What did the scientist say when he found two isotopes of helium?
Im making bad chemistry jokes coz all the good ones argon
How do you tell the difference between a chemistry professor and a politician ? Just ask them to read this word: unionized.
Don't drink water while studying...
Because chemistry says that concentration decreases while adding water.
Note: My first attempt. Thanks.
I wanted to build my career on making chemistry jokes to cure my depression. Then I realized alcohol is a solution.
My chemistry teacher asked me what's an acid + base. A good party wasn't the correct answer, apparently.
That awkward moment when you tell a chemistry joke, and get no reaction. I guess all the good chemistry puns argon.
Are you made from Na, selenium and xenon?
Because you are sodium SeXe.
Edit: I have yet to zinc of another chemistry joke.
My friends told me to stop making chemistry jokes, but then I told just one more I got no reaction, and now all my friends Argon
For our chemistry exam we had to write a thousand words on acid. Unfortunately my pen turned into a gorilla and the floor melted.
Chemistry teacher: Did you know protons have mass? Student: I didn't even know protons were Catholic.
How often do I make chemistry jokes? Periodically. I made one yesterday, but it had no reaction.
In a chemistry class, the teacher asks a girl
- Mary, what is H2SO4?
- Oh god, this is so easy, why can't I remember, it's on the tip of my tongue.
Quickly, Johnny says:
- Then spit it out, that's sulfuric acid!
My chemistry teacher is a damn liar! He said that alcohol is a solvent. I've been drinking for years and it hasn't solved any of my problems.
Me :Is it a crime to throw Sodium Chloride at a woman?
Judge: Yes, that's assault
Me: I know it's a salt but is it a crime?
My chemistry teacher asked me if I knew anything about sodium hypobromite. I replied, "NaBrO"
The school counsellor told me that alcohol was never a solution. I said that my chemistry teacher would disagree.
I know its old but I have not seen it on here
So, wanna hear a Chemistry Joke? Nevermind, all the good ones Argon
A Hydrogen atom sits crying in the corner...
I approached and asked if he was okay. He said "No, I lost my electron"
I said "Are you sure?"
He said "Yes, I'm positive"
(This joke once scored me a week's extension on some chemistry coursework I hadn't been doing)
What did x æ a-12 got when he was given a lithium iron battery, to reboot himself?
Edit: chemistry joke
I came across this equation on my chemistry test - C2H6O... Looks like I'm dealing with an alcohol problem.
The relationship between the Physics teacher and biology teacher in my brother's school didn't last long... They had no chemistry et. al.
Walks into a bar chemistry jokes
Silver walks into a bar
He sees gold in the distance and yell’s,
“AU! Get outa here!”
Helium walks into a bar
The bartender says,
“Sorry we don’t serve noble gases here”
Helium doesn’t react
My middle school chemistry teacher once told us... "Alcohol is not a solution, it's a distillation" \*smirks\*
When you wipe a spill, you are only are spreading out the liquid to promote evaporation through the mitochondria I learned chemistry yesterday
Chemistry jokes #3
H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
I’m trying to find the best chemistry jokes but all the good ones argon
Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
Chemistry joke #2
Two atoms were walking down the street together.
Atom 1: Oh no! I think I lost an electron.
Atom 2: Are you sure?
Atom 1: Yes, I’m positive.
Where Guacamole's grow
Geeky Chemistry Humor for Foodies:
If Avogadro’s Number is 6.022 x 10^23 (which equals one Mole) then 6.022 x 10^23 Avocados equals one Guaca-Mole.
What did the chemistry teacher say to his friend when they found a mineshaft?
(if you don’t get it look at the periodic table)
I told someone a chemistry joke earlier today. I can't remember what it was, but I got the reaction I was looking for.
New Years Parties at my place are like being in a chemistry lab Some people drop the base, some drop acid while others do ether one.
I was going to make a chemistry joke, but since I'm old to this sub...
... I don't have any Neons...
... and all the good ones Argon!