1. To dance using predominantly your bum, usually sexually.
2. Where people in Yorkshire go Monday to Friday
For everyone in the working world today: It's a Tuesday... ...which is like a Monday but with steel-toed boots and a slightly lower aim.
Why are Saturday and Sunday the strongest days of the week? Because Monday through Friday are weekdays.
1: A dance using predominantly your bum, usually sexually
2: A place Newfoundlanders go, usually 9-5, Monday - Friday
How to sustain a long marriage
Have two romatic dinners every week.
You can do a lot of things on a romatic dinner, like drinking wine, dancing, watching TV etc.
My wife goes on Monday and Wednesday, I go on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
A wife tells her husband “I want us to have a great weekend”
The Husband replies....
“Ok I’ll see you Monday then”
The Viking God Thor comes to Earth... and spends all weekend shagging a woman with a harelip. On Monday morning he says to her "I am Thor". She replies "you're thor, I can't even pith!"
I'm going my laundry on Monday instead of Sunday. I have the day off that day because of Martin Luther King day. In the spirit of the holiday, I am not going to separate my colors from my whites.
New lockdown rules in England...
New lockdown rules in England mean from Monday groups of up to six can meet. Six of the Seven Dwarves are arranging to meet up.
One of them isn’t Happy.
Most offensive sentence you ever read. I'm a white male, Christian that goes to work 9-5 Monday through Friday.
I'm handling Monday the same way I handle constipation. Gritting my teeth and wishing it pass already.
What did the businessman say when he woke up in a hotel room Monday morning next to two prostitutes? Hi ho. Hi ho. It's off to work I go.
Why can you not break Prince Rupert's Drops Monday thru Friday? Because you have to hit them on the weak end.
Monday through Friday I have a friend who, Monday through Friday seems very strong, but Saturday and Sunday he's weekend.
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F. After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F.
I hope that Cyber Monday extends to the deep web... Because I'm going to need to a discount on a new liver after all of that Thanksgiving drinking!
After all the rioting and destruction Microsoft stock ($MSFT) will take off on Monday Everyone will be looking for windows.
So we're all thinking it by this point!
Fact of Life:
After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says W T F
Did you hear about the African who loved Monday Mornings? He was a Monday morning kinda Gueye.
What’s the typical thing a patient says at the Diarrhea Clinic on a Monday morning? “I had a terrible weak end.”
Black monday is way better then black friday, look at the deals these people in Ferguson are getting. Stuff is free!!
Why was the clam limping on Monday morning? Because he went clubbing at the weekend and pulled a mussel.
First thing I do Monday mornings when I get to the office is switch the regular and decaf coffee. Then I make myself a cup of tea and watch pandemonium ensue.
I don't have a 8am meeting on a Monday I don't have a 8am meeting on a Monday. My calendar shows an "alternative schedule".
My nations top doctor just told me the cure for coronavirus.. Play 2 days of golf and call him on Monday
Things to say, that won't get you the job. (Whose line: SFaH style)
"Now...i would like monday through saturday off..."
"So I have no clue why I'm here but it pays good right?"
"I need this job to pay for my weed, is that cool?"
Working days I work only for Monday and Tuesday. Because after that even the week says WTF?!...
Monday Next Monday I'm planning Tuesday at my friend's house. Who knows we might get Thursday and buy some beers. Friday and Saturday we'll just chill and enjoy our ice cream Sunday.
i joined a yoga class the other day.
they said “are you flexible?”
i said “yeah i can do monday to friday”
BREAKING NEWS: Post Malone announces he will only be scheduling shows Monday thru Saturday Guess there's no Post on Sundays
I got burned pretty badly... On my birthday no less...
Last Monday was my birthday. One of my sister's friends was at my house and asked how old I was. I told her, "42."
"Wow! You don't look a day over 50!"
So, yeah... Happy birthday...
Sometimes we get the joy of Friday, but with the misery of Monday swirled in I call it... A Monday-Friday Sunday
If life was a YouTube video... Monday would be that annoying ad that doesn't have the "You can skip in 5 seconds" option.
Francisco Nunez Olivera, the world’s oldest man, died at his home in Spain – a month after celebrating his 113th birthday last Monday night... I shall miss reading his jokes on here...
Another Monday morning of people on the Internet screaming about what other people can or can't say. I wish these Game if Thrones spoilers would stop.
This monday there will be a solar eclipse at 10am... Followed shortly after by funeral proceedings for the Flat Earth Society.
What are the odds of USA beating Brazil in soccer?
Brazilian to one....
(credit to bill burr's monday morning podcast)
I'd love to watch 48 Hours But it would be Monday by the time it's finished and ain't nobody got time for that.