Mormon Jokes

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all of your alcohol? Invite two of them.

Score: 1488

How do you stop a Mormon from drinking all the beer at your party? Invite a second Mormon.

Score: 399
Funny Mormon Jokes
Score: 119

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all your booze? Invite two of them!!

Score: 113

Why do Mormon women stop having babies at 35? Because 36 is just too many.

Score: 98

How do you keep a mormon from drinking all your beer? Invite 2 mormons

Score: 88

Why should you always take two Mormon's fishing? Cause if you take one, he'll drink all your beer

Score: 78

Why do Mormon women stop having kids at 35? 36 would be just too many.

Score: 78

Joseph Smith sold so many copies of the Book of Mormon That they made him a prophet.

Score: 54

I like my Men like I like my Coffee I'm Mormon. I'm not allowed.

Score: 53

What's the difference between a Mormon man and a Muslim man. A Mormon man gets 72 virgins and THEN kills himself.

Score: 36

What do you get when you cross a Jehovah witness and a Mormon? I have no idea but I can’t get him off my porch

Score: 26

What do you call an alcoholic Mormon? An oxymormon

Score: 22

Why did the Mormon cross the road? To get to the other bride.

Score: 20

When you go on a fishing trip with a Mormon, how do you keep him from drinking all of your beer? You invite another Mormon.

Score: 19

What do you call a man who has 5 dishwashers? A Mormon.

Score: 18

What do you call a Mormon climber? A Ladder Day Saint.

Score: 15

Why did the prostitute join the Mormon church? She wanted a high paying missionary position.

Score: 12

How do you keep a Mormon from drinking all your beer on a camping trip? Take two of them with you.

Score: 12

What's the most confusing day in a Mormon home? Mother's Day.

Score: 11

How do you get a Mormon to not drink all of your beer on a fishing trip? Bring two Mormons.

Score: 11

Have you heard about the Mormon drag queen? She is Polly Glamorous

Score: 10

How do you get a Mormon to stop drinking all your booze? You invite two of them.

Score: 10

What’s the opposite of a Mormon? An oxymormon.

Score: 9

What do you call a rational scientific Mormon? An Oxymormon

Score: 8

Why do Mormon women stop having kids at 38? Because 39 is just too many.

Score: 8

What do you get when you cross a Mormon with an atheist? Someone who knocks on doors for no apparent reason.

Score: 8

First I dated a seventh day adventist and then a mormon I told my mom that im not just in it for the sects but she doesn't believe me.

Score: 7

Where can you find a mormon horse? Salt Lick City.

Score: 6

Fun Fact: Jared Fogle was a Mormon I heard he graduated top of his class at Bring Em Young University

Score: 6

Woman opens the door to find a pair of Mormon missionaries on the porch... Missionaries: Have you heard of the Prophet Joseph Smith?

Woman: Yes, that's why I'm not Mormon anymore.

Score: 2

The Mormon Prophet has banned Tomb Raider games... ...apparently they have fake Native American history in them that doesn't revolve around Native Americans being a lost tribe of Israel.

Score: 2

Did you hear about the new movement in the Mormon church? #MeThree

Score: 2

What's the difference between a moron and a Mormon? One of them *gets it.*

Score: 1

What do you call it when the church of Latter Day Saints invades an area? The Mormon conquest.

Score: 1

What is one restaurant you will never see a Mormon in? In-N-Out.

Score: 1

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