Vasectomy Jokes

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Funniest Vasectomy Jokes

Funny Vasectomy Jokes
Score: 12385

I thought a vasectomy wouldn't get my wife pregnant.. Turns out, all it does is just change the color of the baby.

Score: 5690

I got a vasectomy but my gf still got pregnant. Apparently, all a vasectomy does is change the color of the baby.

Score: 3404

I had a vasectomy because I didn’t want kids. But when I got home they were still there.

Score: 2103

My wife made me promise to stop making stupid jokes So I got a vasectomy

Score: 1401

I got a vasectomy but my girlfriend still had a baby... ...apparently all a vasectomy does is change the colour of the baby.

Score: 468

After my vasectomy I thought I couldn't get my wife pregenant Apparently it just changes the color of the baby

Score: 407

Two women are discussing their love lives Jo says: "I have to be careful not to get pregnant."

Jenny looks confused. "But I thought Tony recently had a vasectomy."

"He did." says Jo. "That's why I need to be extra careful."

Score: 361

I was disappointed to find out a vasectomy doesn’t prevent you from getting your wife pregnant. It just changes the color of the baby. :(

Score: 236

I had a vasectomy. Did you know that it actually doesn't prevent your wife from getting pregnant it just changes the color of the baby. Or at least that's what my mailman said.

Score: 210

I had vasectomy so my wife wouldn't get pregnant... But apparently all it does is change the color of your baby

Score: 201

So I got a vasectomy... Turns out it just changes the colour of the baby.

Score: 160

I got a vasectomy but my wife still got pregnant Apparently all it does is change the color of the baby

Score: 156

I thought my vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant..... Turns out it just changes the color of the baby.

Score: 125

I was told a vasectomy would prevent my wife and I from having a baby... Turns out it just turns the baby black.

Score: 97

I got a vasectomy but my wife still got pregnant. Apparently all a vasectomy does is change the color of the baby.

Score: 87

I thought my vasectomy would stop my wife from getting pregnant. But it turns out it just changes the colour of the baby

Score: 84

Didn't want to have children any more so I went and got a vasectomy But when I came home they were still here...

Score: 83

I got a vasectomy. But my girlfriend still got pregnant.... Apparently, all a vasectomy does is change the colour of the baby.

Score: 82

I thought getting a vasectomy would keep my wife from getting pregnant. Apparently it just changes the color of the baby.

Score: 77

I thought getting a vasectomy would prevent my wife from getting pregnant... But apparently it just changes the color of the baby

Score: 72

I got a vasectomy two years ago. Turns out is doesn't stop you from having kids, they just come out in different colours.

Score: 58

I went for a vasectomy the other day because I don't want to have any children I don't think it worked though, because when I got home they were still there.

Score: 52

I thought getting a vasectomy would prevent my wife from getting pregnant I thought getting a vasectomy would prevent my wife from getting pregnant.

Apparently, all it does is change the color of the baby.

Score: 49

I had a vasectomy because I didn't want any more children. Apparently a vasectomy doesn't stop you from having children, it only changes the colour of their skin.

Score: 48

Two men discuss vasectomies... First: "I'm thinking about getting a vasectomy, but I'm worried about performance..."
Second:" I had one, I was worried at first but after a while I realized there just wasn't a vas deferens"

Score: 47

if a fat doctor gives you a vasectomy, why should you ask him about the weather? because he's a meaty urologist!

Score: 42

I thought my secret vasectomy would just keep my wife from getting pregnant, but sometimes...... ... it just changes the color of the baby.

Score: 42

My Boss thought that getting a vasectomy would keep his wife from getting pregnant. All it did was change the color of the baby.

Score: 39

I thought getting a vasectomy would prevent birth But apparently it just changes the color of the baby.

Score: 39

I got a vasectomy and my girlfriend still got pregnant. Apparently all a vasectomy does is change the colour of the baby.

Score: 28

I got a vasectomy I was told it would keep her from getting pregnant, turns out all it does is change the color of the baby.

Score: 22

Vasectomy or no vasectomy, Vas the deferens.


(I'll show myself out)

Score: 21

I really counted on my vasectomy to keep my girl from getting pregnant... but apparently it only changes the baby's skin color...

Score: 20

Can't get pregnant Stacy: I have to be very careful, i just can't get pregnant now.

Tiffany: Didn't your husband get a vasectomy?

Stacy: Exactly!

Edit: a word

Score: 18

My wife told me to get a vasectomy to stop her from getting pregnant. But it turns out it just made our baby black.

Score: 11

I had a vasectomy. The doctors will tell you that you won't be able to have kids anymore. I'm here to tell you that it just changes the color of the kids. #stayinformed

Score: 7

I got a vasectomy so I wouldn't have anymore children, Turns out, vasectomy only changes the color of your child.

Score: 5

Everyone said life would be different after my vasectomy But there hasn't been a vas deferens

Score: 5

My uncle got a vasectomy, but couldn't afford to pay the medical bill... So the finance company came to his house and knocked up my aunt.

Score: 4

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Man, those credit card companies are brutal! My buddy got a vasectomy and put it on card and never paid the bill. MasterCard sent a guy over to knock-up his wife.

Score: 2

I didn't want children any more so I went and got my vasectomy.... Came home later and they were still here...

Score: 3

A doctor asks his German patient how his life has been post vasectomy "No vas deferens" the man replies

Score: 3

The wife of a man who just got a vasectomy compares the before and after. She said there wasn’t a vast difference.

Score: 2

I have almost nothing in common with my co-worker, but he was very supportive of me after I got a vasectomy. He's actually a good friend to me now, which you wouldn't expect considering the vas deferens between us.

Score: 2

The first doctor to ever perform a vasectomy... Really got the ball rolling.

Score: 3

I got vasectomy thinking it would stop me from making any more babies... Turns out, it just makes them a different color.

Score: 2

What's worse than finding your parent's condoms? Finding your parent's condoms after they told you your dad had a vasectomy.

Score: 0

What's the difference between a guy with a vasectomy and a guy without a vasectomy? There's a vas deferens.

Score: 2

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