Irish Jokes


Funniest Irish Jokes

It's my cake day today, so I'll give you one of my favourite jokes. What do you call an Irish man bouncing off the walls?

Rick O Shea

Score: 4111
Funny Irish Jokes
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A boy was born of an Indian, Chinese, Irish, and Italian grandmother... They couldn't settle on a name, until it hit them!

They named him Ravi O. Lee


Score: 2538

Why are Irish bankers so successful? Because their capital's always Dublin.

Score: 1656

Why are the Irish so rich? Their capital is always Dublin. Hehe

Score: 1053

Why are there no Irish lawyers? They can't pass the bar.

Score: 937

How many shots can an Irish man handle? about 10 rounds.

Edit: (Mayweather vs McGregor)

Score: 918

I can make you speak Irish Say "Whale oil beef hooked" quickly

Score: 645

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? There's one less drunk at the funeral.

Score: 573

What is the difference between an irish wedding and an irish funeral? One fewer drunk person.

Edit: Fewer, not less

Score: 403

Why do the Irish only put 239 beans in their soup? Because one more and they would get too farty

Score: 346

What’s the difference between an irish wedding and an irish funeral? There‘s one less drunk.

Score: 323

An Irish guy walks out of a bar... I mean, it could happen.

Score: 309

What do you call three Irish lumberjacks? Tree fellers
Edit: Wooo gold!

Score: 279

The Irish must have lost so much money last night due to betting. They'll be asking to rejoin the United Kingdom later today.

Score: 263

What's more Irish than eating potatoes? Not eating potatoes.

Score: 251

What's more Irish than potatoes? No potatoes.

Score: 240

Two Irish men walk out of a bar Yes, it happens

Score: 240

What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? One less drinker

Score: 234

At an Irish wedding reception someone yelled: "Would all the married men please stand next to the one person who has made your life worth living"

The bartender was nearly crushed to death.

Score: 228

What's the difference between Saint Patrick's Day and Martin Luther King Day? Everyone wants to be Irish on Saint Patrick's Day.

Score: 222

Why does Irish chili only have 239 beans? Because anymore and it'd be too farty.

Score: 219

Why are there no Irish lawyers? You ever seen an Irishman pass a bar?

Score: 213

What´s the difference between an irish funeral and an irish wedding? At the funeral one person isnt drinking

Score: 194

I had a 7 course Irish dinner last night A 6 pack of Guinness and a potato

Score: 172

Did you know that Irish only put 239 beans in their chili?? If they added just one more, it would be too-farty!

Score: 164

Why are there only 239 beans in Irish stew? Because one more, and it'd be too farty.

Score: 149

What's Irish and stays out on your deck? Paddy O'furniture

Score: 141

What's the difference between an Irish funeral and an Irish wedding? One less drunk...

Score: 139

What do you call an Irish woman with one leg shorter than the other? Ilene.

What do you call a Japanese woman with the same affliction?


Score: 139

An Irish Mexican teenager starts a job as a builder.. Only one hour into his first job he tries to hammer a nail with a screwdriver. The boss spots this and walks over to let him know he's doing it wrong. "You've got a lot to learn young Paddy Juan".

Score: 77

My DNA results came back 39% German, 27% Irish, 19% Beagle and 15% Pug. Turns out my dog licked my sample.

Score: 30

What's Irish and comes out in summer? Paddy O'Furniture

Score: 27

What do you call a fat Irish werewolf? O'beast

Score: 25

What's the difference between Martin Luther King Jr Day and St Patrick's Day? On St Patrick's Day everyone wants to be Irish.

Score: 17

What's the difference between a irish wedding and an irish funeral? One person isn't drinking.

Score: 8

What’s the difference between St. Patrick’s Day and Martin Luther King Jr. Day? On St. Patrick’s Day, everyone wishes they were Irish.

Score: 7

What happened to the Irish construction worker? He got hammered.

Score: 5

What do you call an Irish snake in Lord of the Rings? Legolas

Score: 4

Why are Irish businesspeople so successful? Because their capital is doublin’.

Score: 4

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New Irish Jokes

What do the Irish call the only crocodile at the Dublin Zoo? Croc o’ d’ Isle

Score: 1

What do you call the Irish presidents plane Èire force one

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What do the Irish have instead of Netflix & Chill? Meet & Potatoes

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What liquer do most asian people like to hate? Baileys Irish ... Cream

Score: 0

What do you get when you cross Obama, Bruce Lee, and the Irish? Barack O’Lee

Score: 0

What did the Irish fraudsters call their band? Shamrock.

Score: 3

A Scottish man, an Irish man, and a English man are all in a hot air balloon. Somehow

Score: 3

A Scottish man, an English man and an Irish man tell some jokes in a pub... Everyone gets arrested for racism.

Score: 3

What's the Name of the new irish NBA Rookie ? LePrechaun.

Score: 1

An St Patties day Jon What’s the difference between st Patrick’s day, and MLK jr day????

On st Patrick’s day, everyone wishes they were Irish ☘️

Score: 0

A 14 year old Irish boy asked his grandfather for $10 Grandfather: “What do you need it for?”

Boy: “I want to get a guinea pig”

Grandfather: “Here’s 20$, go get yourself a nice Irish girl”

Score: 1

An Irish man, a woman, and PETA walk into a bar. Whoops, sorry the joke already got stolen and euthanized by PETA.

Score: 3

6 Irish set menu 5 glasses of beer and one bread .

Score: 1

What do you call a meeting of short sickly Irish men Leper Con

Score: 2

Since I was a kid I always wanted to find the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. But I guess that is just something Irish for.

EDIT: I just thought of this randomly. I'm sorry this is a horrible joke.

Score: 3

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