Obama Jokes

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Funniest Obama Jokes

Obama smoked weed growing up, and now look where he is today Unemployed with two kids and recently evicted

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How do you get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb? You tell him Barack Obama installed it.

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Funny Obama Jokes
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Why did Obama get two terms? Because black men always get a longer sentence

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Why did Obama serve two terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence

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America is racist When Barack Obama gives his speech, he stands behind a bulletproof glass . That shows how racist America still is.

Just because he's black, doesn't mean he's going to shoot anyone



Thanks Frankie Boyle

Score: 710

How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got down on one knee and said, "I don't wanna be Obama self."

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Barack Obama goes to a costume party while giving his wife a piggyback ride. Someone asks him what he’s dressed up as and he responds “I’m a snail!” That’s M’Shell on my back

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Where does Obama keep his armies? In the Baracks.

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How do you get Trump to change a light bulb? Tell him Obama put it in.

Score: 590

Barack Obama is having a race with Joe Biden around the white house. After finishing the race Obama says "Whew, just under 10 minutes. Did I break the record?"

Biden replies "No, Bush did 9:11."

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What is a government mandate? When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.

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What did Barack say to Michele when he asked her to marry him? I don't wanna be Obama self.

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Obama and Trump are running laps around the White House... Obama and Trump are running laps around the White House, after three laps Trump excitedly yells "10 minutes exactly, well that has to be a new record!".

Obama says "I don't think so, Bush did 9:11".

Score: 425

Obvious media bias Michelle Obama gives a speech when her husband is being nominated, and the media is generally positive. Melania Trump gives the exact same speech, and the media pretends it's some kind of scandal.

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BREAKING: Barack Obama just elected President of the US - Sent from Internet Explorer

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What does Donald Trump tell Barack Obama supporters? Orange Is The New Black

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So President Trump wants to abolish the two term limit on the Presidency. Welcome back President Obama we missed you.

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My grandfather used to tell me "the day a black man becomes president is the day pigs will fly!" Sure enough, right after Obama took office, swine flu.

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It's interesting how different a US president looks at the end of their presidency. Obama had gray hair. Bush had a bunch of wrinkles.. At the end of JFKs presidency, half of his head was missing.

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The fact that president Obama needs four inches of bullet proof glass at every public speaking event, is proof that racism is still alive Just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot everyone.

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What was the codename for the transition from Obama to Trump? Orange is the new black

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What did Barack Obama say to Michelle when he proposed to her? I don't want to be Obama self.

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If Donald trump takes over the presidency after Obama I guess you could say orange really is the new black

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On the bright side... We can look forward to four more years of Michelle Obama speeches from our First Lady.

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What did Barack Obama said to Michelle when he proposed? "I don't want to be Obama-self"

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Obama smoked weed growing up and look where he is today Unemployed, with two kids and recently evicted

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I don't see why Obama gave all his speeches behind bulletproof glass.. I know he's black and all but I doubt he'd actually shoot anyone.

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Obama looks rough after the last 8 years in office. Still better than JFK after 2.

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If you switch the B and S in Osama bin Laden, it becomes Obama Sin-Laden . . . Some might consider that prophetic, others slanderous. But I say it's just flippin' BS.

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What did Barack Obama write inside his Valentines card? "I'm glad I've got you Michelle; I didn't want to be Obamaself"

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Why don't people in Kuwait know who Obama is? Because they've been living under Iraq.

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You know, people in the 1970s thought there would be a black president when pigs fly... Then Barack Obama was elected. And after a year, swine flu.

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If Donald Trump replaces Barack Obama in the White House Does that mean that orange is the new black?

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Michelle Obama gave a great speech last night I can't wait to hear it again at the next Republican National Convention.

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I am still waiting for Trump to eat a Snickers ... ... so he becomes Obama again

You're not you when you're hungry

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Why did Obama get two terms as President? Because every black man gets a longer sentence.

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You know, those people who insult Obama and the Clintons.. really need to stop beating around the Bush.

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Obama played the race card, Hillary played the gender card But America played the Trump Card

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Why did President Obama get two terms? Because every black man gets a longer sentence.

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Obama calls for greater truck control laws. Apparently the the truck in France had a fully automatic transmission.

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New Obama Jokes

Miss Obama stepped on a snail. What did the snail say? MESHELL!

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How to easily solve the #NoMandatoryMask movement. Obama said nobody should wear a mask

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Trump hears Obama got a smaller crowd than him "Really? What was he doing?" Trump asks gleefully

"Ordering breakfast at McDonalds drive thru." His aide said.

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I like my coffee like Barack Obama a blend of Kenyan and Kona

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What is Trump doing down in the bunker right now? He’s down there restocking the “cupboards” that President Obama left empty.

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President Obama says there are many people in charge in the Trump Administration who don't know what they're doing It's a case of too many crooks in the kitchen.

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What do you get when you mix barrack Obama with Bruce lee? Broccoli

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Children born in the USA from 2008 to now haven’t had a white president It’s because Obama is black and Trump is orange.

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You know, I never understood why Obama had to give his speeches behind bulletproof glass. I mean, I know he's black and all, but I highly doubt he's going to shoot anyone.

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What would the headline be if Barack Obama walked on water across a lake in full view of a Fox News reporter? "OBAMA CAN'T SWIM"

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What's the difference between a rained on Barack Obama and Mike Pence? When you ask them to go rainbow hunting Obama grabs his camera and Pence grabs his gun.

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Call me Barack Cause I'll be spending this Valentine's Obama self

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I had a dream Obama was still President. An evil robot Neobama came in to demand his surrender. Let me try to explain how Obama responded to this demand: S-s-sorry, uh uh uh, i-i I, uh, I uh uh, i-i can't

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First there was Obama care, then there is Trump care Now can we get some healthcare?

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I’m glad Obama killed Osama Bin Laden Before Trump could become friends with him.

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How do you persuade Trump to believe climate change is happening? You tell him Obama didn't care about it.

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Donald Trump is the best president since Obama

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Obama doesn't live in a house He lives in a Barack

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How do you get trump to change a lightbulb You tell him Obama put it in

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How do you get Trump to change a lightbulb? Tell him Obama installed it

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If Obama were to run once more and promise Trump he’d double-down on all of Trump’s policies except the migrant camps in exchange for support Trump would be stuck between Barack and a hard place

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What did Obama say when Michelle left him “How could you leave Obama self”

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What did Obama say when Michael left him “How could you leave me Obama self”

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What did Kyle Carpenter say to Obama while receiving the Medal of Honor? edit: Thanks for the gold kind stranger

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If Michelle Obama was Barack Obama’s sister where would they live? Al-Obama

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Why isn't Dora allowed to explore Syria? Because Obama told her "no Boots on the ground!"

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“Cocaine’s a helluva drug” - Malia Obama (probably)

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If Obama declared bankruptcy and started living on the streets, what would be his Economic Status? Baroque

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When Obama gave his first speech as president he was behind bulletproof glass I don't think it's fair.. just cuz he black don't mean he gunna shoot anyone

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Neither President Obama nor President Trump has done anything for the people of Mississippi. For example, they still live there.

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How did Barrack Obama propose? He got on one knee and said, "I don't want to be obamaself"

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Obama smoked weed, and now look where he is today Unemployed with two kids and evicted

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Barack Obama walks into a Subaru dealership... The salesman asked him, "What are you looking for?"

Obama says, "I'm looking for a replacement because my legacy got wrecked."

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Obama walks into a Toyota dealership And tries to by a Legacy...

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Why did it always take so long for President Obama to get into the presidential limo? The driver got scared and kept pressing the door lock button when he saw him approach.

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What did barack say to Michelle I don’t want to be Obama self

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How did Obama propose to Michelle? He got down to one knee, pulled out the ring and said "I don't want to be obamaself"

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At least everyone can agree on one thing As president, Trump speaks the truth almost as often as Obama lied

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We are going to need to re-elect Obama once Trump is done... to go on an apology tour.

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Bush, Clinton, Trump, and Obama decided to have a race. Trump went first. His time was 9 minutes and 50 seconds. Obama did a bit better. He finished the race in 9 minutes and 45 seconds. Clinton came in 9 minutes and 24 seconds. And Bush did 9:11.

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In 2016, Obama left Trump and Hillary as the 2 choices for president. Thanks, Obama.

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Why did Obama win the presidential race? Because Kenyan’s usually win in the long run.

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It's a real shame that, in this day and age, Barrack Obama had to give his speech about Martin Luther King Jr., while standing behind bullet proof glass... Just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot somebody...

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Bush, Clinton, Obama, and Trump decided to have a race. Trump went first. He finished the race in 10 minutes and 30 seconds. Obama did a bit better. His time was 10 minutes and 14 seconds. Clinton came in at 9 minutes and 49 seconds. And Bush did 9:11.

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What did Putin say to Obama when he annexed Ukraine? Crimea river.

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Trump and Obama are taking a jog... Trump and Obama are taking a jog around the White House. When they finish, they look at the time on their stopwatches.

"Phew, just under 10 minutes!" Says Obama.

Trump says - "shame, Bush managed to do 9:11"

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Obama care is religious discrimination We shouldn’t try to prevent Americans from being Sikh!

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What do Stephen Curry and Obama have in common? They like to drop it from a distance.

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I don't understand why Obama had to give his speeches behind bullet proof glass. I mean, I know he's black and all, but I doubt he'll shoot anyone.

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What did Putin say to Obama when Russia annexed Crimea? Crimea river.

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The NRA showed Trump and Obama the newest NRA advertisement and asked what they thought. At the same time, Trump and Obama sternly said... "Stick to your guns."

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Lonely Obama What is the previous president, Mr. Barack's, go to song when he is lonely?
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O-ba-ma-self..don't wanna be!

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Has anyone else noticed During most of the speeches Obama gave, he was behind bullet proof glass? I know he was black and all, but I doubt he would of shot anyone.

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How is my wallet like the Obama administration? Not enough change

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Why did Obama serve 2 terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence.

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What did Donald Trump replace Obama Care with? Don.T. Care

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Just last week a smiling Barack Obama overpaid for hot dogs at my stand, but kindly insisted I "keep the change, son, I don't want it" It was at this moment I realized how far our beloved president had truly fallen.

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I had a chat with Barack Obama today... My mum was confused as to why I was talking to the microwave.

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Putin, Obama and Trump walk into a bar... ... the bartender looks up and says: "This isn't funny anymore!"

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What do you call a President who likes classical music? Baroque Obama

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I thought Republicans were the stupidest people in the world for calling Obama "Hussein" Then I saw the Democrats call Trump "Drumpf"

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