Just asked Siri.
"Surely it's not going to rain today?"
She said "it will, and don't call me Shirley"
...Forgot to take my phone off Airplane mode.
The sky above looked ominous, so I asked Siri, "Surely, it's not going to rain again today?!"
It replied, "It is and don't call me Shirley!"
Guess I forgot to take my phone off Airplane mode…
Just asked Siri. "Surely it's not going to rain today?"
She said, "it is, and dont call me Shirley".
Forgot to take my phone off Airplane mode.
Two blondes are locked out of their car... The first blonde is trying to unlock the car using a coat hanger. The second says to the first "hurry up! It looks like it's going to rain and the top's down!"
I think my wife is starting to get depressed with all this rain we’re getting. Everyday, I see her at the window with a sad look on her face. If it gets any worse I might have to let her back inside.
One afternoon, A Viking called Rudolph was looking out his window when he suddenly said , “ It’s going to rain in seven minutes.” His wife asked, “How do you know?” His response:” Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”
I just asked Siri "Surely it's not going to rain today?". Siri replied "It is, and don't call me Shirley." I forgot to take my phone off airplane mode
Why don't Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore? April showers bring Mayflowers.
My water stopped working for a bit today.
My wife immediately said, "I'm going outside to dig a hole to catch the rain water!"
After the wife is gone I said to the rest of the family, "she means well"
Two blondes are trying to unlock their car with a coat hanger. One says, "Hurry up! It's starting to rain and the top's down!"
When i was 5 i thought the rain was god peeing How silly childish ideas can be...thinking god exists
What does your mom and a rain forest have in common? If you look deep enough in the bush, you might find a cockatoo.
My half Native American friend Les tried to teach me to rain dance, but we could only ever muster a light mist... I guess I'm just going to have to make dew with Les.
Always leave the top down in a convertible, even in the rain Worst case scenario, you get to use the car pool lane.
"Dad, why did you name me Rain?"
Dad: "Because rain was the first thing that fell on you"
Rain: "Oh, I never knew that. Is that why my sister is named Snow as well?"
Dad: "Yes, you are absolutely right"
*a baby cries in the corner*
Dad: Shut up Brick!
Don't ask me!
A tourist visiting Seattle is sick of rain and asks a boy - Does it ever stop raining here?
Boy - How do I know? I am only eight.
(works best when looks like it's gonna rain) "I hope the rain keeps up..."
...so it don't come down!"
my great grandfather used to say that all the time. Not sure if anyone here would care but its almost funny
Why do Italians throw pizza onto the field after they win a match? Because they rain supreme.
I love the look on people's faces, standing soaked in the rain at the bus stop as I drive past. It's partly why I became a bus driver.
*My iPhone on Airplane mode*
Me: Siri, surely it must rain today
Siri: It won't and don't call me Shirley
When I'm on a golf course and it starts to rain and lightning, I hold up my one-iron Because even God can't hit a one-iron
On a rainy day every one was enjoying the rain but only PETA wasn't Because it was pouring cats & dogs
Why does Alfred the Impolite Communist always stay inside when it rains? Because Rude Alf the Red knows rain dear.
Why don't Native Americans do rain dances in April? Because April showers bring May flowers and May flowers bring white men.
Why did primitive cultures have rain dance ceremonies? They always increased the chants of rain.
Did you hear about the guy who was shocked to death while standing at the mic when it started to rain at the classical music concert? He was the conductor
What should you ask the guy who started acting stupid, got kicked out of the club, and is now stood in the rain outside with no mates? You k?
I tried to call my Republican Senators today... I ended up with rain check because they all sold out
Me and the rain are waiting... I'm waiting for rain to come so that I can wash my car. On the other hand the rain is waiting for me to wash my car.
I met a person who said they would set the world on fire...
I don't think the Amazon Rain Forest was a good place to start
Kevin, having locked his keys in the car, calls a locksmith. Kevin says to the locksmith, "Can you make it quick? It's about to rain and I left my windows open."
The phrase “raining cats and dogs” has been taken out of common usage in California
The phrase was deemed to be offensive, giving a platform to those who throw animals out of windows.
It was also noted. There is no rain in California.
Do you think the expression "take a rain check" is especially apt among people who participate in golden showers? "I can't pee on you today, let's take a rain check."
Having spent 3 weeks in the rain forest with no access to technology... Upon her return, Jenny didn't know she'd been Borneo
I forgot it there was a tropical dress code, today at work. I showed up in a heavy raincoat.
My boss (who was angry with me): What the heck Johnson! Didn't you get my email on the dress code?
Me: I take it you've never been to a tropical rain forest.
Why is a spring rain like your ex-boyfriend??
Why is a spring rain like your ex-boyfriend??
It doesn’t last long and barely gets you wet!
Did you hear about the storm of the century in Columbus? Neither did I because, It was just rain and the lightning never showed up.
How could a man go outside in the pouring rain without protection, and not have a hair on his head get wet? he was bald
Why are the people who flew from Spain always dry, even if it was raining there? Because the rain in Spain stays mainly in the plane.
God said let it rain for forty days and forty nights and Noah said... That’ll be good for the plants.
The other day my friend said that, "its harsh to have Uber drivers drive in heavy rain for you"... I said, "He's doing it on his own Accord."
I was on my way to work when I saw a dwarf standing at a bus stop in the rain
“Do you wanna hop in mate?” I asked.
“Piss off” he replied.
“Suit yourself” I said, as I zipped up my backpack.
My notebook got wet in the rain and I lost most of my school assignments. On a side note, I still managed to save a few of them.