Why is the white guy the scariest guy in prison? Cause you know he is actually guilty.
After my wife died I couldn’t look at women for 20 years But when I got out of prison, it was totally worth it
My brother who has a stutter is in prison. It’s just heartbreaking knowing he will never finish his sentence.
Prison may be just one word
But to others, it's a whole sentence
Edit: I fell asleep after posting this and woke up seeing it on the front page, thanks guys!
So my twin brother called me from prison He said, "So you know how we finish each others' sentences?"
Bill Clinton tried to cheer up Hillary this morning. He reminded her that Nelson Mandela wasn't elected President until after he had served 27 years in prison.
If I ever go to prison, I’m gonna change my name to mitochondria... I want everyone to know I’m the powerhouse of the cell.
Why is the white guy the scariest guy in prison? You know he's guilty.
After my wife died, I haven't been able to look at other women for 10 years... But now that I'm out of prison I can honestly say that it was worth it.
What's the scariest thing about a white guy in a prison? You know he actually did it.
There is still hope for for Hillary Clinton Nelson Mandela became President after 27 years in prison.
A man just released from prison was walking down the street shouting, "I'm free! I'm free!"... A little boy yelled back at him, "that's nothing, I'm four!"
I just got a new job teaching English at a maximum security prison. It's going to be tough but like any other job out there..... It'll have its prose and cons.
I wanted to marry my English teacher when she got out of prison... ...but apparently you can't end a sentence with a proposition.
Stuttering man released from prison early.. He could not finish his sentence
After my wife died I couldn’t look at a woman for twenty years. But when I got out of prison it was totally worth it.
Two women in a shared cell were in the prison for 15yrs. When they were freed... ...they spent another 2hrs talking outside.
What do prison and the Caps Lock button have in common? They both turn “o” into an “O”.
My friend went to prison for something he didn't do. He didn't wipe the fingerprints off the gun.
why should you be afraid of a white man in prison? because you know he's guilty.
Did you know that if you take all the blood vessels from an average size human body and lay them out end to end You'll go to prison for a very long time.
There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence.... ...... as he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well that's a little condescending.
What do prison and the shift key have in common they both turn your "o" into an "O"
Child: Dad I want to be a plumber when I grow up
Dad: That’s a very low goal. Have some ambition
Child: How about being a doctor?
Dad: That’s right!
Child: Or a teacher, a prison guard, a gym trainer....
Dad: HAVE YOU BEEN USING MY COMPUTER?
To Hillary supporters, don't give up hope! Nelson Mandela served 27 years in prison before becoming President.
I got a prison tattoo of mitochondria Now I truly am the powerhouse of the cell
I work in a prison, and when people ask me if I enjoy my job... ...I tell them that it has it's pros and cons.
So, my twin brother just called me from prison. He said, "So you know how we tend to finish each others' sentences?"
prison may be just one word to you but to others, it's a whole sentence
Today I saw a midget prisoner climbing down the prison wall... He turned and sneered at me, I thought: 'that's a little condescending'.
What do you call a psychic midget that escapes from prison? A small medium at large.
Why did the duck go to prison? He got caught selling quack.
Today I drove by a prison...
and saw a midget prisoner climbing down the wall.
As he jumped down, he sneered at me and I thought, well, that's a little condescending.
I'm starting a club that discusses the good and bad parts of poetry in prison. It's called "Prose and Cons"
Just got out of prison after attacking a man on New Year's. Excuse me for getting nervous while an Arab was counting down from 10.
What does Pokemon and a prison break have in common? You gotta catch Jamal.
I hope I don't go to prison after what I did today. When I was in the shower I dropped the soap like ten times.
What do you call a psychic midget that escapes prison? A small medium at large.
If I ever get sent to prison I’m changing my name to mitochondria I’ll want everyone to know I’m the powerhouse of the cell.
What is the prison that saying it's name causes you to get banned? Azkaban.
What do you call a psychic dwarf who just escaped from prison? A small medium at large!
If being handsome was a crime, I'd be in prison for a lifetime Because there are 8 bodies in my freezer
What does a prison and a teenager have in common. Neither of them want a break out.
What do you call a midget psychic who has escaped from prison? A small medium at large.
Pedophiles have lighter prison sentences than drug dealers. Their addiction is a minor one.
A psychic with dwarfism has just escaped from prison! So, now there's a small medium at large!
My brother who has stutter is in prison right now....
So sad he will not be able to complete his sentence
Taken from u/gagga_hei
A chloride molecule was sent to prison for charges of terrorism...
One day during a riot he made an escape attempt but in the heated situation he was forced to leave half of himself behind.
But hey, at least he was a free radical.
What did Harvey Dent do after he got out of prison? He became a dentist...
Did you hear about the midget psychic who broke out of prison? He's a small medium at large.
Why is the white guy in prison the scariest guy there? Cuz he’s the warden
What do you call a midget clairvoyant recently escaped from prison? Small medium at large.
What do you call a midget escaping out of a prison window? A little con-descending!
Today I saw a dwarf sneaking out of a prison window on a rope of bedsheets and I said to myself... Well, that’s just a little condescending.
Today I saw a midget climbing down a prison wall... I thought to myself, that’s a little condescending.
I was driving by the prison today, and I saw a dwarf climbing down the prison wall. So I thought to myself, “that’s a little condescending.”
Why did the guy who never uses punctuation go to prison for a long time? Because he had a long sentence.
A midget psychic escapes from prison. News headlines: SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!
Did you know you're not allowed to bring McDonalds when you visit someone in prison? After 10 minutes the fries can be used as shanks.
Did you hear the one about NFL players and prison inmates? It's about pros and cons.
Why did the lead guitarist get sent to prison? for fingering a minor
A midget psychic escapes from prison. Headlines read ”Small medium at large”
What do the mitochondria and a prison generator have in common? They are both the powerhouse of the cell.
On Blue's Clues, Steve didn't leave to go to college - he was sent to prison. He realized far too late that he shouldn't have brought Slippery Soap with him.
A police officer gets thee years in prison for Just kidding, police officers never get a full sentence.
I just saw a midget escaping from prison by climbing down the wall! Half way down, he turned his head and grimaced at me. I thought: “That’s a little condescending.”
What do you call a White man in a prison? a Guardian
So I noticed a pretty popular costume yesterday. It was a bit large, orange... Wait! Now I remember. It was Kevin Spacey's prison jumpsuit
What happens when a wiener encounters puberty? A 21 month federal prison sentence.
How do they communcate in prison?
How do they communcate in prison? Cell phones.... Val Kilmer told me this joke once.
Did you hear Aaron Hernandez killed himself in prison? I guess he couldn't Handle going from a tight end to a wide receiver after all...
How did Nelson Mandela do laundry while in prison? He used one part water, a part corn starch, and a part Tide.
What did the guitarist go to prison for? Fingering a minor.
Did you here about the guy that went to prison for writing? I'm sorry, that was completely out of con-text.
why did abe lincoln get released from prison? because he's in a cent
While I was watching the prison wall, a little midget starting climbing over it and smirked at me And I thought to myself, "That's a little condescending".
Why did the guitarist get life in prison? He fingered a minor.
Why was the sick eagle in prison? Because she was illegal.
A man is put on trial for committing mass genocide against the people of Scotland. It looked like he would be in prison for life... ...but he got off Scot-free.
At a low security prison, members of the mafia have their own version of The Breakfast Club. And their theme song is *Don't You (Fuggedaboutit)*
I just read Jared Fogle was assaulted in prison He was also a-peppered and covered in lettuce. Don't know if the story has any meat to it.
Did you hear about the painting that was falsely sent to prison? He was framed.
Why did the guitarist go to prison?
Why did the guitarist go to prison?
Because he fingered A Minor.
Jared Fogle "the subway guy" was upset to be sentenced to 15 and 1/2 years in Prison today... Funny because 15 1/2 years used to sound pretty good to him.
Did you hear about the prison escape? Those guys found the convenience of Home Depot delivery really shaves time off a project.
What's the first thing Aaron Hernandez learned in prison? He's not a tight end anymore ;)
What's the difference between an IRS audit and prison rape? In prison, you have a chance at getting a reach around
Hey beautiful, is your Dad in prison? Because if I was your Father I would be..
Being old is like being in prison... It hurts to bend over.
A dwarf, that happens to be a mystic, escapes from prison. The call went out that there was a small medium at large.
I was playing a prison simulator when the batteries in my keyboard died. Now I can't escape.
What is the only way Aaron Hernandez can avoid getting arrested and going to prison? Call Ray Lewis for tips on how to properly get away with murder
Why did the rooster get 20 years in prison? He got caught on the internet, looking up chicks.
A psychic midget has escaped from prison Yes, we have a small medium at large.
The Energizer bunny was just releases from prison.
He was charged with battery.
. . .