A lamb, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff. *baa-dum-tssssssssss*
How to Fall Down the Stairs
Why did the blind woman fall down the well? Because she couldn't see that well.
Instructions how to fall down stairs:
Why did the hipster fall into the lake? He went ice skating before it was cool.
How to find out if you're old or not: Fall down in front of a group of people. If they laugh, you’re young. If they panic, you’re old.
A goat, a drum, and a rattlesnake fall down a cliff... ba dum tss
Today I saw a poor, old woman trip and fall. At least, I assume she was poor. She only had $4.75 in her purse.
I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice.. At least I presume she was poor - she only had $1.20 in her purse.
Why girls don't have willys Little brother came into the kitchen and declared "mom, now I know why girls don't have willys! They fall off, and I found yours under your pillow"
Why did the blind lady fall into the well? Because... she couldn't see that well.
TIL why scuba divers fall backwards into the water Because if they fall forward, they would land in the boat.
How to fall down stairs
* Step 1
* Step 2
* Step 4
* Step 15
My neighbor blamed my gravel for making him fall But it was his dumb asphalt
I just got my prostate examined. That's the last time I fall asleep on the train.
When inmates fall in love. Do the finish each others sentences?
Why did the blind woman fall into the well? Because she couldn't see that well.
A Sheep, a Drum, and a Snake fall off a cliff Baa-Dumm-Tsss
Why did the blind man fall in the well? Because he couldn’t see that well.
My wife said we needed to childproof our upright piano, so it wouldn't fall over on our toddler... ... I said that was a good idea, because I wouldn't want a flat minor.
Me: It doesn’t matter how many times you fall, what matters is how many times you get back up” Cop: “Sir, that’s not how a sobriety test works.”
I have just written a book on how to fall down a staircase. It's a step by step guide.
How to fall down stairs
Step 8, 9, 11, 12
Why was the UN concerned when the waiter dropped Thanksgiving dinner? Because it meant the fall of turkey, the ruin of grease, and the breakup of china.
You know that tingly sensation you get when you fall in love with somebody? That's common sense leaving your body.
Why did the polynomial tree fall over? It didn't have any real roots
How do you survive a fall without a parachute? Just like any other season
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff... Baa dum tssssss
Two blondes fall down a well One says to the other ones, "isn't it dark down here" she replies, I don't know I can't see
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of the boat? Because if they fell forwards, they’d still be in the boat.
Why do scuba-divers go in backwards? Because if they went forward they'd fall in the boat.
So my girlfriend is getting a bit older and her teeth are starting to fall out. It's okay, though. They'll grow back.
Pride is like the summer... It comes before the fall.
A Sheep, a drum and a snake simultaneously fall from a cliff... Bah Dum Tss
When's the best time to go skydiving? Fall.
Where do pets go when their tails fall off? The retail store
Why do Navy SEALs fall backwards off of their boats? Because if they fell forwards they'd still be on the boat!
What's the difference between a pound of cocaine and a baby? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a pound of coke fall out of a window
Humpty Dumpty had a good Summer... But he had a *great* Fall!
This Fall, I’m finally going to fulfill my lifelong dream of visiting San Francisco and seeing The Golden Gate in person.
My wife said, “What will you do when you finally see it?”
Me: Let’s cross that bridge when we get there.
Why did Weinstein fall sick on way to jail? He was told he is assigned Epstein cell.
I dunno why, but jokes on Flat Earthers always.. Fall flat
My girlfriend fall straight onto my crouch. And then she said, "felatio".
Why did the partially sighted woman fall down a well? Because she couldn't see that well
Following these simple steps, you can learn how to fall down the stairs:
What is orange and impeached? A peach tree in fall.
Why do lions mate in the summer? Pride comes before a fall.
Tutorial: How To Fall Down The Stairs
The car dealership near me is having a fall deal: “You heard it here folks, it’s back, free pumpkin spiced oil changes with every tire change!”
Why did the pirate fall in love with the stable girl? He has a fetish for barn-ankles.
What did the accountant fall off the cliff? he lost his balance
Humnty dumnty was going to a ball
Humnty dumnty got a call
Humnty dumnty’s wife died in a car crash an hour ago
Humnty dumnty had a great fall
How do blind bats fall in love? They just click
If you fall in the river in Paris, what would you be? In Seine.
TIL: Why Scuba Divers have to fall backwards out of the boat If they fell forward they'd still be in the boat
Why did the old man fall in that well? Because he couldn’t see that well
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of their boats? Because if they fell forwards they would still be on the boat.
Whenever I fall short on my steps for the day with my Fitbit I switch it to my dominate arm And end up beating the goal.
Why shouldn’t you wear underpants in Russia? Because Chernobyl fall out
What’s the difference between a 5yo boy and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn’t let cocaine fall off his balcony.
Q. Did you hear about the nuclear disaster in Ukraine - don’t go there! A. Oh - why not?
Chernobyl fall off!
Edit: removed cymbal smash
Don’t buy Ukrainian underwear! Your Chernobyl fall out
Why do scuba divers fall out of the boat backwards? Because, if they fell forwards they’d still be in the boat
Why do scuba divers fall backwards out of their boat? Because if they fall forwards, they’ll still be in the boat.
Why did the big moron fall off and the little moron didn't? Because he was a little moron.
Which city has its seasons reversed? Tornto, the Leafs always fall in the spring
When your friend is scaling a difficult rock face, and you know for certain that they're going to fall, but you agree to hold their rope anyways, you're only belaying the inevitable.
A school robotics team made an ultimate weapon, and needed ammo that makes everything fall apart. That’s why they used common core standards.
I would really love to see Fall Out Boy play at a breast cancer awareness fundraiser Just so they can play their hit song, Thanks For The Mammories
why did dua lipa fall in love with del Potro? because Juan kiss is all it takes.
What’s the biggest difference about Easter when it doesn’t fall on the 20th? The type of grass you fill the basket with
I Heard Minnesota Residents Are Very Excited. Rumor is going around that summer may fall on a weekend this year.
Why did the first monkey fall of the tree?
He was shot.
Why did the second monkey fall of the tree?
He was also shot.
Why did the third monkey fall of the tree?
Why do scuba divers fall backwards into water? Because if they fell forward they'd fall in the boat.
What is Jamie Lanisters favorite breakfast? Fall Bran.
A good friend is like a tree Hit them with an axe and they fall down.
Why is Pride month is Summer? Because Pride comes before a *fall*
A bowling ball and a black man fall out of a tree at the same time and altitude, what hits the ground first?
The bowling ball.
the black man stops at the neck.
My girlfriend warned me the first time I stayed over that, she likes to fall asleep to white noise Turns out she meant leaving the TV on Fox News
I usually say 'Autumn' instead of 'Fall'. Sometimes it can be my downautumn.
Everyone else has 4 seasons to look forward to: Sping, Summer, Fall, & Winter We Seniors have only 1 season: Fall
Why do Scuba divers fall backwards off the boat? Because if they fell forwards they'd still be on the boat
Why are leaves bad material for parachutes? because they don't survive the fall (autumn)
Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off of a boat? If they fell forwards they would still be in the boat
What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of coke? Eric Clapton would've never let a bag of coke fall out the window
What do people drive in the fall? Autumn-mobiles.
How do you make a child fall asleep at night? You scare the living daylights outta them.
A Black Man and a White Man fall out of a tree... Who hits the ground first?
The White Man, of course...
Because the Black man was stopped by the rope.
p.s. Mods, please remove if inappropriate or whatever.
New Feature exclusive to 2015/16 Chevy Trucks Magnetic Bumber; recover the parts as they fall off.
"Hello Mr. Ress, how have you been?" asked the psychologist.
"I feel as though people use me as something to fall back on." he replied.
"And why do you think that is, Matt?"
what's the difference between cocaine and a 4 year old? Eric Clapton would never let cocaine fall out a window
Why is it so hard for New Zealanders to fall asleep? They're too turned on from counting sheep.
Ah Toronto, the only city where the leaves fall in autumn... ...and the Leafs fall in the spring
A big moron and a little moron were sitting on the edge of a cliff.
The big moron fell off. Why didn't the little moron fall off?
- The little moron was a little more on.
Why did Sally Fall off the swing? [kind of rude]
Because she has no arms.
A joke for fall.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves?
How fast does a skydiving cancer patient fall? Terminal velocity.
What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of cocaine?
Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window.
What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of cocaine? eric clapton wont let a bag of cocaine fall out a window.