Hipster Jokes

Contents

Funniest Hipster Jokes

Funny Hipster Jokes
Score: 1726

How do You Drown a Hipster? Throw him into the mainstream.

Score: 1544

Why did the hipster fall into the lake? He went ice skating before it was cool.

Score: 1332

Why did the hipster drown? He went ice Skating before it was cool

Score: 1198

What's the worst thing to say to a hipster? You remind me of someone

Score: 1189

Why did the hipster drown? Because he went ice-skating before it was cool ‎( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Score: 419

How did the hipster drown? He went ice skating before it was cool.

Score: 383

Why did the hipster burn his mouth while drinking coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool

Score: 314

How did the Hawaiian hipster die? He walked on lava before it was cool.

Score: 310

I saw a hipster walking outside in the cold. He didn't have a jacket on, so I asked him why.

He said he was outside before it was cool.

Score: 278

How do you drown a hipster? Throw them into the mainstream.

Score: 265

How did the hipster burn his fingertips? He was changing the lightbulb before it was cool.


[rimshot]

Score: 255

Why did the hipster drown, when he was iceskating? He was skating before it was cool

Score: 175

How do you get a hipster to take a shower? Give them a leaky showerhead.


You know, so they can avoid the main stream.

Score: 144

Where did the hipster drown? In the mainstream

Score: 136

How did the hipster drown? He ice-skated before it was cool.

Score: 117

What did the hipster say about the Chilean miners? I liked them so much better when they were underground.

Score: 87

Why did the hipster get burned when he drank his coffee? The barista make a joke about sleeping with his mother.

Score: 79

Why did the hipster's mouth hurt? Because he ate pizza before it was cool.

Score: 78

What's the difference between a hipster and a homeless man? An Instagram account.

Score: 78

What's a hipster's favorite kind of cigarette? Yours.

Score: 72

Why did the hipster refuse to undergo surgery? The anesthesia wasn't local.

Score: 64

If a hipster falls on the forest, does it make a sound? Yes...but you've probably never heard it before.

Score: 61

what's the best place to drown a hipster? in the main stream

Score: 59

How do you drown a hipster? Throw them in the mainstream

Score: 54

How do you kill a hipster? You drown them in the mainstream.

Score: 50

What's the difference between a hipster and a lumberjack? The lumberjack has a job.

Score: 47

Why did the hipster burn his lip when sipping coffee? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 46

Why did the creepy hipster get arrested? because he was following people before instagram

Score: 45

How heavy is a hipster? One thousand instagrams

Score: 45

The Most Hipster Job Of All Time Is... Being a Mortician. Morticians are so hipster that their work doesn't get more popular; instead it just goes further underground.

Score: 39

I shot a hipster in his leg now he's a hopster.

Score: 31

Why did the hipster die in Pripyat? He went into reactor 4 before it was cool

Score: 30

How much does a Hipster weight ? 2 Instagram

Score: 23

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he ate his food before it was cool.

Score: 20

Why did the coffee burn the hipster? Because he drank it before it was cool.

Score: 18

How do you drown a hipster? Throw him in the main stream.

Score: 18

Why did the hipster burn his lip on his coffee? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 17

Where does one drown a hipster? In the mainstream.

Score: 16

I have a joke about a hipster ...you've probably never heard it.

Q: How much mass is in a single hipster?



A: An Instagram

Score: 7

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New Hipster Jokes

Why did the hipster burn his lips at Starbucks coffee? He wanted to drink it before it gets cool.

Score: 1

Why did the hipster burn his throat while drinking coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool.

Score: 0

What's the difference between a hipster and a muslim woman? Muslim woman can get stoned twice after smoking one bud.

Score: 1

I asked a millennial hipster yoga teacher to leave the room... He said: "Nah a ma stay."

Score: 5

Did you hear about the hipster who burnt her tongue? She drank her coffee before it was cool.

Score: 1

Why did the hipster sweat so much? He turned on the heating before it was cool.

Score: 3

What does a waitress do when she finds a cold pizza that was forgotten to be served? Serve it to a hipster.

Score: 1

You ever hear about the hipster cowboy? He went to pay respects to the people buried at Boot Hill.

. . .you've probably never heard of them, because they're so underground.

Score: 1

How did the wanna-be-hipster die? Trying to cross the mainstream!

Score: 1

How did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the pizza before it was cool.

Score: 2

Did you hear about the hipster who was found frozen in a block of ice on Lake Michigan? He was into water before it was cool.

Score: 1

What's the best way to kill a hipster? You drown him in the mainstream.

Score: 3

How much does a hipster weight? An Insta-gram.

Score: 1

How do you drown a hipster? Put him in the mainstream!

Score: 3

I saw a guy with horribly burned lips and chin gingerly sipping his tea He was a hipster. He said he enjoyed his tea before it was cool.

Score: 2

How did the hipster die? He went ice skating before it was cool

Score: 7

what does the one-upping hipster say? hold my avocado

Score: 2

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he sipped his coffee before it was cool

Score: 2

What is the best way to kill a hipster? Drown him in the mainstream.

Score: 7

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it... Would a hipster buy the sound track

Score: 1

What does a hipster Jew do in his free time? He brews.

Score: 4

Why would a Hipster hate a Nuclear War? Because when the bombs detonate, dying would become too mainstream.

Score: 1

Why is the triangle the most hipster shape? It's the edgiest you can get without becoming a square

Score: 1

Why did the hipster drown? Because he went ice skating before it was cool.

Score: 6

What do you call a disabled hipster? A cripster.

Score: 7

Why did the hipster burn his mouth in the coffee? He took a sip before it was cool

Score: 1

Why did the hipster burn its tongue? He drank the coffee before it was cool.

Score: 2

How do you kill a hipster? Tell him that breathing is too mainstream.

Score: 2

I'm not a hipster... I've been dressing like this since the 1920s.

Score: 2

Hipster always burn their mouth by eating things before they are cool

Score: 2

Why did the coffee burn the hipster? Because it was hot.

Score: 5

When did the hipster join klux klan? Before it was ku.

Score: 4

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He ate his pizza before it was cool

Score: 5

Dad joke for Australians Did you hear about the hipster swagman?

He was hanging out under the shade of abah tree before it was cool.

Score: 2

How do you get a hipster to stop smoking? Tell them that cigarettes aren't gluten free.

Score: 1

I'm going to tell you a hipster joke... Never mind

You wouldn't get it anyway

Score: 4

Why did the hipster burn her tongue? Because she drank her coffee before it was cool!

Score: 1

Why did the hipster burn his mouth on his coffee? Because he drank it way before it was cool

Score: 3

Did hear about the hipster that became a rocket scientist? He only wanted to work on retrorockets.

Score: 1

Why did the hipster love water? Because he only liked ice it before it was cool.

Score: 3

I'm an anti-hipster. I only do things AFTER they're cool.

Score: 2

Why did the hipster burn his tongue on his coffee He drank it before it was cool

Score: 3

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He drank coffee before it was cool

Score: 1

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He drank the coffee before it was cool 😎

Score: 7

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank coffee before it was cool

Score: 3

How do you cut down a hipster tree? A suuh dude!

Score: 7

Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He took a sip of his coffee before it was cool.

Score: 4

A hipster atom says "I think I lost an electron!" Another atom asks "Are you sure?" to which the hipster atom replies "NO I was just being ionic."

Score: 1

Why'd the hipster burn his tongue while drinking his coffee? He drank it before it was cool.

Score: 6

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