I was 16 minutes late for my first math lecture, 8 minutes late for the second, and 4 minutes late for the third. At this rate, I’ll never be there on time.
Did you hear about the math teacher who’s afraid of negative numbers? He will stop at nothing to avoid them.
I just saw my math teacher lock himself in his office with a piece of graph paper. I think he must be plotting something.
I failed my math exam because I couldn’t remember how to write 1, 1000, 51, 6, and 500 as Roman numerals IM LIVID
I asked my math teacher why 6 was afraid of 7.
She replied, “Approximately 0.3583679495453”.
I stared at her, confused. Seeing my confusion, she added, “You know, cos (789)”
I don't mind the Chinese students in my Math class being really good at the subject But I must say, it's pretty cocky of them to do the problems with their eyes closed.
Lying in bed, my girlfriend turned to me and said
"You're a lot like a math exam."
I replied "Why? Because I'm long and hard?"
She said, "No, I'm cheating on you with an Asian."
So I was in math class when the teacher asked me what comes after 69. Apparently, "I do." is not the correct answer.
Yeah, it's a math joke
17: Hey 11, want to hear a joke?
17: What did one prime number say to the other prime number?
11: I give up.
17: "I can't even."
11 and 17 together: HAHAHA!!!!!
2: I don't get it.
A white guy, a black guy, an Indian, an Asian women and a girl in a wheel chair walk into a bar They are celebrating being on the cover of a middle school math book
A new study shows that the majority of humans alive today are better at math than Albert Einstein. Because he's dead.
Pakistani math problem.
Ahmed has 3 lunch boxes.
He gives one to Mohammed and another to Hassan. Calculate the radius of the explosion.
I found out what that math teacher with graph paper from yesterday’s joke was plotting.... ...weapons of math instruction.
What did the math text book say to the Shakespeare text book? Look, buddy, I've already got a lot of problems, and I really don't need any of your drama.
Genie: you have three wishes
me: make math go away
Genie: ok, that one's on the house
me: yay, so I still get three wishes?
I somehow managed to make it through high school math while only being able to remember even numbers. What are the odds?
When your Dad is a math teacher you grow up with jokes like this...
Q: Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
A: To get to the same side!
Yesterday I asked a girl out, but she told me she had a boyfriend
I responded with "I have a math test tommorow"
She looked a bit confused so I said "I thought we were listing things we could cheat on."
Studies suggest that parents can do 1/3 of their kids’ math assignments However, they struggle with the other 3/4
Teacher arrested on airplane after bag was searched A protractor, a ruler, a calculator, and a book of graph paper. He was charged with possessing implements of math instruction
The problem with math jokes
Calculus jokes are derivative, trigonometry jokes are too graphic, algebra jokes are too formulaic but arithmetic jokes are just basic.
The outlier is the occasional statistics pun.
My Math teacher told me I'm terrible at telling Math jokes.
She was mode to me.
I got kicked out of math class. Apparently, "rinsing your mouth" is the wrong answer to "what comes after 69?"
Doing math after years out of school is like riding a bike It's no fun when you run into something hard.
What did the math teacher say to his trig class when he saw the test? This should be smooth scalene for you guys
Recently a teacher got arrested... Police found a pencil, ruler and notebook. Allegedly he was part of the Al-Gebra network and possessed weapons of math instruction.
Today my math teacher showed us how a lazy dog is the same as a sheet of paper.
A lazy dog is a slow pup.
A slope up is an inclined plane.
An ink lined plane is a sheet of paper.
My Math Professor was 16 minutes late for his first class, 8 minutes late for his second, and 4 minutes late for his third. At this rate, he’ll never be there in time.
A CEO needs help with a math problem so he asks his secretary to come into his office.
“If I were to give you 12% of $190,000, how much would you take off?” He asked.
She replied “everything but my earrings.”
I asked little Johnny why he started doing so well in math after we sent him to the Christian school. He said he didn't want to end up like the guy they nailed to the plus sign.
I somehow managed to make it through high school math while only memorizing even numbers. What are the odds?