Hilarious Potato Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Potato Jokes

What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig? Ones a heated yam, and ones a yeeted ham.

Score: 9763

What do you call a reluctant potato? A hesitater

Score: 1135

Score: 545

A man walks up to 3 women wearing potato sacks. How does he know which one is the prostitute? The one whose sack reads "Idaho"

Score: 418

Latvian Joke. What are one potato say other potato?
Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Score: 185

What do a hot potato and a thrown pig have in common? One is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

Score: 182

What do you call an indecisive potato? A HESI-TATER.

Score: 174

I had a 7 course Irish dinner last night A 6 pack of Guinness and a potato

Score: 172

What do you call a high person with Downs Syndrome? A baked potato.

Score: 166

Latvian man goes to buy iPhone.. Premise ridiculous! iPhone cannot be use to farm potato.
Also, salesman die of malnourish.

Score: 104

What do you call a stoner with down syndrome? A baked potato.

Score: 92

Joke from my daughter. What is bruce banners favourite kind of potato?
HULK'S MASH!

no idea where she picked it up from, but it made me chuckle

Score: 83

Not a Latvian joke Lost job and no money for buy potato.

Also is cold.

Regret immigrate to Detroit.

Score: 74

What is an Irish 7-course meal? A 6-pack and a potato.

Score: 67

A man walks into a bar... He sits down and asks the bartender, “do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?”

The bartender replies, “no we only have plane ones.”

Score: 61

I got arrested today for feeding the homeless guys on my street... And to top it off, the cops took away my potato gun.

Score: 54

Latvian potato eating contest. Latvia man enter contest eat potato. Many other contestants. Contest start. Is no potato. All men sad. And hungry.

Score: 48

Boy complains to his father Boy: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing!

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.

Score: 44

What do you call an authoritarian potato? A dicktater.

Score: 44

Roses are red, potato chips are savory... The United States prison system is legalized slavery.

Score: 42

What's the difference between a warm sweet potato and a thrown pig? One is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

Score: 41

What do you call a stoned Irishman? A baked potato.

Score: 40

Why is the demand for potato chips rising in China? They need clean air.

Score: 39

Two potato’s are standing on a corner. How can you tell which one is a prostitute? Look for the sticker that says Idaho.

Score: 37

What's a 7 course meal for an Irishman? A six-pack and a potato.

Score: 35

What do you call a bossy potato... A dicktater

Score: 34

What’s the difference between a baked sweet potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam and the other’s a yeeted ham.

Score: 34

Why Latvian man did cross road? Man have no chicken. All animals are die in famine. Man cross to look for potato. No potato.

Score: 33

What do you call a mean Potato? A Dictator.

Score: 33

Guy walks into a bar He asks the bartender, "Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?" The bartender shakes his head and says, "No, we only have plain."

Score: 29

What's the difference between a chick pea and potato? I've never paid $50 to have a potato on my face.

Score: 20

What do you call a phallic potato? A dictator.

Score: 20

What do you call a potato that becomes US President and silences the news, silences government agencies, silences government funded science and ends international treaties? A dic-tater.

Score: 18

What do you call a spud that smokes weed? A baked potato

Score: 18

ESPN literally hired a potato for one of its broadcasts When asked why they responded that they needed a common tater.

Score: 12

Had Irish 7 coarse meal for lunch today 6 pack and a baked potato. Was delicious!

Score: 11

Why did everyone hate their potato overlord? Because he was a dictator.

Score: 11

What is the difference between a potato and a chickpea? You wouldn't pay to have a potato on you.

Score: 10

When I was a kid, my parents used to give me 10c and I would have to go down to the shop. I would get a pack of Potato’s, a bunch of bananas, 5 loafs of bread and a bottle of beer. But of course, you can’t do that anymore as most stores have security cameras.

Score: 8

What do you call a basic girl in potato themed lingerie A Tator-Thot

Score: 8

New Potato Jokes

What did the girl potato confess to her husband when he caught her cheating? I-da-Ho.

Score: 0

What do you call a lazy weed-user? A baked potato

Score: 0

What do you call a person with down syndrome that smokes weed? A baked potato.

Score: 2

lmao my four-year-old niece told me this joke yesterday Her: Knock knock!

Me: Who's there?

Her: Potato

Me: Potato who?

Her:

▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩☆۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬

𝐄𝐏𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐈𝐍 𝐃𝐈𝐃𝐍'𝐓 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐇𝐈𝐌𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅

▬▬▬▬▬ஜ۩☆۩ஜ▬▬▬▬▬▬

Score: 1

I saw a magician float a potato once.. It was a levitator.

Score: 2

What do you get after giving a joint to a down syndrome kid? A baked potato

Score: 2

What happens when you throw a potato in British fire? They burn into a crisp.



A.N: You have probably heard this before. I swear I am not copying anybody.

Score: 1

What do you call a couch potato on the internet? A youtuber

Score: 2

What do you call a cute irishman A sweet potato

Score: 3

What do you call a dumb stoner who’s been in the sun for too long? A twice baked potato!

Score: 1

What religion is a potato? A Crisp-tian.

Score: 1

What did the latvian say to the ghostbuster? There is no potato, only Zuel

Score: 1

[request] joke about tomatos Anybody got any good potato jokes?

Score: 0

After the high ranking potato official was killed All flags were flown at half-mashed.

Score: 2

Pot1o Pot2o

Pot3o

Pot4o

Pot5o

Pot6o

Pot7o

Potato.

Score: 8

What do you call a potato in a boat? A Row-tato!

Score: 4

Breast implants are like potato chips. You can't have just one.

Score: 7

What do you get when you combine Kim Jong Un and a potato A dictator

Score: 1

What do you call a potato orbiting Earth? Spudnik.

Score: 3

What do you call a fried potato with an oral fixation? A French Freud

Score: 2

What do you call a potato that gives you cancer? A malignant tuber.

Score: 4

What do a bag of Lay's potato chips and the Milky Way have in common? They're both mostly empty space.

Score: 8

What's something that both an American and an Ethiopian can never have? Just one potato chip.

Score: 5

Why was the potato salty? Because he had a chip on his shoulder

Score: 2

Luck "How did you find your steak?" asked the waiter of a patron in the very expensive restaurant. "Just luck," the hungry man replied, sadly. "I happened to move that small piece of potato, and there it was!"

Score: 3

What do you call a potato with glasses? A spec-tater.

Score: 3

What do you call a fake potato? An imitater

Score: 3

What is the difference between a chickpea and a Potato? I've never paid $50 to have a potato on my face

Score: 2

What do you call a nice down syndrome person? Sweet potato.

Score: 3

Swimming pool tips Boy complains to his father: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing!

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.

Score: 5

Which potato speaks to the farmer on behalf of the other potatoes? The omspudsman

Score: 1

What did the potato chip say to the battery? If you're Ever-Ready I'm Frito-Lay!

Score: 4

What's the difference between a potato and your sister? Ones is fat, lumpy and full of carbs. The other is a potato.

Score: 5

What's the difference between a Chickpea and a Potato? I wouldn't pay $50 to have a potato on my face.

Score: 2

Did you hear about the potato that teaches 3rd grade? He's loves being an edutater

Score: 2

What do you call a lazy gangster? A potato Crip.

Score: 3

If a tomato's a tomato and a potato's a potato, what's a pea? A relief.

Score: 1

Family potato My friend hates his surname, Potato.
Not as much as as his wife Jackie does.

Score: 1

A boy potato chip asks a girl potato chip "are you Wise or are you Frito-Lay?"

Score: 1

What do you call the children of a couch potato? Tater tots

Score: 1

What do you call it when an autistic kid smokes weed? Baked Potato

Score: 2

Some people tell me that I'm too sweet to be a potato... But I just can't help it, I yam what I yam.

Score: 7

My dad just stepped on a potato bug... Now it's a mashed potato bug.

Score: 1

Wrong side of the trunks. Boy complains to his father: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing!

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.

Score: 2

The founder of the Lays potato chip company came to Hawaii the other day. As a welcoming gift, we gave him leis.

Score: 1

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

(That's a potato famine joke)

Score: 1

If two vegans fight is it still considered beef? Sorry for the unoriginal joke, have an invisible flying potato.

Score: 2

What did Mr. Potato Head give Mrs. Potato Head on their romantic night out? A good fingerling.

Score: 1

I found a potato shaped like Fidel Castro It's a dictator.

Score: 4

What do you call a mentally challenged person on drugs? Baked Potato

Score: 2

Two Latvian men are talking to each other... Two Latvian men are talking to each other.

The first says "I have joke for you. What did one potato say to other?"

The second says "Nothing. Nobody have two potato."

Score: 6

I am tell Latvian joke... Why Latvian take so good pictures?

No potato.

Score: 1

How many Latvian to eat potato? soldier

Score: 2