Potato Jokes

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Funniest Potato Jokes

What’s the difference between a hot potato and a flying pig? Ones a heated yam, and ones a yeeted ham.

Score: 9763

What do you call a reluctant potato? A hesitater

Score: 1135
Funny Potato Jokes
Score: 545

A man walks up to 3 women wearing potato sacks. How does he know which one is the prostitute? The one whose sack reads "Idaho"

Score: 418

Latvian Joke. What are one potato say other potato?
Premise ridiculous. Who have two potato?

Score: 185

What do a hot potato and a thrown pig have in common? One is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

Score: 182

What do you call an indecisive potato? A HESI-TATER.

Score: 174

I had a 7 course Irish dinner last night A 6 pack of Guinness and a potato

Score: 172

What do you call a high person with Downs Syndrome? A baked potato.

Score: 166

Latvian man goes to buy iPhone.. Premise ridiculous! iPhone cannot be use to farm potato.
Also, salesman die of malnourish.

Score: 104

What do you call a stoner with down syndrome? A baked potato.

Score: 92

Joke from my daughter. What is bruce banners favourite kind of potato?
HULK'S MASH!

no idea where she picked it up from, but it made me chuckle

Score: 83

Not a Latvian joke Lost job and no money for buy potato.

Also is cold.

Regret immigrate to Detroit.

Score: 74

What is an Irish 7-course meal? A 6-pack and a potato.

Score: 67

A man walks into a bar... He sits down and asks the bartender, “do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?”

The bartender replies, “no we only have plane ones.”

Score: 61

I got arrested today for feeding the homeless guys on my street... And to top it off, the cops took away my potato gun.

Score: 54

Latvian potato eating contest. Latvia man enter contest eat potato. Many other contestants. Contest start. Is no potato. All men sad. And hungry.

Score: 48

Boy complains to his father Boy: You told me to put a potato in my swimming trunks! You said it would impress the girls at the pool! But you forgot to mention one thing! 

Father: Really, what?

Boy: That the potato should go in the front.

Score: 44

What do you call an authoritarian potato? A dicktater.

Score: 44

Roses are red, potato chips are savory... The United States prison system is legalized slavery.

Score: 42

What's the difference between a warm sweet potato and a thrown pig? One is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

Score: 41

What do you call a stoned Irishman? A baked potato.

Score: 40

Why is the demand for potato chips rising in China? They need clean air.

Score: 39

Two potato’s are standing on a corner. How can you tell which one is a prostitute? Look for the sticker that says Idaho.

Score: 37

What's a 7 course meal for an Irishman? A six-pack and a potato.

Score: 35

What’s the difference between a baked sweet potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam and the other’s a yeeted ham.

Score: 34

What do you call a bossy potato... A dicktater

Score: 34

Why Latvian man did cross road? Man have no chicken. All animals are die in famine. Man cross to look for potato. No potato.

Score: 33

What do you call a mean Potato? A Dictator.

Score: 33

Guy walks into a bar He asks the bartender, "Do you have any helicopter flavored potato chips?" The bartender shakes his head and says, "No, we only have plain."

Score: 29

What did the potato name his son? Chip.


Sorry.

Score: 22

This Halloween, I put a potato in my pants and ordered people around. I was a dictator.

Score: 16

Why couldn't the potato get off the couch? Because it was baked.

Score: 14

What is the difference between a potato and a chickpea? You wouldn't pay to have a potato on you.

Score: 10

One Latvian potato talking to another. Is bad premise, nobody in Latvia have two potato.

Score: 8

When I was a kid, my parents used to give me 10c and I would have to go down to the shop. I would get a pack of Potato’s, a bunch of bananas, 5 loafs of bread and a bottle of beer. But of course, you can’t do that anymore as most stores have security cameras.

Score: 8

Two Latvian men are talking to each other... Two Latvian men are talking to each other.

The first says "I have joke for you. What did one potato say to other?"

The second says "Nothing. Nobody have two potato."

Score: 6

What do you call a stoner with Down's Syndrome? A Baked Potato.

Score: 5

What's something that both an American and an Ethiopian can never have? Just one potato chip.

Score: 5

I found a potato shaped like Fidel Castro It's a dictator.

Score: 4

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New Potato Jokes

What did the potato couple, Mr. and Mrs. Tott, name their potato son? Tate R. Tott!

Score: 0

How did the potato get the dogs to be quiet? By saying, "hush puppies!"

Score: 2

What's the best thing about being Mr. Potato Head? You get to pick your nose.

Score: 1

What did Mario day when Peach asked him to fix some potato pasta? Gnocchi doki!

Score: 0

What did the girl potato confess to her husband when he caught her cheating? I-da-Ho.

Score: 0

What do you call a lazy weed-user? A baked potato

Score: 0

I saw a magician float a potato once.. It was a levitator.

Score: 2

What do you get after giving a joint to a down syndrome kid? A baked potato

Score: 2

What happens when you throw a potato in British fire? They burn into a crisp.

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A.N: You have probably heard this before. I swear I am not copying anybody.

Score: 1

What do you call a couch potato on the internet? A youtuber

Score: 2

What do you call a cute irishman A sweet potato

Score: 3

What do you call a dumb stoner who’s been in the sun for too long? A twice baked potato!

Score: 1

What religion is a potato? A Crisp-tian.

Score: 1

What did the latvian say to the ghostbuster? There is no potato, only Zuel

Score: 1

[request] joke about tomatos Anybody got any good potato jokes?

Score: 0

What do you call a nice down syndrome person? Sweet potato.

Score: 3

Did you hear about the potato that teaches 3rd grade? He's loves being an edutater

Score: 2

If a tomato's a tomato and a potato's a potato, what's a pea? A relief.

Score: 1

What do you call it when an autistic kid smokes weed? Baked Potato

Score: 2

The founder of the Lays potato chip company came to Hawaii the other day. As a welcoming gift, we gave him leis.

Score: 1

I am tell Latvian joke... Why Latvian take so good pictures?

No potato.

Score: 1

Why is Latvian cross road? Latvian see potato, but when cross is only secret police.

Score: 2

I have a Latvian Joke Man has potato, man trade potato for magic bean.
Magic bean grow into tentacles, rape daughter.

Score: 2

Came up with this one for my brother's birthday: What do you call a retarded Jew during the holocaust?

A baked potato.

Score: 1

How many Latvian to eat potato? soldier

Score: 2

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