Psychology Jokes

I spent four years at college and didn't learn anything... It's really my own fault. I had a double major in psychology and reverse psychology.

Score: 2421

I wanted to major in reverse psychology. My dream school turned me down.

So I wrote them back and told them I wasn't even interested in their stupid program. They sent me a diploma.

Score: 353
Funny Psychology Jokes
Score: 176

I've written a book about reverse psychology Please don't buy it.

Score: 92

I have degrees in Politics, Economics and Psychology. I don't have a job but at least I know why.

Score: 89

My doctor tried treating me with ygolohcysp But reverse psychology doesn't work on me

Score: 64

I got in trouble for using performance enhancing drugs I took a placebo before my psychology exam

Score: 64

My Psychology Professor asked me what Super Power I would like to have... Apparently "Cold War Era Russia" is not an acceptable answer.

Score: 43

A lot of people think Sigmund Frued is a hack. And yes, some of his theories were proven wrong but the work he did made the field of psychology so famous he should never be forgotten. They just go hand in hand, you cant have one without the mother,

Score: 33

New health study on the psychology of midgets Shows that 6 out of 7 dwarfs aren't happy

Score: 28

I got fired from a suicide hotline Apparently they look down upon reverse psychology.

Score: 21

Did you hear about the prostitute with a PhD in Psychology? She'll blow your mind.

Score: 18

I've just finished a book about reverse psychology. Don't read it.

Score: 17

I didnt learn anything in college... I guess it was kind of my fault though. I double majored in psychology, and reverse psychology.

(Stolen from BJ Novak)

Score: 13

I wrote a book on reverse psychology. Don't buy it!

Score: 12

I’m a psychology student and I love it I guess it’s true that if you do what you love you’ll never work a day in your life

Score: 10

I thought reverse psychology was when.. you made your therapist cry

Score: 8

I'm writing a book on reverse psychology. When it becomes available, please refrain from purchasing it.

Score: 8

I always cheated on my psychology tests... ...so I don't know what that says about me.

Score: 8

A person with an engineering degree asks... ...how things work.

A person with a psychology degree asks why things work.

A person with an art degree asks, "would you like fries with that?"

Score: 8

The psychology lecture randomly picks out one of his students. "Let's say you're the most disagreeable person in this clas-"

"No I'm not."

Score: 8

I have a double major in Psychology and Geography. I lead the field in research on glacial depressions.

Score: 7

Major in Freudian Psychology Minor in the back seat.

Score: 7

I remember learning about Pavlov’s law in psychology class and thinking “those stupid dogs...” Then the bell rang and we all went to lunch

Score: 7

I once knew an axeman who was great at psychology He could really get inside your head

Score: 6

I didn’t learn a thing in university I elected to get a major in psychology and minor in reverse-psychology.

Score: 6

A man walks into a library and says... ..."I hope you don't have a book on reverse psychology."

Score: 5

How physicists see other sciences: Biology: squishy physics
Geology: slow physics
Computer Science: virtual physics
Psychology: people physics
Chemistry: impure physics
Math: physics minus the units

Score: 5

I was in psychology class yesterday... and we couldn't stop laughing at how stupid Pavlov's dogs were.


Then the lunch bell rang and we all had lunch

Score: 5

A girl tells her parents she's going to major in psychology "Hey mom! Hey dad! I'm gonna study a real science! PSYCH!"

Score: 4

I asked my Dad for help with course selection... My last block was either Psychology or Computer Applications. So I asked, "Which do you think I should take?"

"Whichever you'll excel in, son."

Score: 3

My friend asked me how reverse psychology worked I told him he wouldn't understand.

Now he understands!

Score: 3

What did Dr. Cardi B say to her psychology client? So, tell me what occured to you as a child.

Score: 1

Popular Topics