Stephen Hawking Jokes

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Funniest Stephen Hawking Jokes

Funny Stephen Hawking Jokes
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Everyone is a fan of Stephen Hawking now that he died. I bet they can't name even 3 of his songs.

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“There is no God” -Stephen Hawking, 2011 “There is no Stephen Hawking” God, 2018

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What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes? Nothing.

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I've tried calling Stephen Hawking many times I keep getting his answering machine

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

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First Stephen Hawking, now Avicii? Tough year for the Electronic community.

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Why is Stephen Hawking successful? He can't run away from his responsibilities.

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So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... Just kidding.

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First Stephen hawking now Avicii It must be a tough year for the electronic community.

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What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie? Stephen Hawking doesn't walkie or talkie.

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer broke?

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Why does Stephen Hawking only do one line jokes? Because he can't do stand-up.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... ... Just kidding

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A fish, a snake, and Stephen Hawking walk into a bar... Just kidding. None of those things walk.

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What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? The computer runs.

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Stephen Hawking has finally released his new book about space. It's about time, too.

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Why can't Stephen Hawking dance? Because he's white.

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I finally got around to reading that book by Stephen Hawking. It was about time.

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What did Stephen Hawking say after his computer crashed ? Nothing.

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My biology teacher asked me what was the ugliest vegetable IMO. Apparently, Stephen Hawking was the wrong answer.

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Stephen Hawking diagnosed with erectile dysfunction. It was easy to fix, they just uninstalled his pop-up blocker.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... It's a miracle.

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Why does Stephen Hawking date African Americans? Because he loves to study black holes.

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I gotta hand it to Stephen Hawking because he can't catch.

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Stephen Hawking can be pretty funny sometimes, But I dont think he could do standup

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Apparently Stephen Hawking is in hospital after he went on a date last night... She stood him up.

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Did Stephen Hawking have a donor card? . .Cos I really need bits for my kids go-kart

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Sometimes I feel like Stephen Hawking in the morning Because I can't get out of bed.

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Stephen Hawking If Stephen hawking started a company, What would his position in the company be?



The Chairman

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What do you call a hand job from Stephen Hawking? A stroke of Genius.

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I finally got round to reading that Stephen Hawking book the other day. It's about time.

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Stephen Hawking is a very paranoid man He's always looking over his shoulder.

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I tried calling Stephen Hawking the other day But I kept getting his answering machine

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Have you seen Stephen Hawking's new communication device? It really speaks for itself.

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What's black and sits at the the top of a staircase ? Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

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What's black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawkings after a house fire.

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What was Stephen Hawking when he was younger? Stephen Walking

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Stephen Hawking recently released his most recent book. He has spent the last 15 years writing it. It's about time.

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Stephen Hawking had his first date for 10 years last week. He came back, his glasses were smashed, he had a broken wrist, a twisted ankle and grazed knees... Apparently she stood him up!

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New Stephen Hawking Jokes

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he is hooked into? The computer actually runs

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What’s the opposite of Stephen Hawking ? Stephen Walking.

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Stephen Hawking asked Albert Einstein "What do you want for your birthday?". He responded, "You.".

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If Kevin Spacey's next role was playing Stephen Hawking How would that grab you?

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How do we know it’s Stephen Hawking talking and not just the black box? There are no ads.

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What do you call a vegetable that's sorta cool? Stephen Hawking

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What vegetable makes you smarter? Stephen Hawking

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What if Stephen Hawking is the real slim shady But we never knew because he can't stand up.

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What’s black and sits at the top of the staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire

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Stephen Hawking If you lose Stephen Hawking, do you report a missing person or a stolen laptop?

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Why is Stephen Hawking a bad comedian? He can't do stand-up.

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What is black and sits at the top of a staircase? Stephen Hawking after a house fire.

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I like to be positive Even though I'm unemployed and recently got evicted, I could still destroy Stephen Hawking in a 100m dash.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar… Just kidding.

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What do Stephen Hawking and Richard Hammond have in common? They both have poor motor skills.

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What's Stephen Hawking's least favorite kind of comedy? Standup.

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TIL Stephen Hawking is British Never realized because of his accent.

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There's only one vegetable I like Stephen Hawking

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his communication device hit an error? body.exe unable to run

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Stephen Hawking is a terrible role model for our kids. He only looks one way when crossing the street

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Did you know that Stephen Hawking wrote a cookbook? It's called A Brief History of Thyme.

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Stephen Hawking walked into a bar... Just kidding.

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Apparently, anything Stephen Hawking reads is considered a "short story" Since he can read it in one sitting

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What do Evel Knievel and Stephen Hawking have in common? Their love of ramps.

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So one day Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... Lol, Just kidding.

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whats black and sits at the top of the staircase? stephen hawking after a house fire

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What has legs but never runs? Stephen Hawking

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Walking Talking Stephen Hawking

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What's black and sits on top of a staircase? Stephen Hawking in a house fire.

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Why is Stephen Hawking so controversial? He never changes his position.

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