Star Trek Jokes

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Funniest Star Trek Jokes

Boy: Dad how come there are no Jews, Christians or Muslims in Star Trek? Dad: Cause it's the future son

Score: 113
Funny Star Trek Jokes
Score: 92

I accidentally went to Star Trek convention dressed as Chewbacca... It was a Wookie mistake

Score: 89

Where do Star Trek fans work out? At the He's Dead Gym.

Score: 25

What do toilet paper and The Star Trek Enterprise have in common? They both circle Uranus in search of Klingons.

Score: 21

For Star Wars and Star Trek fans A stormtrooper and a red shirt are in a room.

The stormtrooper shoots the red shirt, but misses every shot.

The red shirt dies anyway.

Score: 19

I tried to sneak into a Star Trek convention disguised as a Doctor. The Security Guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.

Score: 18

Star Trek fans always expect a gift when going to a convention They call it the enter prize.

Score: 17

What does toilet paper and the Star Trek Enterprise have in common? They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons.

Score: 16

How many ears do Star Trek fans have? 3, Right Ear, Left Ear and The Final Front-Ear.

Score: 13

I'm a guy who's into Star Wars, Star Trek and Doctor Who. Can you guess what I'm not into right now? A woman.

Score: 13

I accidentally went to my first Star Trek convention dressed as Chewbacca. Wookie mistake.

Score: 11

My favorite joke of all time: What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They circle Uranus looking for Klingons.

Score: 10

Star Trek Discovery is going to have a female lead which will ruin the series. The male captains wandered around aimlessly getting into trouble.

She will just ask for directions and head straight to the destination.

Score: 9

I can't decide if I want to watch the original Star Trek of The Next Generation... I guess you could say I'm stuck between a Spock and a Picard place!

Score: 9

What did Spock find in the toilet of the USS Enterprise? **The Captain's log.**

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Bonus Trekkie Joke:
*Why is Star Trek like the toilet paper in there?*

... because it keeps searching Uranus for Klingons.

Score: 9

Star Trek characters make the worst sports fans... They always root for the away team

Score: 8

Why did the starship captain buy a sub-lightspeed propulsion system that he didn't need? It was an impulse purchase.

For anyone who isn't aware, this is a star trek fathers day joke.

Score: 7

I just spent $100 on a limited edition DVD of Star Trek 2 Turns out the seller was a Kahn man

Score: 6

What did Star Trek teach millions of kids? To boldly split infinitives!

Score: 6

I should stay up until 3 in the morning more often I want to make a show with the two actors who have played Khan in the different Star Trek films where we discuss literature. We will call it "Prose and Khans".

Score: 6

Why did the trekkie spit out her latte at the Star Trek Convention? Cause William Shatner Coffee.

hahahha

Score: 6

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both travel around Uranus looking for Klingons.

Score: 6

I tried to sneak into the Star Trek convention as a doctor... The security guard suspected I was not the real McCoy.

Score: 6

Why do Star Trek fans never grow out of it? They just Klingon to it

Score: 5

What's the connection between the Star Trek Enterprise and toilet paper? They both travel around Uranus looking for Klingons.

Score: 5

Why are there no Iraqis in Star Trek? Because it's set in the future.

Score: 5

I don't always seduce hispanic Star Trek fans... but when I do, I prefer dos Trekkies

Score: 5

Wife: do you know why our son won’t wear the red shirt I laid out for him? **Me:** nope.

[flashback to watching Star Trek]

**Me:** so the guy in the red shirt *always* dies.

Score: 4

A Star Trek forum exists where Trekkies can debate additions to the universe's lore. It's called Prose and Khans.

Score: 4

What did the Borg's existential brother say (Star Trek)? Existence is futile.

Score: 4

Teacher said this one in class....Why are there no Muslims in Star Trek? Because it's the future.

Score: 4

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both travel around Uranus searching for Klingons

Score: 3

A Star Trek fan meets William Shatner. "Wow. I can't believe I'm meeting you at Comic Corn."

"Actually, it's called Comic Con"

"Com?"

"Con."

"Cold?"

"Com!

"Cookie?"

"CONNNNNNNN!"

Score: 3

Did you hear about the Star Trek poetry night? It has it's Prose and Khan's.

Score: 3

What does the enterprise from star trek, and toilet paper have in common They both fly arround Uranus picking off clingons

Score: 3

What's a star trek fans favourite drink? Picardi and Kirk

Score: 3

This one might be a stretch Which Star Trek character do cleaners hate the most?

Mister Spock








Missed a spot... yah. :'(

Score: 3

No one in the Star Trek universe knows how to tie a neck tie. They're all use to Klingons.

Score: 3

What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both collect strange Klingons around Uranus.

Score: 3

They should make Star Trek toilet paper... ...so you can help wipe Klingons off Uranus.

(been a while since this one's been around. Just heard it again today from my 5 year old niece)

Score: 3

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New Star Trek Jokes

What have Star Trek and Jeffery Epstein got in common? Boldly going where no man has gone before.

Score: 1

Fun.Da.Mentalist. An extremist Star Wars fanatic walked into the centre of a large crowd at a Star Trek convention, shouted "Admiral Ackbar!" at the top of his voice and activated the thermal detonator that he held in his hand.

Yotto, .... Yotto.

Score: 2

I once ran into someone dressed as Brent Spiner's character from Star Trek: The Next Generation, and saved all the coordinates so that I could replicate the experience later. I metadata.

Score: 1

It always amuses me to think what must have happened in Star Trek over the next three hundred years for a Frenchman like Picard to have an English accent... And not an Arabic one.

Score: 2

Would you recommend the novelization of Star Trek II? I heard there was prose and Khans.

Score: 3

I visited a load of French towns doing impressions of Star Trek characters. Dunkirk?

Yea, did all of them.

Score: 2

Ricardo Montalban struggled to find acting roles after "Star Trek 2." Nobody wanted to hire an ex-Khan.

Score: 3

The guns in Star Trek didnt actually shoot lasers... They were faux-ton guns.

Score: 2

What's Gillian McKeith's favourite part of Star Trek Captain's Log

Score: 2

Whaddya use to decide whether to host a Star Trek poetry event? A list of prose in Khans.

Score: 3

What have Star Trek and toilet paper got in common? They both fly around uranus looking for Klingon's

Score: 2

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both boldly go where no man has gone before, searching around Uranus for Klingons.

Score: 2

I like Star Trek... ...But it has its' pros and Khans!

Score: 2

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both fly around 'uranus looking for Klingons

Score: 2

I just fired my replica Star Trek weapon at a policeman. He appeared completely unphased by it.

Score: 1

I can't wait for Tarantino's Star Trek. We finally get to see Planet What.

Score: 2

Quentin Tarantino's Star Trek will take place on Planet What.

Score: 1

I went to a Star Trek convention and suddenly found a guy in a costume holding on to my leg. He really couldn't help it though. He was a Klingon.

Score: 1

In the new Star Trek Picard series, how will Picard ask Dr Crusher to marry him? "Engage!"

Score: 2

Why is it that Star Trek fans never seem to grow out of it? They just always Klingon to it

Score: 1

Only hardcore Star Trek fans know Zefram Cochrane's real name. Zefram Katsopolis.

Score: 3

I don't get the hype about the new Star Trek Discovery Why are people so excited about a new STD series?

Score: 2

So do you know what Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? Circling Uranus looking for Klingons.

Score: 2

I had to break up with my girlfriend, she doesn't like Star Trek. I told her I need some space.

Score: 2

Why did the Star Trek: The Next Generation fans end their relationship? There was no Spock between them.

Score: 1

A terrorist blows himself up at a Star Trek convention. It's a bit awkward five minutes later when he's meeting his 72 virgins.

Score: 1

Peter Dinklage to play a Borg in new Star Trek film His designation : One of seven.

Score: 2

Which Star Trek character is also a magician? Jean-Luc Pickacard

Score: 2

Why are there no Mexicans in Star Trek? Because they don't work in the future too.

Score: 1

Here's two Star Trek Jokes Why did Spock look in the toilet?

He's trying to find the captain's log.

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Did you here about the new Star Trek toilet paper?

It flies around Uranus looking for Klingons

Score: 2

You know why there are no Muslims in Star Trek? Because it's set in the future.

Score: 2

Why are there no Mexicans in Star Trek? They don't work in the future either.

Score: 2

What's the most interesting beer served at the star trek swingers convention? Dos trekkies.

Score: 2

Why is it hard to break up with a Star Trek fan? Because they are such Kling-ons.

Score: 3

A horse hiking in deep space. Star Trek: Deep Space Neigh.

Score: 1

Star trek predicting future technology? How do we know apple won't be around long?
Because Captain Picard uses an android.

Score: 1

What happens in a battle between storm troopers and red shirts? (Star Trek) The storm troopers all miss, and the red shirts all die

Score: 1

To you Star Trek fans: what does the Star Ship Enterprise and toilet paper have in common? They both search around Uranus for Klingons

Score: 2

I'm opening up a pirate-themed restaurant. It'll serve breakfast food and beer, and it will be run by the guy who plays Scotty in the new Star Trek movies.

It's called Simon Pegg's Eggs, Kegs & Peg Legs.

Score: 2

Why do Trekkies never grow out of Star Trek? They always somehow just Klingon to it.

Score: 3

What was the working title for Star Trek III: The Search for Spock? Finding Nimoy

Score: 3

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