Dyslexic Jokes

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Funniest Dyslexic Jokes

A dyslexic man stormed Area 15 Authorities didn't press charges, saying "they felt bad"

They thought a long sentence was the last thing he needed

Score: 20636

They told me i wouldn’t be good at poetry because i’m dyslexic But so far I’ve made 3 jugs and a vase and they are lovely.

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Funny Dyslexic Jokes
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Why can't a dyslexic be a witch? You need to be good at spelling.

Score: 786

What do you get if you cross an agnostic, a dyslexic and an insomniac? Someone who lays awake at night, wondering if there is a dog.

Score: 686

RIP to my good friend Brian... ...eaten by a pack of dyslexic zombies :(

Score: 671

Did you hear about the dyslexic KKK member? He went around killing gingers.

Score: 461

Why can't dyslexic people tell jokes? Because they always punch up the fuckline

Score: 369

Did you hear about the dyslexic racist? He hates gingers.

Score: 329

I'm an agnostic, an insomniac, and a dyslexic Every night I lie awake wondering if there really is a dog.

Score: 253

Did you hear about the dyslexic KKK member? He really hates gingers

Score: 230

I've been texting this cute dyslexic girl. I think she likes me, but she keeps sending mixed messages.

Score: 190

A dyslexic friend of mine thought it might help his condition if he joined a poetry club. He hasn't come out with any poems yet, but he's made some pretty nice jugs and vases and stuff.

Score: 184

Why couldn't the dyslexic plantation owner get anything done? Gingers just don't last in the sun.

Score: 176

Did you hear about the dyslexic racist? He hated gingers.

Score: 153

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Association

Score: 139

I once met a dyslexic stripper named Density

Score: 139

What does a dyslexic klan member hate? Gingers

Score: 130

Why did the dyslexic wizard get kicked out of school? He couldn't spell

Score: 106

I went on a date with a dyslexic girl, and she ended up cooking my sock.

Score: 100

Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? Poor guy - he stayed up all night wondering if there was a dog.

Score: 95

My dyslexic French friend said he owed me some money.... OUI.

Score: 89

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his​ soul to santa.

Score: 75

A dyslexic man walks into a bra thats it, thats the joke

Score: 72

How is a dyslexic stand-up like an MMA fighter who comes home to find his GF in a gangbang? They both punchup the fuckline.

Score: 62

Did you hear about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul to Santa.

Score: 62

I was watching the Dyslexic news channel earlier. Apparently North Korea are making unclear threats to the US.

Score: 61

A dyslexic man walks into a bra Either way he's getting at least two cups

Score: 59

I met a dyslexic woman at a bar last night... I took her home and she ended up cooking my sock.

Score: 55

Me and a dyslexic are sitting in a tree... K. S. I. S. I. N. G.

Score: 54

One in our friend group is supposed to be a dyslexic junkie. Needels to say it's not me.

Score: 54

What does an insomniac, agnostic, dyslexic do? Stays up at night sleepless, wondering endlessly if there really is a dog.

Score: 46

Dyslexic criminals love weed. It's the ultimate getaway drug.

Score: 46

I work with the DNA The National Dyslexic association.

Score: 45

I'm a dyslexic tree... My life is A-OK!

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I'm a dyslexic agnostic insomniac I stay up all night wondering if there is a dog

Score: 42

Why did dyslexic Karen go to the Christmas nativity? To see the manger.

Score: 42

What does a dyslexic atheist with insomnia do? Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Score: 42

I'm an agnostic dyslexic insomniac I lay awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Score: 39

What is a dyslexic person's preferred alternative energy source? It's unclear

Score: 39

It's not easy being a dyslexic devil worshiper If you're not careful, you could end up selling your soul to Santa

Score: 38

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New Dyslexic Jokes

Two miners walk into the bar Then the dyslexic bouncer kicked them out.

Score: 1

What's the worst kind of genealogist? A dyslexic one

Credit to my boyfriend as he came up with this while talking about how bad my dyslexia is.

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What says zzub and flies? A dyslexic bee.

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In 2011 dyslexic Navy SEAL team stormed a home furnishing store in Pakistan They were looking for bed linen.

Score: 1

What happens when you hit someone dyslexic very hard on the head? Drain bamage

And potentially jail time.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic? He laid awake all night wondering if there really was a dog.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp? He ended up buying a warehouse.

Score: 25

Someone told me that DNA stands for Deoxyribonucleic Acid Does it not stand for National Dyslexic Association?

Score: 13

Why does a Dyslexic Ship Captain with Coprophobia never pay his taxes? He’s afraid of the Sea’s Fee.

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My dyslexic support group held a slam poetry competition Doug got first with a great piece about racial tensions in America.

Anna got second with a touching monologue about women's rights.

I got third by smashing an urn.

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I have a dyslexic friend. He walked into a bra

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What was the dyslexic kids favourite video game system? Nintendo 46

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I used to know this dyslexic guy that would always get himself into awkward situations He never could read a room

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As a dyslexic I've been stung for taking phrases literally If beauty really lies with the beeholder I've yet to meet one.

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What do the initials D.S.A.U stand for ? United States Dyslexic Association

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The doctor told him some bad news. A few years ago a friend of mine tried to commit suicide, he had gone to the doctor for test results and found out he was dyslexic he was so upset he went outside and jumped behind a bus.

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Most people love Dogs But dyslexic people worship them!

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my dyslexic online friend who always act sad finally commit he said"i have crippling description"

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[insert title here] A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Have you heard about the dyslexic who was working too hard on his imagination skills? He ended up in Santa Fe.

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Your Honor, I'm dyslexic I couldn't possibly finish my sentence

Score: 11

What did the dyslexic man order at the Italian restaurant? Tapas

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I pity the poor insomniac dyslexic agnostic He sits up all night wondering if there is a dog.

Score: 7

Breaking news. Dyslexic man self sellotapes..

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What did the dyslexic Zombie crave? Brians

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What dyslexic guy did during quarantine? He satanized the house.

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How did the dyslexic man commit suicide? He jumped behind the bus.

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They told me I wouldn't be any good at poetry because I was dyslexic But so far I've made 3 jugs and a vase and they're lovely

Score: 6

Where did the dyslexic Rastafarian go on holiday? Yeman

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Did you hear about the dyslexic that committed suicide? He jumped behind a sub.

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Dyslexic man walks into A bra

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What do you call a dyslexic Jedi with cancer? Leuk.

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What does a dyslexic pirate say? RRRRRRA!!!!

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Did you hear about the dyslexic Satanist? They got Christmas presents

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What does the agnostic dyslexic insomniac suffer from? He lies awake every night wondering if there is a dog.

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Have you heard of the dyslexic pirate lately ? Last time I have heard from him he was taking a sheep.

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BREAKING NEWS: A local dyslexic man, has committed a murder suicide at his family home. His wife and kids remain unharmed.

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As if being dyslexic wasn't bad enough! Now I read I might have racoon virus!

Score: 9

What would a dyslexic wizards favourite spell be? Edit: Spelling

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My dyslexic uncle always recited the same proverb whenever I asked him why he hadn’t ordered his dyslexia corrective glasses: Never get done today what can be put off tomorrow

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Did you hear about the dyslexic dwarf? It's not big and it's not clever

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Today, I discovered what DNA stands for. National Dyslexic Association.

Score: 18

BREAKING: A dyslexic terrorist had stormed the zoo He has taken 6 ostriches

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Dyslexic Shakespeare <Exeunt, usurped by a bear.>

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Why can't dyslexic people use the internet in China? Because they get a virus when they open a bat

Score: 5

Have you heard about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He lays awake at night wondering if there’s a Dog

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I am a dyslexic with an obsession with 80s experimental music. I can Phil it Collin in the air tonight

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A group of dyslexic men form a soccer team When they got down to the name of their team they went with "Dyslexia untied"

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Dear Dairy, Stop telling everyone I'm dyslexic every time I write you these letters!

-Joe

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A dyslexic shop owner got an order for sanitization equipment The buyers were confused as the shop owner delivered to them anesthesia, a pair of tongs and wire cutters

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Have you heard about the dyslexic pimp? He bought a wharehouse.

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Why did the dyslexic man apply to work at the IRS to improve his resume? He heard everything’s bigger in taxes

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What's a dyslexic turkey's favorite word game? Gobble

Score: 1

My brothers and I were sitting around making up jokes about fruit. Here is mine:

What fruit is dyslexic and asks to do things?










A persimmon.

Score: 3

As a dyslexic rapper, It's hard to release a distract without getting disstracked.

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What do dyslexic atheists believe? That there is no dog.

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What does a dyslexic agnostic insomniac do at night time? Lie in bed, wondering if there is a dog

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Hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He stayed up all night wondering if there's a dog.

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Did you hear about the agnostic, dyslexic insomniac? She stayed up all night, wondering if there really was a Dog.

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Dyslexic Racists Hate gingers

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What do you do as a Dyslexic Insomniac Atheist? You stay up all night questioning the existence of a dog.

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