Hilarious Bee Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Bee Jokes

My wife got stung by a bee on the forehead. She's at the ER now, her face all swollen and bruised, she almost died. Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.

Score: 15858

Score: 8345

If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.

Score: 5712

If there's a bee in my hand, what's in my eye? Beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

ITT: People who want to kill me, people who think I am their dad, more puns about bees, puns about beer, "oh I get it", and "this joke is more like a riddle"

Score: 2584

What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi

I'll let myself out now.

Score: 862

If there's a bee in my hand, what's in my eye? Beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Score: 638

If you have a bee in your hand what do you have in your eye? Beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Score: 616

My boyfriend started a bee farm to help save the bees I think he's a keeper

Score: 592

Yesterday my wife got stung by a bee while golfing I asked where, and she informed me it was between the first and second holes. Being the helpful type, I advised her that her stance was too wide.

Score: 587

Go away bee, don't bother me. A wise man once told me, if a bee is bothering you, don't swat or run away, just stand still and look right at it, because seeing is believing.

Score: 501

Why did the CIA torture the Russian wasp? Because he was a cagey bee agent.

Score: 381

If you have Bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty. Because beauty is in the eye of the Bee holder.

Score: 312

So, I just tried a new drinking game. I put in the Bee Movie, and every time they make a bee pun, I take a shot.

Unfortunately, I could only get buzzed.

Score: 278

If I have a bee in my hand, what is in my eyes? Beauty, because beauty is in the eyes of the bee-holder

Score: 264

At the spelling bee Judge: Your word is "there."

Me: In a sentence please.

Judge: They're parking their car over there.

Score: 191

What do you call a bee from America? USB

Score: 188

Where does a bumblebee sit? On her bee-hind!

As told to me by my very excited 3 year granddaughter.

Score: 187

What do you call a bee that comes from America? a USB!

Score: 187

What did the sushi say to the bee? WASABI.

Ah, best lame joke ever.

Score: 177

What do you call a bee that lives in America? a USB

Score: 171

My wife got stung by a bee on her forehead. She’s at the ER now and her face is all swollen and bruised. She almost died! Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with my shovel.

Score: 153

My brother is in the ER right now because of a bee sting that swelled his head, Luckily I was close enough to hit the bee with a shovel.

Score: 124

What do you call a bee trying to make up its mind? A maybe

Score: 106

What floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee? Nothing.

Score: 93

What bee produces milk? A boo-bee

Score: 77

My 7 year old daughter drops this joke on me. What kind of bee's make milk?

Boo-bee's

Score: 65

Mike Tyson was arrested at a 5th grade sitting bee his first time judging The word was Dictate.

[Spelling Bee Contestant] Can you use it in a sentence?

[Mike Tyson] She liked the way my Dictate

Score: 65

I'll tell you what's a dangerous insect... ....That Hepatitis Bee

Score: 60

If you have a bee in your hand, what's in your eye? Beauty. It's in the eye of the bee-holder.

Score: 59

What do you call a bee that can't makeup it's mind? A maybe.

Score: 56

Please pray for my mother-in-law. She was taken to hospital this morning. A bee landed on her face. Luckily she wasn't stung. I was too quick with the spade.

Score: 43

I smoked a bee the other day... Just trying to catch a buzz...

Score: 40

What do you call an American Bee? A USB.

Score: 35

If I am holding a bee, what is in my eye? Beauty.

Because beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

Score: 23

What is Barry Gibb better at than the rest of the Bee Gees? Staying Alive

Score: 22

If you have a bee in your hand, what's in your eye? Beauty, cause beauty is in the eye of the beeholder

Score: 19

For my wife's birthday, I got a guy to follow her all day making bee noises. She really wanted a hummer.

Score: 18

How can you get stung by the alphabet? A bee. See?

Score: 13

How do you comb a bee's hair? With a honeycomb!

I'm sorry I found this joke on a popsicle stick please forgive me.

Score: 12

What do you call a bee that was just born? A babee.

Score: 10

New Bee Jokes

so my friend went to the pet store he went up to the lady running the cash register and bought 5 bumble bee's.

the cashier proceeds to hand him 6 bee's

he then said "but i only paid for 5"

she then said "the 6th ones a freebie"

Score: 1

I had hired a ninja for my child who was struggling with entomology. It worked because... She know bee

Score: 2

What grade/rating would you give to insect conservationists on the job they've been doing the last decade? I give them a bee minus

Score: 2

What grade/rating would you give to intersect conservationists on the job they've been doing for the last decade? I give them a bee minus.

Score: 1

What do you call an immortal bee? a zombee.

Sorry this joke was trash

Score: 4

My wife complained about getting stung by bees I said “honey you should bee more careful, the bees are miss beHIVING around this time of day”

Score: 3

So, they are making a prequel to the Bee Movie... I guess they are gonna call it the "A" movie.

Score: 1

What bee can you get milk from? A boo bee.

Score: 3

What did the dyslexic kid get after being forced to compete in the spelling bee? ABCPTSD

Score: 2

What do you call the stakes in the finals of a spelling bee The alpha-bet

Score: 1

What is a bee’s favorite news source? CNN. They hate Buzzfeed too.

Score: 5

A semi-blind caveman is walking through a forest He sees some brightly coloured flowers and right next to them he sees what he thinks is 2 bees, he has bad eyesight and isn’t sure so he turns to his caveman friend and says

“2 bee or not 2 bee?”

Score: 1

I got a percipitation trophy At the spelling bee...

Score: 1

I did pretty well in my insect catching exam... I got a bee.

Score: 8

What did he Ghost say to the bee? Boobie

Score: 3

What do you call Bumble Bee when he's drunk? Stumble Bee.

Be kind please.

Score: 4

What's a ghosts favourite type of bee? Boooooooobies

Score: 4

What do you call a sexually predatious bee? Harvey Weinsting

Score: 3

A doctor is talk g with a little girl The doctor says,
"You're like a honey bee!"
The little girl says,
"Why? Because I'm so sweet?"
The doctor replies,
" No, because you're dying at an alarming rate."

Score: 4

What do you call a sassy bumble bee that has to scratch it's nose? A bee-itch

Score: 4

What did the mama bee name her two sons? Paul n' Nate.

Score: 2

When you meet an apiarist, look deep into his eyes... Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.

Score: 4

What's smarter than a talking bird? A spelling bee

Score: 8

The teacher asked little Johnnie if he had ever seen a humming bird... Little Johnnie said, "No, but one time I saw a spelling bee."

Score: 4

What happens when you combine Emoji Movie and Bee Movie? 🅱️ Movie

Score: 1

How do you make a bee stop bothering you? Stare at it.

Seeing is bee leaving.

Score: 6

If you see a wasp, don't kill it. Just let it bee

Score: 2

Why was the spelling bee cancelled? One of the participants spelled disaster.

Score: 10

What did the sushi roll say to the bee? Wasabi

Score: 6

You know the animal that kills the most people in the world? The Hepatitis Bee

Score: 7

What is it called when bee lacks water in their body? Beehydration..

Score: 4

They said due to my dyslexia, I wouldn't stand a chance in a spelling bee. You should've seen the look on their faces when I proved them grown.

Score: 5

Why did the Bee go to the Doctor? It had Hives

Score: 2

Man walks into a pet shop... Man walks into a pet shop and says to the woman behind the counter, "I want to buy a bee". She reply "we don't sell bees", he says, "well you've got one in the window".

Score: 3

Did you hear about the balding bee? He tried to hide it with a honeycombover.

Score: 4

The creator of Arby's was a pirate. He was walking one day thinking of a name for his new restaurant, until he got stung by a bee and shouted "Argh-bees!"

Score: 2

Subreddit for these type of jokes? Is there a dedicated subreddit for joke like these?

What kinda of bee can't make up it's mind? A Maybe

What do you call and alligator who's a detective? An investigator.

Score: 2

Did you hear about the hornet who left home in search of the divine truth? He's a bee-leaver

Score: 2

What's more impressive than a counting pig? A spelling bee.

Score: 4

Why did the bee fly in a parabolic arch? Just bee-cos.

Score: 4

If I kill someone durng a spelling bee contest... can the judge use that in a sentence?

Score: 5

A woman walks into the clubhouse after nine holes... "Whats the problem ma'am?"

"I got stung by a bee"

"Where at?"

"Between the first and second hole"

"Well I'd say your stance is too wide"

Score: 6

I'm trying to decide whether to start a honey farm. To bee, or not to bee. That is the question.

Score: 6

What did the little bee say to his big bullies? Please don't beelittle me

Score: 3

What does the US Army have in common with a queen bee? Drones do all their work for them

Score: 2

Bee Marry Why did the bee marry?

He’s finally found his honey.

Score: 4

The last time I saw an asian guy beat that badly..... ...it was by an indian girl at the Scripps National Spelling Bee

Score: 3

Why didn't the bee want crab legs? He wanted bee-food, not seafood!

Score: 2

A suicidal bee is about to leap. To bee or not to bee.

Score: 2

I was stung by a bee yesterday... $40 for a jar of honey.

Score: 2

Why did the bee order a cup of coffee? For a quick buzz

Score: 8

What does a bee say when it returns to it's hive? Honey, I'm home!

Score: 9

What do you call a mini-golf club made of wasp testicles that's covered in Reese's Pieces? A peanut butter bee-nut putter.

Score: 8

I swallowed a live bee the other day It turned into quite an intra-sting situation.

Score: 2

If the wasp hadn't of stung me I wouldn't have killed it. The lesson learned is that violence bee gets violence.

Score: 1

Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey.

Score: 2

Why should apiarists determine standards of beauty? Because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.

Score: 6

How do you scare a bee? Boo bee. (Boobie - get it? - courtesy of my kids)

Score: 3

How does a Bee get to work? He catches a buzz.

Score: 1

What kind of bee can you milk? A boobie..

Score: 6