How do you know when a bass player and drummer are at your front door? The knocking is out of time and they don't know when to come in.
What do you call a bass player without a GF? Homeless.
why is the bass player stuck outside? he doesn't know when to come in and can't find the right key anyway
What's the difference between a bass player and a large pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.
Why was the bass player arrested? He was caught fingering A minor.
What do you do when a bass player shows up at your front door? Pay him for the pizza.
What do you call a bass player who can get by without a girlfriend? A Master-Bassist
How do you get a bass player off your porch? Pay for the pizza
What do you call the crazy people who always hang out with musicians? Bass players
Women don't like bass players, apparently... Whenever I say I like thick G-strings they allways walk away, I don't know why.
How does a bass player pick up girls? He says "Hi I'm a guitarist"
How do you know when a bass player and drummer are at your door? The knocking is off rhythm and they don’t know when to come in.
Why can't you hear the bass on Metallica's And Justice For All album? Because they threw the bass player under the bus.
Cop pulled me over
I was pulled over by a cop, for a random breath test
The cop shoved the machine in my face and asked me to count to 5
I counted 1.....2.....3.....4 and looked at him.
He looked back confused, Then I said “I’m a bass player.... I can’t count past 4
What's the three toughest years of a bass player? Second grade.
What is the bass players preferred method of contraception? His personality.
Why did the bass player miss his second lesson? He had a gig that night.
Why couldn't the drummer make it to the show? He locked the bass player in the car.
Why was the bass player the most popular person in the band? He was a need to know bassist.
How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, he'll mess it up and the guitarist will have to do it.
What do you throw a drowning bass player? His amp
Three European contrabass players were denied access to USA at a New York airport... ...they couldn't let contraband trough customs.
Q: How do you know when a Bass player is successful? A: His girlfriend has a job.
Bass guitar is so easy to learn...
...Even bass* players can do it.
*For bass players the joke is you’re dumb.
How does a bass player turn off the lights before bed? He closes the car door.
How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb? None. The keyboard player can do it with his left hand.
What do you throw at a drowning bass player ? His amp.
A British bass player walks into a bar.
Bartender says "You've got a steering wheel in your pants."
Bass player says "I know. It's driving me nuts."
What's the difference between a pizza and a bass player? Pizza can feed family of four.
Q: How do you make a bass player mad? A: Loosen one of his four bass strings.
Q: How do you throw a bass player into a complete rage?
A: Don't tell him which one you loosened.