Hipster Jokes

Contents

Funniest Hipster Jokes

Funny Hipster Jokes
Score: 1726

How do You Drown a Hipster? Throw him into the mainstream.

Score: 1544

Why did the hipster fall into the lake? He went ice skating before it was cool.

Score: 1332

Why did the hipster drown? He went ice Skating before it was cool

Score: 1198

What's the worst thing to say to a hipster? You remind me of someone

Score: 1189

Why did the hipster drown? Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ‎( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Score: 419

How did the hipster drown? He went ice skating before it was cool.

Score: 383

Why did the hipster burn his mouth while drinking coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool

Score: 314

How did the Hawaiian hipster die? He walked on lava before it was cool.

Score: 310

I saw a hipster walking outside in the cold. He didn't have a jacket on, so I asked him why.

He said he was outside before it was cool.

Score: 278

How do you drown a hipster? Throw them into the mainstream.

Score: 265

How did the hipster burn his fingertips? He was changing the lightbulb before it was cool.


[rimshot]

Score: 255

Why did the hipster drown, when he was iceskating? He was skating before it was cool

Score: 175

How do you get a hipster to take a shower? Give them a leaky showerhead.


You know, so they can avoid the main stream.

Score: 144

Where did the hipster drown? In the mainstream

Score: 136

How did the hipster drown? He ice-skated before it was cool.

Score: 117

What did the hipster say about the Chilean miners? I liked them so much better when they were underground.

Score: 87

Why did the hipster get burned when he drank his coffee? The barista make a joke about sleeping with his mother.

Score: 79

What's the difference between a hipster and a homeless man? An Instagram account.

Score: 78

Why did the hipster's mouth hurt? Because he ate pizza before it was cool.

Score: 78

What's a hipster's favorite kind of cigarette? Yours.

Score: 72

Why did the hipster refuse to undergo surgery? The anesthesia wasn't local.

Score: 64

If a hipster falls on the forest, does it make a sound? Yes...but you've probably never heard it before.

Score: 61

what's the best place to drown a hipster? in the main stream

Score: 59

How do you drown a hipster? Throw them in the mainstream

Score: 54

How do you kill a hipster? You drown them in the mainstream.

Score: 50

What's the difference between a hipster and a lumberjack? The lumberjack has a job.

Score: 47

Why did the hipster burn his lip when sipping coffee? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 46

Why did the creepy hipster get arrested? because he was following people before instagram

Score: 45

How heavy is a hipster? One thousand instagrams

Score: 45

The Most Hipster Job Of All Time Is... Being a Mortician. Morticians are so hipster that their work doesn't get more popular; instead it just goes further underground.

Score: 39

What do hipster jokes and hipsters have in common? None of them are original.

Score: 30

My friend told me he thought I was a hipster. I told him I thought I was a hipster way before he did.

Score: 29

Why didn't the hipster want to see the Saint John River and the Penobscot River? They're two Maine streams.

Score: 26

Why does the hipster make crappy coffee? The beans are always under-ground.

Score: 22

Why did the hipster burn his lip on his coffee? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 17

One atom asks a hipster atom, "Hey, did you lose an electron?" The hipster atom replies, "No, I'm just being ionic."

Score: 14

How did the hipster burn his mouth from hot chocolate? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 8

So I went to my Hipster drug dealer last night... He gave me an instagram

Score: 8

Why did the Hawaiian Hipster burn to death? He walked on lava before it was cool.

Score: 6

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New Hipster Jokes

What do you call a scandinavian hipster? A Norvegan

Score: 0

Why did the hipster burn his throat while drinking coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool.

Score: 0

Iron Man and Dora the Explorer settles their tab at the hipster bar. Tips FeDora.

Score: 0

What's the difference between a hipster and a muslim woman? Muslim woman can get stoned twice after smoking one bud.

Score: 1

My hipster server didn't bother telling me the specials. They didn't think I'd get it anyway.

Score: 1

Did you hear about the hipster who burnt her tongue? She drank her coffee before it was cool.

Score: 1

How does a German hipster say hello? Gluten tag!

Score: 3

Why did the hipster sweat so much? He turned on the heating before it was cool.

Score: 3

What did the waitress do with the Coke before it was cool? Serve it to a hipster.

Score: 2

What does a waitress do when she finds a cold pizza that was forgotten to be served? Serve it to a hipster.

Score: 1

You ever hear about the hipster cowboy? He went to pay respects to the people buried at Boot Hill.

. . .you've probably never heard of them, because they're so underground.

Score: 1

How do you get a hipster to stop smoking? Tell them that cigarettes aren't gluten free.

Score: 1

Did hear about the hipster that became a rocket scientist? He only wanted to work on retrorockets.

Score: 1

What is a hipster russian roulette? You got six cookies and five of them is gluten free.

Score: 2

Why did Tweety Bird suspect his waitress was a hipster? He tawt he taw a titty tatt!

Score: 1

A hipster atom says "I think I lost an electron!" Another atom asks "Are you sure?" to which the hipster atom replies "NO I was just being ionic."

Score: 1

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