I went to an Art Gallery, it was $60 to enter and $80 to look at each picture. It was called Electronic Arts.
A person with an art degree walks into a bar. They then head behind the counter and start serving drinks.
It annoys me that Engineering students call themselves engineers.. You don’t hear medical students calling themselves doctors, or art students calling themselves unemployed.
I heard Starbucks is trying to hire a lot more refugees Those poor art majors are going to suffer, then
What's the difference between an art major and a philosophy major? The philosophy major will ask you WHY you want fries with that.
Give an Eevee a Water Stone and it turns into Vaporeon. Give an Eevee a Fire Stone and it turns into Flareon. Give an Eevee a couple dollars every month for their art project and it turns into Patreon.
Minecraft is probably what hitler would have titled his autobiography if he had gotten into art school
I was at an art gallery.
"Absolutely beautiful, isn't it?" I asked the guy next to me. "The way the yellow combines with the grey. The way the colours intertwine. Truly remarkable."
He stepped away from the urinal and left.
My father told me not to make fun of people doing art or gender studied at University They might spit in my macdonalds fries in the future.
What's the difference between an Art major and a guy who mops bathrooms at KFC? One has a job.
What do you say to an art student with a job? "Uhh, I would like the Quarter Pounder with Cheese"
What is the difference between an art student and a dead baby? The dead baby can feed a family of four.
A person with a science degree asks "why does it work?" A person with an engineering degree asks: "how does it work?" A person with an accounting degree asks: "how much does it cost?" A person with an art degree asks: "do you want fries with that?"
A critic goes to an art gallery and finds the artist of the pieces there.
Critic: "Would you like to know what I think of your art?"
Artist: "Oh, yes please"
Critic: "It's useless"
Artist: "I know, but I would still like to hear it. "
An Art Thief is Sitting in His Driveway... He didn't have any Monet, to buy Degas, to make his Van Gogh.
In Art Class...
Teacher: Why did you submit a blank sheet?
Student: That's a cow in the field.
Teacher: Field? Where's the grass?
Student: The cow ate it.
Teacher: Then, where's the cow?
Student: There's no grass left, you expect it to stay there..?
I hate when Engineering students call themselves Engineers
Like Med students don't call themselves Doctors
And Art students don't call themselves Unemployed
I used to think it was pretentious that Subway call their staff “Sandwich Artists”. But I suppose it is the most likely career option for an Art graduate.
Art Gallery Nudes
A couple at an art gallery see a picture of a naked woman with only her privates covered with leaves.
The wife doesn't like it and moves on, but the husband keeps looking.
She asks, "What are you waiting for?"
He replies, "Autumn."
There’s a girl on my art course who never does any original work, she copies everything.
We call her Tracey.
Confederates are reverse Hitlers. Hitler first sucked at art and then lost the war while Confederates first lost the war and then sucked at art.
A musical canon piece is currently being hung from the art gallery ceiling for all to see. We tried asking a worker for directions, but he was too busy hanging a round.
“Known thy enemy” Sun Tzu-The Art of War “What?” -Colonel George Custer after the Battle of Little Bighorn.
My friend draws beautiful nudes, starting from the feet, up. They're amazing art but he always throws them all away... I think it's 'cuz he always finishes on the faces.
I’m posing nude for an art class this evening.
Nobody asked me to.
>!I think they’re making ceramic bowls.!<
The thief pulled out his gun, pointed it at the art gallery manager and said "This is a robbery, give me all your monet!"
One of my art students made a voodoo doll of me after I SPECIFICALLY told her not to. I feel like I've been stabbed in the back.
Karen visits an art gallery
Karen: I suppose this horrible looking thing is what you call modern art?
Art dealer: I beg your pardon Ma'am, that is a mirror.
A friend told me that he started but couldn't complete a book called "the subtle art of not giving a f**k" I replied - "but I think you got the point regardless!"
Visiting the Modern Art Museum , a lady turned to an attendant standing near by .
"This" she said " I suppose is one of those hideous representations you call Modern Art ?"
"No , madam " replied the attendant " That one's called a mirror "
I've perfected the art of clever comebacks Too bad I have no friends to talk to in first place.
My art teacher said my self portrait looked horrible However she did say it was extremely realistic and lifelike.
They say my fine art degree is useless. But I'll have you know I doubled my income last year!! Finding that quarter on the ground really helped.
Art of undressing
What's the difference between undressing a 21 year old woman & a 71 year old woman?
One eraser says to another
“Look at ‘em, that Art Gum thinks he is so great.”
“Calm down bud, isn’t it enough to be kneaded?”
One time I gave my honest thoughts on this dude’s art I said “I appreciate the effort, but you should really look into another career, Adolf”
I was walking through an art gallery when I saw a solid white cube. I looked closer but didn't find any details or artwork of any kind on it. Confused, I asked someone who was near me, who simply said "Oh, that's artist's block"
People are always making jokes about hitler getting rejected from art school. But if I was in that one guys shoes I would have rejected him too. The guy massacred 6 million Jews!
No child of my will ever participate in the unholy art of race mixing. If they want to do a triathlon, they will do three separate races like god intended
Chinese government is sending their deadliest commandos into Hong Kong They're all trained in the art of Kung-Flu.
I just bought an art piece featuring several Pikachus playing Texas Hold'em. It's called Pokermon.
My brother didn't get his dream job as sport color comentator. He now doesn't know what to do with his visual art degree.