probed.

"No, no quiero sueter. Quiero calcetines." said the man.

"Our undershirts are over here." fumbled the salesgirl, beginning to lose patience.

"No, no quiero camisetas. Quiero calcetines." the man repeated.

As they passed the underwear counter, the man spotted a display of socks and happily grabbed a pair. Holding them up he proclaimed "Eso sí que es!".

"Well, if you could spell it, why didn't you do that in the beginning?" asked the exasperated salesgirl.

A German girl married a Spanish man & went to Spain..

She can't speak Spanish. Each time she wants to buy chicken legs, she would lift her skirt & show her thighs to enable the seller understand her... This went on for sometime. One day, she wanted to buy banana, so she took her husband to the shop..

Because her husband speaks Spanish very well.

4 people go on vacation together.

One of them speaks English, another speaks French, the third speaks Spanish , and the last speaks German. They see a crowd gathering in the street and go over to see what’s going on. There is a performer in the middle of the crowd. He notices that the four are struggling to see him so he stands on a box. He asks them “ can you guys see me all right?” And they reply in turn “yes” “oui” “si” “ja”.

A man is staying at an old fashioned pub/inn

Downstairs in the tavern he is drinking before retiring to his room. The innkeep approaches him and proposes a challenge. He has a magical chicken that will grant him one wish if he can beat her in a trivia contest. The man is bemused but accepts the challenge, figuring there’s no harm in indulging him.

The man brings out the hen from the back room. The innkeep explains that she only speaks Spanish, but he will translate. The man also speaks Spanish so they decide to have the contest in Spanish.

They begin the trivia battle and the chicken wins decisively. The hen speaks perfectly Spanish and answers every question accurately. The man is blown away, a little disappointed not to get his wish but deciding that the novelty of a genius talking chicken was worth the time anyway. He tells in the innkeep about how he didn’t anticipate having such an interesting evening.

The innkeeper laughs and says

“No one expects the Spanish Inn quiz wish hen.”

A bilingual joke! (English/Spanish)

A Spanish man goes into a department store looking for a specific item of clothing. But he can't find what he's looking for and he doesn't know the English word for it.

So he grabs a salesperson and says, "Tienes calcetines?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know what that is," the salesperson says.

The guy tries again. "Medias?" He asks, miming pulling up socks. The salesperson brings him to the trouser section.

"No, no quiero pantalones. Quiero medias, calcetines," he says.

And so it goes for nearly an hour. Finally, almost by accident, the salesperson leads him to the sock section.

The Spanish guy, excited, points and shouts, "Eso sí que es!"

The salesperson's jaw drops and he says, "Well, why didn't you TELL me you knew how to spell it?"

An American man, a French man, a Spanish man and a German man are standing on the sidewalk, trying to watch a street performer juggle bowling pins.

The juggler notices they're having a bit of trouble, so he stands on a large wooden box and says to them, "Can you see me now?"

They answer one at a time:

"Yes."

"Oui."

"Sí."

"Ja."

a boy was asked to think of three good quotes at school

he went home and asked his mother, she said “a fool and his money are soon parted”

he asked his father, he said “ask and you shall receive”

he asked his grandfather, who served the military, he said, “where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is proved”

he went back to school, where he coincidentally was tasked to perform a bake sale. his teacher walked by and he chanced upon this opportunity to tell his teacher the three quotes, the teacher bought a cupcake and the boy said, “a fool and his money are soon parted”

in rage, the teacher got angry and said, “i want to send you to the principals office” he then replied, “ask and you shall receive”

at the principals office, he was told by him that he will be punished if he does not stop such behaviour, the boy finally replied, “where the battle rages, there the loyalty of the soldier is tested”



much to everyone’s surprise the spanish inquisition arrived

A Spanish walked into a department store....

A Spanish man who spoke no English went into a department store to buy socks. He found his way to the menswear department where a young lady offered to help him.
"Quiero calcetines" said the man.
"I don't speak Spanish, but we have some very nice suits over here." said the salesgirl.
"No, no quiero trajes. Quiero calcetines." said the man.
"Well, these shirts are on sale this week." declared the salesgirl.
"No, no quiero camisas. Quiero calcetines." repeated the man.
"I still don't know what you're trying to say. We have some fine pants on this rack." offered the salesgirl.
"No, no quiero pantalones. Quiero calcetines." insisted the man.
"These sweaters are top quality." the salesgirl probed.
"No, no quiero sueter. Quiero calcetines." said the man.
"Our undershirts are over here." fumbled the salesgirl, beginning to lose patience.
"No, no quiero camisetas. Quiero calcetines." the man repeated.
As they passed the underwear counter, the man spotted a display of socks and happily grabbed a pair. Holding them up he proclaimed "Eso sí que es!".
"Well, if you could spell it, why didn't you do that in the beginning?" asked the exasperated salesgirl.

A Brit, Frenchman and a Spanish bloke are arrested for theft in a foreign country.

They are brought before a judge and the judge sentences them all to 100 lashes each. However he wants to look lenient in the eyes of their respective countries so he reduces the lashes to twenty and allows them to have two requests each before being lashed.

The Spanish is first to be lashed and requests a bottle of tequila and a pillow strapped to his back. They let him drink the tequila and strap the pillow to his back and then commence the lashes. After 5 lashes the pillow breaks and they keep lashing him. After the 20 lashes he's bawling and his back is horribly scared. They haul him away to be sent back to Spain.

The French man is next and he requests two pillows (one per request). After 10 lashes the pillows break and they continue with the next 10. By the end he's also horribly scarred and bawling, but not as bad as the Spanish guy.

While they are hauling off the French guy the judge turns to the Brit and says "Well it's your turn now. What do you request?"

The British man responds "First I want the original punishment of 100 lashes. I don't believe I should get off easy."

The Judge yells "You're crazy! why would you do that?"

The Brit responds "Because my next request is to have the Frenchman strapped to my back."

I was at the mall with my friend looking for a 'Learn to speak Spanish' book. [apologies in advance for what I hope is OC]

My friend speaks Spanish fluently and he is great with numbers so we were looking for cheap books when we came to the table that advertised, 5 books for the price of 3. I found the books we needed on another table and surprised when I saw the same offer.

"Oh Look, 5 for 3 too Juan."

[Again, sorry. I tried. :) I was going to work 'sticks' and 7 ate 9 into it but have a go yourself. ]

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat.

As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman he ever saw boarding the plane.

He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out,

"Business trip or pleasure?"

She turned, smiled and said,

"Business."

I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."

He swallowed hard.

Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked,

"What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," she responded.

"I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really?" he said.

"And what kind of myths are there?" "

"Well", she explained,

"One popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait.

"Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers, when actually it is men of Spanish descent who are the best.

I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed.

"I'm sorry," she said,

"I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't even know your name..."

"Tonto," the man said ,

"Tonto Gonzalez, but my friends call me Bubba."

Thanos came to Earth in 2023

seeking the six Infinity Stones. As he sat on a rock, waiting for his underlings to bring the Stones to him, three strange men arrived in front of him, seemingly out of nowhere. One wore a red cape, another bore a red shield, the third was clad in a red suit. They fought, and it was a bloody battle, but Thanos was mighty, and eventually took control of the gauntlet which housed the Stones.

As he shaped to snap his fingers, Thanos smiled, and slowly declared:

"I - am - inevitable."

Nothing happened.

With a look of shock on his face, Thanos watched as the man in the red suit lifted his right hand, revealing the real Infinity Stones.

"And we - ", said the man in the red suit, "are...

... the Spanish Inquisition."

And nobody, not even Thanos, expects the Spanish Inquisition.

An english man, french, israeli, spanish and german are watching a street performance. The performer stands on a box and asks," Can you see me?"

The english answers" Yes"

The french answers"we"

The israeli answers "ken"

The spanish answers "si"

The german answers" ya"

My Wife and I went to Spain.

The other week I went to Barcelona for a vacation with my wife. We stayed at a small local hotel about 30 minutes from the city. The first day we had a great time going around las ramblas and going taking pictures at La Sagrada familia. That night we even attended a Barcelona game against Real Madrid. It was a great game, but unfortunately ended in a draw. We took a taxi back to the hotel, but on the way I started to feel funny. I had some pains in my chest and felt short of breath. I chalked it up to the long day I had just had, but I continued to feel worse. As we got out of the taxi and walked into the hotel, I collapsed. It became apparent to my wife and I that I was having a heart attack! I thought for sure I would die because the nearest hospital was 1/2 hour away. Suddenly from the back room came a woman wielding defibrillators. She shouted to the other staff to help and they ripped off my shirt and restarted my heart right there in the hotel! The ambulance arrived 20 minutes later, but thanks to this amazing woman my life had been saved. I spent the night in the hospital but I got out around noon the next day. I went back to the hotel to thank this woman. I said “I’m amazed that a hotel this small has a full time doctor as skilled as yourself!” She replied “no one expects the Spanish inn physician.”

credit to u/ClintonHarvey for the pun

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