Comedy Jokes

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Funniest Comedy Jokes

Funny Comedy Jokes
Score: 1694

If comedy = tragedy + time, what's comedy + time? A repost.

Score: 1683

What does the narcissistic cow say? "Meeeeee!"

I wrote this.
I'm now a comedy writer.
You are welcome.

Score: 1113

Last night I went to a comedy and philosophy convention. Laughed more than I thought.

Score: 417

Dark comedy is like food. Not everyone gets it.

Score: 241

I'm halfway through becoming a stand up comedian I can stand up, now all I need is comedy

Score: 145

If Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider and Dennis Dugan are in a plane and the plane crashes, who will survive? American comedy films.

Score: 132

Here is some comedy gold for you ,d Au

Score: 123

My life is like a romantic comedy Except there's no romance and it's just me laughing at my own jokes.

> HA! Hilarious and original! Encore!

Score: 88

Had to stop following Business Insider for the headline: "Amy Schumer's new comedy movie is shockingly awful" I can't trust anybody who finds that shocking.

Score: 38

Everyone laughed at me when I said I wanted to do stand up comedy Well, no one's laughing now

Score: 32

3 American Comedy shows walk into a bar and... This punchline is not available in your country.

Sorry about that.

Score: 28

A programmer tries his hand at stand-up comedy: "Forward-slash forward-slash a man walks into a bar..." A heckler yells at him: "Why do you keep doing that weird forward-slash thing?!"

He responds: "Don't you know? The best jokes are always in the comments."

Score: 28

What’s Elon Musk’s favourite comedy? Bambi

Score: 28

A lot of comedy today is observational humor You guys ever noticed that?

Score: 26

I once entered ten puns in a comedy competition hoping one would win. But, no pun in ten did.

Score: 25

My friend had purchased an extra stand-up comedy ticket for me. I turned him down. After all, I could never enjoy jokes at other people's expense.

Score: 22

One thing a paralyzed person can not do is? Stand up comedy

Score: 21

What's a Russian's favorite form of comedy? Tsarcasm :D

Score: 19

What do you get when you combine tragedy and comedy? American politics.

Score: 17

Sean Connery only asked his wife to sit on his face once. ** comedy silence **

Score: 17

What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Roberto

I would like my comedy award now please

Score: 16

My life is like a romantic comedy... except there's no romance and I'm the only one who laughs at my jokes.

Score: 16

There's an ISIS comedy night coming up... I would go but i'm fairly certain they're all going to bomb.

Score: 13

I know many handicapped people with a great sense of humour. Shame they don't do stand-up comedy.

Score: 13

I really hate being a comedian so I broke my legs Guess who’s not doing stand up comedy

Score: 13

Dark Comedy A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she's seeing someone. It's either really terrible news or really great news.

Score: 13

What did Ernie say when Bert asked him if he wanted some ice cream? Sherbert.

(I can't take credit for this amazing piece of comedy. Heard it from a friend, no idea if he came up with it or not.)

Score: 12

This mnemonic joke helps you remember the alphabet... Acronym


Based


Comedy

Doesn't

Ever

Feel


Good

Honestly,

I

Just

Keep

Lamenting

My

Negative

Opinion,

Perhaps

Questioning

Reality


Serves

The


Universe

Very

Well

...


Xylophone, yak, zebra.

Score: 12

Facebook and basic cable Reading Facebook feels like I'm watching basic cable in a hotel: All I want is Comedy Central, but all I can find is the Food Network, workout infomercials and Fox News.

Score: 11

Louis CK returned to the stage last night with a 15 minute set at the Comedy Store in New York. He needed the exposure.

Score: 9

I told my wife I was going to do stand-up comedy She said, "You're joking"

I said, "I told you I was good"

Score: 8

Yesterday, I had a blast roasting this random fat guy in a comedy club the audience loved it but some said it was a little too spicy for their taste.

Score: 7

A sitcom about a 9/11 hijacker was in the works for Comedy Central But it never made it past the pilot episode

Score: 7

I went to a comedy club the other night, and the comedian didn't show up. No joke.

Score: 6

I heard some of the jokes on this subreddit don't sit to well with y'all... How 'bout some stand up comedy instead?

Score: 5

Why can’t OJ Simpson go to a comedy club? Because his jokes kill them every time.

Score: 5

I saw Comedy Central launch a funny non-political TV show... Then I woke up

Score: 3

I took my blind friend to go see stand up comedy once after the viewing had ended, he told me that the jokes were so old, lame, and boring that even he could have seen them coming.

Score: 3

I'm opening a Comedy Club on the beach. Comic Sands.

Score: 3

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New Comedy Jokes

I tried stand up comedy once I got kicked out for “interrupting”.
Apparently you aren’t supposed to shout “comedy” during someone’s performance

Score: 0

What do you call it when you give a gold award to a joke? Comedy gold.

Score: 0

A social activist was performing a standup routine at his local comedy club. He always had trouble getting his message heard, but tonight for some reason, his ideas were really popular. The real comment is always in the jokes

Score: 0

Feminist and comedy are like anti-vaxxers and children. You don't mix the two

Score: 0

You shouldn't do puns at a comedy show They're groaners not showners.

Score: 1

My roomate invited me to go out to a comedy club because he wanted some comedy in his life. I promptly told him to look in the mirror.

Score: 0

I tried doing stand up comedy as a paraplegic It didn’t work out

Score: 3

I am going through a nasty, unmutual divorce because she didn't love me anymore, and my new girlfriend is a paralegal who is helping me file. There is no punchline. I just can't help but laugh at this weird comedy sketch I've been thrust into.

Score: 2

I attended a comedy seminar once... It was horrible, they needed more trees. Because comedy comes in trees.

Score: 3

I used to want to do stand up comedy. Both my legs and dreams were crushed the next day

Score: 2

What is wheelchair users' favourite type of comedy? Stand-up comedy.



This is just a joke please don't consider it as offensive.

Score: 3

What's so offensive about short people jokes? I consider them the height of comedy

Score: 2

How many Netflix documentaries will be made about the corruption of the Trump administration once a new leader is in office? 1, since every comedian is getting their own comedy special.

Score: 3

I was invited to do a comedy stand-up routine at the local Dyslexia Association's Gala Dinner. When I went on stage and was announced as a comedian, one of the audience shouted "Go on then,let's see you change colour"

Score: 1

I've recently written a romantic comedy It's about a guy and a girl - *classic.*

Initially, they hate each other - *classic.*

But they end up in bed together - *classic!*

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It's called: "The Rapist"

Score: 2

Everyone critizes Gwyneth Paltrow's website, but I'm a big fan of "Goop" It's a great source of comedy. Her parodies of entitled hollywood stars are the best I have ever read.

Score: 0

I was reading a FB comment thread, and suddenly someone said "I DEMAND TO READ THE ANCIENT GREEK COMEDY 'THE FROGS.'" I was like, well, that Aeschylated quickly.

Score: 1

If Louis CK cant go back to comedy he could always pick up fishing. Rumor has it he's a master baiter.

Score: 1

People say comedy comes from a sad place... Just got back from Puerto Rico and I'm still unfunny.

Score: 2

What do you call a Romanic comedy duo of a man and a goat who specializes in mocking the constructs of society? Satyre.

Score: 2

There's a new The President show on Comedy Central starting the 27th about Donald Trump We can just watch Fox News until then.

Score: 2

Im living a romantic comedy Everyone is finding true love while my love life itself is a joke

Score: 2

I know all the great comedy tricks... like Irony and the Rule of Two

Score: 1

A murderer tried stand up comedy and he killed it.

Score: 2

Halloween is a great time for comedy Because skeleton jokes are always humerus

Score: 1

There is a line in comedy that you should not cross and that line starts at the Boston Marathon.

Score: 1

Why can't steven hawking perform comedy? He can't do stand up

Score: 1

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