Stephen Hawking Jokes

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Funniest Stephen Hawking Jokes

Funny Stephen Hawking Jokes
Score: 1598

Everyone is a fan of Stephen Hawking now that he died. I bet they can't name even 3 of his songs.

Score: 726

“There is no God” -Stephen Hawking, 2011 “There is no Stephen Hawking” God, 2018

Score: 591

What does Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashes? Nothing.

Score: 523

I've tried calling Stephen Hawking many times I keep getting his answering machine

Score: 417

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

Score: 324

First Stephen Hawking, now Avicii? Tough year for the Electronic community.

Score: 202

Why is Stephen Hawking successful? He can't run away from his responsibilities.

Score: 200

So Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... Just kidding.

Score: 166

First Stephen hawking now Avicii It must be a tough year for the electronic community.

Score: 165

What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a walkie-talkie? Stephen Hawking doesn't walkie or talkie.

Score: 163

What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer broke?

Score: 144

Why does Stephen Hawking only do one line jokes? Because he can't do stand-up.

Score: 140

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... ... Just kidding

Score: 122

A fish, a snake, and Stephen Hawking walk into a bar... Just kidding. None of those things walk.

Score: 122

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he’s hooked up to? The computer runs.

Score: 116

Stephen Hawking has finally released his new book about space. It's about time, too.

Score: 113

Why can't Stephen Hawking dance? Because he's white.

Score: 112

I finally got around to reading that book by Stephen Hawking. It was about time.

Score: 112

What did Stephen Hawking say after his computer crashed ? Nothing.

Score: 88

Stephen Hawking diagnosed with erectile dysfunction. It was easy to fix, they just uninstalled his pop-up blocker.

Score: 65

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar... It's a miracle.

Score: 58

Why does Stephen Hawking date African Americans? Because he loves to study black holes.

Score: 53

Stephen Hawking can be pretty funny sometimes, But I dont think he could do standup

Score: 50

I gotta hand it to Stephen Hawking because he can't catch.

Score: 50

Apparently Stephen Hawking is in hospital after he went on a date last night... She stood him up.

Score: 44

Did Stephen Hawking have a donor card? . .Cos I really need bits for my kids go-kart

Score: 42

Sometimes I feel like Stephen Hawking in the morning Because I can't get out of bed.

Score: 40

Stephen Hawking If Stephen hawking started a company, What would his position in the company be?



The Chairman

Score: 40

What do you call a hand job from Stephen Hawking? A stroke of Genius.

Score: 37

2 "black" questions that aren't racist. What's black and sits at the top of the stairs? Stephen Hawking in a house fire.

What's black and screaming? Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

Score: 26

Have you seen Stephen Hawking's new communication device? It really speaks for itself.

Score: 21

What happened when Stephen Hawking's wife gave him a handjob? She had a stroke of genius.

Score: 18

Stephen Hawking recently released his most recent book. He has spent the last 15 years writing it. It's about time.

Score: 14

What’s the difference between Stephen Hawking and the computer he is hooked into? The computer actually runs

Score: 4

Why is Stephen Hawking a bad comedian? He can't do stand-up.

Score: 3

What did Stephen Hawking say when his communication device hit an error? body.exe unable to run

Score: 2

When Stephen Hawking was found dead yesterday... Did they call the paramedics or the IT guys first?

Score: 2

Stephen Hawking asked Albert Einstein "What do you want for your birthday?". He responded, "You.".

Score: 2

What’s the opposite of Stephen Hawking ? Stephen Walking.

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New Stephen Hawking Jokes

Stephen Hawking is such a bad comedian He can't do Stand Up.

Score: 2

Apparently Stephen hawking isn't dead!! He fell asleep, someone just had to wiggle the mouse

Score: 1

If Kevin Spacey's next role was playing Stephen Hawking How would that grab you?

Score: 1

What vegetable makes you smarter? Stephen Hawking

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