Contents
Contents
Courtesy of my 6yo daughter: What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor
A joke my 8-year old made up: What do you call a chicken that's afraid of the dark? A chicken.
What do you call children born in whorehouses?
Brothel sprouts
Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger!
What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Yo momma.
What do you call 100 rabbits walking backwards? A receding hare line.
What do you call a boat full of polite football players?
A good sportsman ship
I'm sorry
What do you call a Mexican bodybuilder who runs out of protein? No Whey José.
What do you call a redditor with an opinion? Names
What do you call a priest that’s also a lawyer? A father in law
What do you call a Bee hive with no exits? Unbelievable.
What do you call an evil Muslim? Muhahahahahahammed
What do you call 6.02*10^23 butts? Molasses
What do you call a 60-year old whose puberty just started? A late boomer
What do you call the cleavage between breast implants? Silicon Valley
What do you call a french man wearing sandals? Phillipe Phillop
What do you call a soldier that's survived mustard gas and pepper spray? A seasoned veteran
What do you call a dwarf in a tumble dryer? A midget spinner.
What do you call a black man that's just been hit by a bus? An ambulance you racist.
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is all the time? A widow.
What do you call a snake that's exactly 3.14 meters long? A πthon
What do you call a tire made out of 365 recycled condoms? A Goodyear
What do you call a Communist sniper? A Marxman.
What do you call friends that you go out to eat with? Taste buds.
What do you call a 3.14m long snake? A πthon.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? A waist of time.
What do you call cows that have a sense of humor? Laughing stock.
What do you call children who are born into a Whorehouse? Brothel Sprouts.
What do you call a stolen Tesla? An Edison.
What do you call a company that replants fields of grass using cropduster airplanes?
A re-seeding airline!
​
This joke sucks but it's my cakeday and I was told there would be plentiful imaginary internet points .... XD
What do you call a Mexican bodybuilder who's run out of protein powder? No whey José
What do you call a cow that has abortion? Decaffeinated
What do you call someone in the White House who is honest, ethical, intellectual, law abiding, and truthful? A tourist
If someone who speaks 3 languages is trilingual, and someone who speaks 2 is bilingual, what do you call someone who speaks only 1? American.
What do you call a communist who's good with a rifle? A marxman.
What do you call a virus that affects your command-line? A Terminal Illness.
What do you call and epileptic in a lettuce field? A seizure salad
If someone who speaks two languages is bilingual, and someone who speaks many languages is multilingual, then what do you call someone who speaks one language? **An American.**
A blonde dies her hair brown... what do you call it? Artificial intelligence
What do you call it when a chameleon won’t change colors? A reptile dysfunction.
What do you call a trio of disabled people? Cripple threat...
What do you call Batman the morning after a big fight? Bruised Wayne
What do you call a low budget circumcision? A rip-off
What do you call a blind girl with a vacuum? A Roomba
What do you call a snake that builds houses?
A boa constructer
Don’t bully me I know it’s bad
What do you call a white kid who’s also a furry? An animal cracker
What do you call a waffle on the beach in Southern California? A sandy Eggo!
What do you call a helpful hoe? Thotful
What do you call a fat person with a crystal ball? Four-chin teller
What do you call a tree living in Russia? Dimitree
What do you call it when an immigrant walks into a Catholic Church? Alien vs Predator (this is my son’s joke)
What do you call an apathetic socialist state? The "So be it" Union.
What do you call a cowboy comedian? A punslinger.
What do you call it when you put a baby in a freezer? **Chilled abuse**
What do you call it when a blonde dyes their hair brown... Artifical intelligence.
What do you call a paraplegic who does karate? Partial Arts.
What do you call an educated woman in a third world country? Intellectual property
What do you call the world's most expensive haircut? Chemotherapy
What do you call an Iraqi father carrying all the groceries? Baghdad.
What do you call a kid with no legs and one eye? Names.
What do you call a book that wants to be a play? A transcript.
What do you call a gaming console that used to be yours? An ex box
What do you call Matt Damon when he haunts a carpet store? Mat Demon
What do you call a Siamese spy? A double agent.
what do you call Johnny Cash's millennial grandson Johnny Bitcoin
What do you call a waffle that you dropped on the beach? San Diego
What do you call an insect that used to drive people around for money? Exuberant
What do you call someone who has never seen the Matrix? A Neo not-see.
What do you call a 27 year old woman in Mississippi? Grandma
What do you call a 50 year old that sleeps with 9 year olds? A prophet.
What do you call a ward full of coma patients A vegetable garden.
What do you call a psychic midget that escapes from prison? A small medium at large.
What do you call a war between india and the UK? The empire strikes back.
What do you call a kid with one eye and a pirate's leg? Names
What do you call an Illegal immigrant fistfighting a child molester? Alien vs. Predator.
What do you call a fat Irish werewolf? O'beast
What do you call the cross between an elephant and a rhino? 'Ell if I know.
What do you call a nun that is going for a walk? A roamin catholic
What do you call a retarded kid with no arms and one leg. Names.
What do you call 2 homeless people hitting each other with cardboard ? Pillow fight
What do you call a monkey terrorist? A Baboom!
What do you call a Filipino yoga instructor? A Manila Folder.
What do you call an English teacher who used to have anxiety? Past tense.
What do you call a boxing match between a Mexican and a priest? Alien vs. Predator
What do you call a fraud in a Candle factory? A Scandle.
What do you call the birth of a retarded child? A special delivery.
What do you call the fear of chainsaws?
Common Sense.
I'll show myself out...
What do you call someone who has 6.02 * 10^23 dollars? A mole-ionaire.
What do you call the amount of time it takes to win an argument with a lawyer? An attornity.
What do you call it when a lizard has problems in the bedroom? A reptile dysfunction
What do you call a mathematician at the beach? A tan gent.
What do you call a blonde that dyes her hair brown? Artificial intelligence.
What do you call a blonde who colors her hair another color? Artificial Intelligence
What do you call a food that turns black people on? An *afro*-disiac.
What do you call a fruit that makes fun of someone?
A banana-nana-nana
Got it on a popsicle stick. Laughed for way too long.
What do you call a Mexican guy with one rubber toe? Roberto
What do you call a laser-equipped skunk? Pepé Le Pew Pew Pew!
What do you call a cowardly, depressed communist that recycles? A green yellow red with the blues.
What do you call 20 dead babies in a maternity ward? Spawn camping.
What do you call a medical student who graduates last in his class? Doctor