A joke my 8-year old made up: What do you call a chicken that's afraid of the dark? A chicken.
Joke from my daughter
Her: Why did the chicken cross the road?
Her: To get to the ugly guy's house.
Her: Knock knock
Me: Who's there?
Her: It's the chicken!
They say you are what you eat... today I bought some ready to eat chicken and sure enough I was ready to eat chicken.
What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common? They both contain high amounts of trans fats.
A man goes to a Halloween party dressed up as a chicken and he meets a girl dressed up as an egg. The answer is the chicken.
Why do chicken coops have 2 doors? Because if they had 4 doors, they would be chicken sedans.
Two blondes meet at a busy chicken market
A: If I can guess how many chickens you have in that bag, can I have one?
B: You can have both
Teacher: "Kids, what does the fluffy chicken give you?"
Teacher: "Very good! Now what does the pink pig give you?"
Teacher: "Great! And what does the fat cow give you?"
I think the Rainforest Cafe takes the whole rainforest theme too far. This one time I was sitting there eating my chicken tenders and they bulldozed 40% of the restaurant.
I went out for Chinese last night, I told the waiter that the chicken was rubbery... He thanked me.
I saw a chicken staring angrily at the road I wondered, "Why did the road cross the chicken?"
When your Dad is a math teacher you grow up with jokes like this...
Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
A: To get to the same side!
I’m on a plane and the lunch choices are white meat chicken or German sausage. Unfortunately, I’m seated in the last row. I’m hoping for the breast, but preparing for the wurst.
Chicken and an egg A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken lights up a cigarette. The egg, with a dissatisfied look on it's face, rolls over and remarks, "Well, I guess we answered that question."
Why did the chicken get an ouija board? To contact those who had crossed over to the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a sign at the front of a building that said "chicken strips for $2"
I lost my job as a waiter when I served one of the customers his food. On the downside, I got chicken all over my tennis racket.
A turkey was about to cross the road... when a chicken appeared and said "dont do that that, you will never hear the end of it"
Ordered 4 drinks at McDonald's..... ....so they wouldn't think all 50 chicken nuggets were for me.
From my 9 year old niece...”What is it called when a chicken is staring at a salad?” Chicken sees a salad.
Just made a chicken salad... Not even sure if chicken's like salad, but I guess we're about to find out
A priest, a rabbi, and a chicken walk into a bar.
The bartender says "Nope! We don't do jokes here, get out!"
And the chicken says, "Come on guys, I know a place across the street."
Why did Mozart kill his chicken? Because when he asked the chicken "Who's the best composer" the chicken said "Bach, Bach, Bach"
Reporter to the world’s first trillionaire: “Sir, what are you going to do with all that money?”. “I can buy a chicken and some bread now!”, says Abou, while walking out of his bank in Zimbabwe
A chicken can jump higher than Empire state building... It's true because buildings can't jump.
The waiter said to me “I just want to let you know that kids eat for free.” I said “Good! I’ll take a water and some chicken tenders, and my daughter will have a steak and a kids Bud Light.”
Why didn't the chicken go down the slide? He de-slided not to!!!!! Ha ha.... I have no friends
A guy walks into his home with a chicken under his arm...
Husband: "here's the cow I've been sleeping with"
Wife: "that's not a cow that's a chicken"
Husband: "I wasn't talking to you"
A chicken pie in Jamaica costs €2.00 A chicken pie in Trinidad costs €2.15 A chicken pie in St Kitts costs €2.40 These are the pie rates of the Caribbean.
There was a bad storm that broke the chicken coop causing a farmer to lose a few chickens.
After the storm he asked his farm hand how many chickens were left.
“16 chickens, sir.”
“Alright, round them up, please.”
“20 chickens, sir.”
Started a chicken dating website. It's not my full time job, just doing it to make hens meet.
There's a strange new trend at work, people are writing names on the food in the company fridge Today I had a chicken sandwich named Kevin
My science teacher told us this
James Bond says to a chicken, "I'm Bond, James Bond." The chicken turns and says, "Well I'm Ken, Chic-ken."
I'll see myself out...
You can't fool me. I know chicken fried rice isn't real. You expect me to believe a chicken fried this rice?
Having a girl as a friend is like having a chicken as a pet.. Sooner or later you're gonna want to eat it
I fed my chickens a chicken wing... I guess you could say they enjoyed themselves. *ba dum tss*
My 8 year old son wrote this...
What do you call the ghost of a chicken that haunts people in their homes?
An African lady named Betty came into my restaurant today and asked, "Is there any chicken on the menu?" I replied, "No, Black Betty, it's ham or lamb."
Did you hear about the family of racist chicken detectives? They're called the Clue Clucks Clan