Obama Jokes

Contents

Funniest Obama Jokes

Obama smoked weed growing up, and now look where he is today Unemployed with two kids and recently evicted

Score: 21255

How do you get Donald Trump to change a lightbulb? You tell him Barack Obama installed it.

Score: 17308
Funny Obama Jokes
Score: 1979

Why did Obama get two terms? Because black men always get a longer sentence

Score: 1888

Hillary Clinton lost last time to the first African American president, Barack Obama. Why will she lose this one to Donald Trump? Because orange is the new black.

Score: 935

Why did Obama serve two terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence

Score: 900

What did Melania Trump say to her speech writer? Thanks, Obama.

Score: 871

America is racist When Barack Obama gives his speech, he stands behind a bulletproof glass . That shows how racist America still is.

Just because he's black, doesn't mean he's going to shoot anyone



Thanks Frankie Boyle

Score: 710

How did Barack propose to Michelle? He got down on one knee and said, "I don't wanna be Obama self."

Score: 649

Where does Obama keep his armies? In the Baracks.

Score: 602

Barack Obama is having a race with Joe Biden around the white house. After finishing the race Obama says "Whew, just under 10 minutes. Did I break the record?"

Biden replies "No, Bush did 9:11."

Score: 563

What is a government mandate? When Obama and Biden go out to dinner together.

Score: 535

What did Barack say to Michele when he asked her to marry him? I don't wanna be Obama self.

Score: 429

Obama and Trump are running laps around the White House... Obama and Trump are running laps around the White House, after three laps Trump excitedly yells "10 minutes exactly, well that has to be a new record!".

Obama says "I don't think so, Bush did 9:11".

Score: 425

They said "orange is the new black"... ...but I didn't realise they meant Trump would replace Obama.

Score: 358

Obvious media bias Michelle Obama gives a speech when her husband is being nominated, and the media is generally positive. Melania Trump gives the exact same speech, and the media pretends it's some kind of scandal.

Score: 332

BREAKING: Barack Obama just elected President of the US - Sent from Internet Explorer

Score: 301

What does Donald Trump tell Barack Obama supporters? Orange Is The New Black

Score: 248

It's interesting how different a US president looks at the end of their presidency. Obama had gray hair. Bush had a bunch of wrinkles.. At the end of JFKs presidency, half of his head was missing.

Score: 234

Why did the Jew vote for Obama? Because he promised change.

Score: 218

Dear President Obama, I've got a joke for you... I texted it to Angela Merkel. Did you... *get it*?

Score: 211

The fact that president Obama needs four inches of bullet proof glass at every public speaking event, is proof that racism is still alive Just because he's black doesn't mean he's going to shoot everyone.

Score: 200

What was the codename for the transition from Obama to Trump? Orange is the new black

Score: 195

What did Barack Obama say to Michelle when he proposed to her? I don't want to be Obama self.

Score: 181

If Donald trump takes over the presidency after Obama I guess you could say orange really is the new black

Score: 174

If Donald Trump replaces Obama.... ...Does that mean Orange is the new Black?

Score: 154

On the bright side... We can look forward to four more years of Michelle Obama speeches from our First Lady.

Score: 154

What did Barack Obama said to Michelle when he proposed? "I don't want to be Obama-self"

Score: 135

Obama smoked weed growing up and look where he is today Unemployed, with two kids and recently evicted

Score: 134

I don't see why Obama gave all his speeches behind bulletproof glass.. I know he's black and all but I doubt he'd actually shoot anyone.

Score: 124

What did Barack Obama write inside his Valentines card? "I'm glad I've got you Michelle; I didn't want to be Obamaself"

Score: 77

If Donald Trump replaces Barack Obama in the White House Does that mean that orange is the new black?

Score: 70

Why did Obama get two terms as President? Because every black man gets a longer sentence.

Score: 66

I am still waiting for Trump to eat a Snickers ... ... so he becomes Obama again

You're not you when you're hungry

Score: 66

You know, those people who insult Obama and the Clintons.. really need to stop beating around the Bush.

Score: 55

Trump was cleaning his gun in Trump Tower... Kellyanne Conway walks in and asks,

Kellyanne: "Why do you have a gun?"

Trump: "Obama Spy Drones"

Kellyanne: \*laughs\*

Trump: \*laughs\*

Microwave: \*laughs\*

Trump shoots the Microwave.

Score: 33

Obama used the race card. Hillary used the woman card. America used the Trump card.

Score: 32

Why did Barack Obama get 2 terms? Because black people always get a "longer sentence"

Score: 27

My Dad got a Chia Obama head a couple of years ago. The box said he would grow an afro, but nothing changed.

Score: 24

Why did Obama serve 2 terms? Because blacks always get a longer sentence.

Score: 22

Popular Topics

New Obama Jokes

Obama said in an interview that Putin had asked him "How is Joe?" to which he responded "Biden?" then Russian President replied "Joe Mama"

Score: 3

What was Obama's foreign policy like? It was the very model of a modern multilateral.

Score: 3

America under Barrack's presidency... ...was an Obama-nation.

Score: 1

After the middle eastern people met obama, they were soon tired and bored. He kept droning on.

Score: 0

What do you get when you cross Obama, Bruce Lee, and the Irish? Barack O’Lee

Score: 0

First there was Obama care, then there is Trump care Now can we get some healthcare?

Score: 3

I’m glad Obama killed Osama Bin Laden Before Trump could become friends with him.

Score: 6

What did Obama say when Michelle left him “How could you leave Obama self”

Score: 2

What did Obama say when Michael left him “How could you leave me Obama self”

Score: 1

Why isn't Dora allowed to explore Syria? Because Obama told her "no Boots on the ground!"

Score: 1

If Obama declared bankruptcy and started living on the streets, what would be his Economic Status? Baroque

Score: 2

Obama walks into a Toyota dealership And tries to by a Legacy...

Score: 2

In 2016, Obama left Trump and Hillary as the 2 choices for president. Thanks, Obama.

Score: 5

Why did Obama win the presidential race? Because Kenyan’s usually win in the long run.

Score: 1

A man wakes up in the hospital after electrocuting himself... Doctor: What is your name?

Man: Steven

Doctor: Good. Who is the current US President?

Man: Obama

Doctor: Oh no that is incorrect it is President Trump

Man: Dammit it didn't work

Score: 6

What do Stephen Curry and Obama have in common? They like to drop it from a distance.

Score: 1

I don't understand why Obama had to give his speeches behind bullet proof glass. I mean, I know he's black and all, but I doubt he'll shoot anyone.

Score: 2

The US president is an Abomination... Bet most of you miss when the US was an Obama-Nation.

Score: 2

What did Putin say to Obama when Russia annexed Crimea? Crimea river.

Score: 5

The NRA showed Trump and Obama the newest NRA advertisement and asked what they thought. At the same time, Trump and Obama sternly said... "Stick to your guns."

Score: 1

Lonely Obama What is the previous president, Mr. Barack's, go to song when he is lonely?
.
.
O-ba-ma-self..don't wanna be!

Score: 1

Has anyone else noticed During most of the speeches Obama gave, he was behind bullet proof glass? I know he was black and all, but I doubt he would of shot anyone.

Score: 18

How is my wallet like the Obama administration? Not enough change

Score: 2

What did Donald Trump replace Obama Care with? Don.T. Care

Score: 5

Just last week a smiling Barack Obama overpaid for hot dogs at my stand, but kindly insisted I "keep the change, son, I don't want it" It was at this moment I realized how far our beloved president had truly fallen.

Score: 6

Putin, Obama and Trump walk into a bar... ... the bartender looks up and says: "This isn't funny anymore!"

Score: 9

What do you call a President who likes classical music? Baroque Obama

Score: 2

Obama was offered to get his face carved into Mount Rushmore But he declined. He didn't want to get ahead of himself.

Score: 5

What did Barrack say when he was all alone? [1/2 OC] Here I am Obama self...
Like a crab in Michelle.

Score: 1

Did you know Obama was from Hawaii Kenya believe it?

Score: 4

Obama was the Antichrist & Trump is a facist dictator Either America has grown more tolerant or liberals don't believe in the Antichrist.

Score: 0

So, Obama commuted 330 sentences today. Trump doesn't even know that many.

Score: 1

Obama proved a black man can even be president.. And that no matter how high up a black man gets he can't get out of government housing!

Score: 8

What did Obama say after his mom finished serving dinner? "Thanks Omama."

Score: 2

Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama are running for president in 2020 Honestly...

It's black and white

Score: 1

Why was Obama nervous when eating a T-bone aboard Air Force One? Because the steaks had never been higher.

Score: 3

Do you think Obama's going to deal with Russia while he's still in office? Nah, I think he's Biden his time.

Score: 1

What did Hillary say when she bumped into Barack Obama at the White House? Pardon me.

Score: 14

Trump had a very calm considerate speech for the election Can we confirm Michelle Obama did not write it?

Score: 1

How Donald Trump's meeting with Barack Obama on Thursday will go down: Trump: "Barry, you're fired"

Score: 2

Definite proof Obama is related to Kenya They both can't rap.

Score: 1

9/11 gave rise to "Truthers", Obama gave rise to "Birthers", so... ... would a movement to determine whether Hillary Clinton actually carries hot sauce in her purse be called "Saucers"?

Score: 1

Hillary went for dinner with Barack Obama the other day I heard he was very polite, but hillary brought her own private server.

Score: 5

What did Obama say when he was alone? Obamaself

Score: 7

What's it called when Obama and Paul Ryan meet up for dinner? A government mandate.

Score: 1

So Donald Trump wants Barack Obama and Bill Gates to talk about shutting down the internet. Shouldn't Al Gore be a part of that conversation?

Score: 2

Michelle Obama was not the first person to think of the "Turnip for what" She was the First Lady

Score: 1

Popular Topics