Uranus Jokes

What happens when the thermometer breaks during your rectal examination? Mercury is in Uranus

What would be the first thing communists do if they ruled the solar system? Rename Uranus to Ouranus

During my check-up I asked my doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy live?" He replied, "I doubt it. Mercury is in Uranus right now"

I said, "I don't believe in any of that astrology bullshit doc"

"Neither do I. My thermometer just broke"

If you shrunk the solar system down so that the sun was at the top of your head and the orbit of Pluto was at your feet, Uranus would be right about where you'd expect it to be.

If a rectal thermometer breaks in your butt There’s mercury in Uranus

My boyfriend asked me how many planets are in our solar system. And I said. "Eight"
And he said, "Nope, only 7, after I destroy Uranus tonight."

Why did SpaceX go to Mars Becuase SpaceY already went to Uranus

I wish my name was Voyager 2... So I could have the first encounter with Uranus

What the the planet Jupiter say to Neptune? I can see Uranus from here.

Did you know that Earth can fit into Uranus 63 times? 64 if you relax enough.

Talking about planets with my nephew. He asked if you could Plow thru Uranus because it's all gas

The Earth may be flat But Uranus is round

Saturn and Neptune are the butt cheeks of the solar system Uranus is between them

What time of year is Mercury and Uranus closest together? Flu season

Nasa scientists became fed up of jokes on Uranus and decided to change it's name It's now called Urrectum

The Planets 71% water + 29% land = Earth

100% land + 0% Chocolate = Mars

100% land + 0% Fertility = Venus

100% land and lava + 0% Freddy = Mercury

100% land + 0% Dog = Pluto

100% gas = Uranus

The person who discovered Uranus Went down in the anals of history

Why is Uranus classified as a planet and not as a Black Hole?

Why does Jupiter have farts? Because it’s a gas giant.

Joke from my dad Do a handstand and stare up at the night sky at 10:00 pm. When you do, call your parents and tell them to look outside. When they do, they will be able to see Uranus from where they stand

What is the core of Uranus called Urectum

BREAKING NEWS : URANUS IS NOT A PLANET ..... you're sitting on it.

Which fast food joint would you like to see in space? Personally, I'd love to see Five Guys on Uranus

Why should you Keep the earth clean? Because It’s not Uranus

What's the difference between SpaceX and SpaceY? One wants to go to Mars and the other wants Uranus

Giant methane storms on Uranus Ex-post from r/science

I saw Uranus from my dorm room last night... ...Next time close your Urcurtains.

Today is the anniversary of the discovery of Uranus! Hershel was actually looking for the clitoris but found Uranus instead.

NASA sends out a probe to Uranus Geeks around the world giggle.

NASA sends probe to Uranus people everywhere giggle

NASA sent a probe to all of the planets in our solar system, but quit after Uranus They found it to be a shithole.

What's the difference between Uranus and your butt? One is huge, round and surround by a cloud of smelly methane gas. The other one's a planet.

Why did the astronomer get arrested? He tried to look at Uranus with a telescope.

What does Uranus want the most? Venis

The Black Hole is getting too much attention... Uranus is missing out...

I can't believe it. You know how Pluto was found to be a dwarf planet? Well, another planet is actually an imposter. Uranus is a black hole.

Someone once said to me 'You know, Pluto is more interesting to me than Uranus ' I said 'Thanks. Can you please finish the prostate exam?'

Damn girl are you a planet? Because i can see Uranus through my binoculars at night.

What are the names of your favourite celestial bodies? Titan Uranus