Hilarious Midget Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Midget Jokes

Score: 3478

What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph cause he isn't a full essay

Score: 1450

Did you hear about the guy who's been pickpocketing midget charity workers? How could someone stoop so low?

Score: 630

I just saw a midget get pickpocketed... I still can't believe someone could stoop so low.

Score: 598

Why did the midget get kicked out of the nudist colony? He kept getting in everyone's hair.

Score: 499

The other day, I saw a midget prisoner climbing down a wall. About halfway down he turned and sneered at me, and I thought, "That's a little condescending."

Score: 478

There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence.... ...... as he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well that's a little condescending.

Score: 386

What do you call a mexican midget? A paragraph because he's too short to be an essay!

Score: 330

I accidentally rear ended someone at a stop light while not paying attention.. We get out to exchange information, and I notice the guy is a midget. The first thing he says is, "I'm not happy." To which I replied, "Well which one are you then?"

Score: 322

I was reading in the paper today about a midget that got pick pocketed. How could anyone stoop so low?

Score: 304

What do a dwarf and a midget have in common? Very little.

Score: 270

Midget Discrimination A midget asks the librarian,”Do you have any books on midget discrimination?” The librarian replies,”Top shelf”.

Score: 199

I saw a midget in a KKK outfit today I think he is a little racist.

Score: 189

what do you call a Mexican midget? a paragraph, too short to be an ese

Score: 175

What do you call a chubby midget? Low fat.

Score: 163

What do you call a midget who makes inappropriate jokes in the workplace? A little unprofessional

Score: 142

A psychic midget has escaped from prison.. Police are looking for a small medium at large.

Score: 140

What do you call a midget with epilepsy that makes pizza? Little Seizures...

Score: 130

Did you hear about the guy who pick pocketed a midget? How could he stoop so low?

Score: 128

What did the doctor say to the angry midget? "I'm going to ask you to be a little patient."

Score: 126

Have you heard about the midget Klan member? He was a little racist.

Score: 126

-Hi, do you have books on midget discrimination? -Yeah, look on that top shelf in the corner

Score: 117

What do you call a psychic midget who escaped from jail? A small medium at large

Score: 115

What do you call a psychic midget who just escaped from prison? A small medium at large.

Score: 97

What does a dwarf and a midget have in common? Very little.

Score: 97

What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph, because he is too short to be an essay!

Score: 95

What do you call a Mexican midget? A paragraph. He's too short to be an esé

Score: 95

What did the Doctor say to the midget in the waiting room? "You're going to have to be a little patient"

Score: 91

What do you call a midget doing a cartwheel? A midget spinner.

Score: 89

Why should a midget not attempt to slaughter a cow? The steaks are just too high.

Score: 87

Today I saw a midget prisoner climbing down the prison wall... He turned and sneered at me, I thought: 'that's a little condescending'.

Score: 70

An old lady gets into an accident with a midget... ...he gets out of the car, obviously furious, and stomps toward the old woman. "I am *not* happy," he growls.
The old woman, calm as can be, says:
"Well, which one are you, then?"

Score: 58

What does a midget have in common with a dwarf? Very little.

Score: 55

Did you hear about the 7' NBA star who married a blonde midget? He was nuts over her.

Score: 41

A midget who claims to see dead people just escaped from a psychiatric ward. There's a small medium at large.

Score: 25

A psychic midget has escaped from prison Yes, we have a small medium at large.

Score: 19

I just saw a midget escaping from prison by climbing down the wall! Half way down, he turned his head and grimaced at me. I thought: “That’s a little condescending.”

Score: 18

What do you call a psychic midget who escapes from jail ? A small medium at large.

Score: 7

Really made me smile when I walked past a group of midget mathematicians today... It's the little things that count.

Score: 6

Two midget asians sit atop each other and get makeup to look Caucasian for a movie, the director says no because two wongs don’t make a white

Score: 6

New Midget Jokes

What do you call a short person with ADHA break dancing? A midget spinner

Score: 0

What do you call a midget cop who talks a lot in Minnesota? A Minneapolis( mini yap police).

Score: 3

What do you call a midget psychic who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large.

Score: 0

The midget wedding I was at went really fast It was just a really short reception I guess

Score: 0

So a Psychic Midget escaped from Jail There is a small medium at large

Score: 0

Did you hear the one about the police officer who pickpocketed the disabled midget? I never knew someone could stoop so low.

Score: 0

The Tennis Playing Midget Did you hear about the midget who died playing tennis? He fell off the ping pong table.

Score: 2

What happens when a midget robot goes out in the rain? It shorts out

Score: 1

Did you hear the one about the midget psychic on the run from the cops? The headline read, "Small Medium at Large"

Score: 2

I saw a midget prisoner trying to climb down a huge wall. I thought to myself Well, that's a little con descending...

Score: 2

Did you hear about the midget psychic who broke out of prison? He's a small medium at large.

Score: 3

What do you call a midget clairvoyant recently escaped from prison? Small medium at large.

Score: 2

What do you call a midget who is also a psychic that escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

Score: 4

I was playing blackjack against this midget the other day and he cleaned me out. I thought I was good at gambling, but he is a little bettor.

Score: 5

Did you hear about the midget psychic who escaped a mental institution?.... he was a small medium at large.

Score: 4

What do you call a midget escaping out of a prison window? A little con-descending!

Score: 2

Today I saw a midget climbing down a prison wall... I thought to myself, that’s a little condescending.

Score: 3

What do you call a short person who summersaults out of a circus cannon? A midget spinner

Score: 3

A midget psychic escapes from prison. News headlines: SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

Score: 2

Is it offensive if a guy standing next to a lady in a crowded elevator compliments the smell of her hair? How about if he is a midget?

Score: 2

Why did the midget decide not to open his own butcher shop? Because, the steaks were too high!

Score: 3

A midget psychic escapes from prison. Headlines read ”Small medium at large”

Score: 0

I called my lawyer and told him I felt a little racist He said "I don't think that's a crime..."

I responded "Well this midget in the klan hood disagrees with you."

Score: 2

A midget got elected mayor yet no one recalled voting for him. He had friends in high places

Score: 2

Why does it feel hot when a midget waves at you? Cos it's a Microwave

Score: 3

My son asked me why midgets were like that I told him that they did not eat enough vegetables, now he is saying that he wants to become a midget and wont eat vegetables smh.

Score: 2

I just got called for jury duty and the judge is a midget. I’m assuming it will be a short trial.

Score: 2

What do you call a midget who hates tall people? A bigot.

Score: 2

The other day a midget started insulting me for no reason... I chose to be the bigger man and acted like it never happened.

Score: 1

What's best about hiring an immigrant midget? You pay them under the table ;)

Score: 1

I saw someone pick-pocketing a midget the other day... How can anyone stoop so low...

Score: 5