Bird Jokes

The stork is the bird that helps deliver babies. What bird helps prevent pregnancy? The swallow.

A mummy calls a restauraunt. - Hello, I'd like to reserve a table for the pharaoh Sakhrakhotep I.
- Could you spell it out, please?
- Of course. Bird, two triangles, wavy line, the sun, bird again, jackal's head and a scarab.

If a bluebird has blue babies and a redbird has red babies, what kind of bird has no babies? A swallow

If a stork brings white babies, and a blackbird black babies, what bird brings no babies? A Swallow.

What do you call a bird that's afraid of heights? A chicken

What’s the difference between swine flu and bird flu? Swine Flu requires oinkment and Bird Flu requires Tweetment

A Norweigan robot analyzed a bird. It scandinavian.

If the stork is the bird of birth, what's the bird of birth control? A swallow.

If a stork brings a white baby and a crow brings a black baby; what bird brings no baby? a swallow

What's the national bird of Syria A US drone

What's got two eyes, but can't see, two wings, but can't fly, and two legs, but can't walk? A dead bird.

What kind of bird doesn't have babies A swallow

If a white bird makes white babies and a black bird makes black babies, what bird makes no babies? A swallow

If I had a drop of beer for every time I made a bird pun.. I'd have toucans.

A man recently lost 28 pounds just eating chicken. It’s the only recorded instance of one bird killing two stone.

What's the difference between the USA and a bird? On a bird, the left wing and the right wing work together to benefit the whole bird.

What is the national bird of Pakistan? An American drone.

If a Norwegian robot... If a Norwegian robot analyzes a bird, it Scandinavian.

A bear climbs a tree.... a bird sitting in the tree asks "Hey, Bear, why are you up in this tree?"

the bear says "I came up here to eat apples."

the bird says "But Bear, this isn't an apple tree. there are no apples up here."

the bear says "That's ok, I brought my own."

What do you call a bird who never remembers song lyrics? A hummingbird

What is the national bird of Afghanistan? US Drone

2 blondes were walking along a beach when one said, "Look! A dead bird!" The other looked up.

What is the difference between unlawful and illegal? Unlawful = Against the law

Illegal = A sick bird

What's Afghanistan's National Bird? An American drone.

What's the National Bird of Pakistan? An American Drone.

My friend told me a stupid bird pun. I replied, "Toucan play at this game."

One bird can't make a pun. But toucan.

What kind of bird does not make babies? A swallow

What happens when a Norwegian robot scans a bird? It Scandanavian

A blonde and a brunette is sitting on a bench. Out of nowhere, the brunette says: Look! A dead bird!

The blonde gazes up into the air says where?

After eating Thanksgiving at my house, my friends are always asking me how I prepare the turkey... ...easy, I tell the bird he is going to die.

It's hard for a solitary bird to make a pun. But toucan.

I am creating a video game about a bear and bird that hire a prostitute and then don't pay her. I'm calling it "Banjo-Kazooie Nuts and Bolts"

What's the difference between being erotic and kinky? Erotic is when you use a feather.




Kinky is when you use the whole dam bird!

A blonde and a brunette are walking in a park, the brunette says awwww look a dead bird poor thing.

The blonde looks up and says where?

So, What do you call a depressed space bird? A Millennial Falcon

What do you get when you cross a bowling ball with a bird? A bowled eagle!

If the swan is the symbol of happiness, then what bird symbolizes true love? Answer:
The Swallow

What do you call an eagle in church? ...bird of prey