Hilarious Mermaid Jokes That Will Make You Laugh

Funniest Mermaid Jokes

Score: 2018

Why did the mermaid rush out of her maths exam, red faced and embarrassed? Because her algaebra didn't hold up.

Score: 1715

Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? She outgrew her B shells.

Score: 542

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because she is too big for B-shells

Score: 323

A human asks a mermaid why she wears seashells Mermaid: I grew out of my B-shells

Score: 286

What did the mermaid forget to bring to math class? Her algae bra

Score: 282

How does a pregnant mermaid give birth? "Sea-section"

Sorry, I thought of that last night and just had to share my genius with the world.

Score: 281

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because she grew out of her b-shells.

Score: 211

What do you call a mermaid who's a prostitute? H-2-Hoe

Score: 180

Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells for a bra? Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big!

Score: 119

What does a mermaid wear to a Maths class ? An algaebra.

Note: Not my original. I had read this somewhere a few years ago. Kudos to the original creator.

Score: 90

Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because she grew out of her B- shells!

Score: 76

What does a mermaid mathematician wear? An algae bra!

Score: 74

Why does The Little Mermaid wear seashells? Cuz she grew out of her B shell

*im so sorry*

Score: 68

A man asked a mermaid "Why do you wear seashells ?" The mermaid replied "I grew out of my B-shells"

Score: 59

Why does the little mermaid wear sea-shells? Cause B-shells are too small, and D- shells are too big.

Score: 51

Why does the Little Mermaid wear sea shells? Because D shells are too big and B shells are too small.

Score: 45

Why does the little mermaid wear sea shells? She's not big enough for d shells.

Score: 43

Do you know why the Little Mermaid wore seashells? Because she was too small for D shells.

Score: 42

Why did the mermaid wear sea shells? Cause she was too big for B- shells!

(my 6 year old niece likes to tell this joke)

Score: 42

What did the Little Mermaid wear to math class? Her algae bra.

Score: 37

Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells? Because B-shells are too small, and D-shells are too big.

Score: 35

What does a mermaid wear to math class An algae-bra

I'm not sorry

Score: 35

Why did the Little Mermaid run away with the fisherman? He had allure.

Score: 34

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because the D shells are too big, and the B shells are too small.

Score: 28

What do the Washington Metro system and the Little Mermaid have in common? They're both under DC.

Score: 28

Why did the mermaid wear SeaShells? Because she outgrew her B-Shells. Ha...

Score: 28

What did the mermaid wear to her math class? An algae bra.

Score: 26

You guys hear about the half of a mermaid that washed up on shore? It's only a tale...

Score: 25

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because D shells are too big.

Score: 24

How does a mermaid give birth? By sea-section!

Score: 23

Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She grew out of her b-shells.

Score: 22

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because B shells are to small and D shells are to big.

Score: 21

Two fishermen caught a mermaid. One of them holding the mermaid in his arms looked at her attentively and threw her back into the sea.
But why? - asked the other fisherman.
But how? - answered the first one.

Score: 20

Why does a mermaid wear Seashells? She grew out of her B-Shells.

Score: 18

I once dated a mermaid I didn't believe her at first, due to the human legs. But the smell was unmistakable.

Score: 18

What does a Mermaid bring to math class? An algae-bra.

Score: 18

Was The Little Mermaid directed by a pilot? Because it's mostly Ariel footage.

Score: 18

What does the Little Mermaid put on before math class? An Algebra

Score: 17

What got the mermaid pregnant? Sea men.

Score: 17

Did you hear that the Air Force just bought a bunch of copies of The Little Mermaid on DVD? They must be preparing for an Ariel assault.

Score: 16

New Mermaid Jokes

A short joke translated from Latvian Mermaid doing a split

Score: 1

What does a mermaid wash their fins with? Tide

Score: 3

Why does a mermaid wear seashells Because she outgrew her B-shells

Score: 6

Why does a mermaid wear sea shells? She outgrew her B shells

Score: 4

How does a mermaid wash its tail It uses tide

Score: 8

A human asks a mermaid why she wears seashells Mermaid: Cause I grew out of my B-shells

Score: 2

A girl I am dating said, "I expect to be treated like a Disney Princess." So I told her to pretend she is the Little Mermaid and stop talking.

Score: 6

What font does the mermaid use when typing? Ariel

Score: 3

What do you call a mermaid who identifies as a man? Transatlantic.

Score: 2

Why didn't the mermaid finish high school? Because her grades were always under the C

Score: 3

What do you call mermaid prostitutes? SeaWhores

Score: 5

Two fisherman sit in a small boat close to the shore Suddenly one of them pulls a mermaid out of the water, shakes his head, unhooks her and throws her back into the water.

The other one is dumbfounded and asks: "Why?"

To which he answers: "How?"

Score: 2

What do you call a mermaid prostitute? h2-ho

Score: 2

What is the similarities between ariel the mermaid and my love life? They're fictional

Score: 1

Do you think Disney wanted a ginger for the little mermaid But the casting director was dyslexic?

Score: 4

[Offensive] The director of the live-action Little Mermaid sent a note to his casting director: "we need an actress to play Ariel. Find a ginger." The casting director was dyslexic.

Score: 10

With the hype for Ariel The Mermaid remake. I made a suggestion to Disney, but they banned me from their website Apparently suggesting a remake of Tarzan with a black man was a bad idea.

Score: 4

The old Little Mermaid script was written in Arial The new one is written in Arial Black

Score: 2

Did you guys hear about the half of a mermaid that washed up on shore? It's only a tail.

Score: 3

Why was the mermaid couple so indecisive? Because they both refused to wear the pants in the relationship.

Score: 14

Mermaids Why did the mermaid wear seashells on her chest?

Because B shells were too small and D shells were too big!

Score: 6

I think I met a mermaid the other day She said, "I like sitting on the beach but my other half likes swimming"

Score: 1

What do you call a mermaid that can fly Ariel

Score: 7

What does a mermaid smoke? Seaweed

Score: 2

Was a wedding planner to a Mermaid couple once, but got such a terrible review Apparently serving shrimp cocktails at the reception was not such a good idea

Score: 1

What does a mermaid use to clean her fin? Tide.

Score: 1

What does a mermaid wash her fins with? Tide!

Score: 4

What did the mermaid use to wash her fins ? Tide.

Score: 1

Did you guys hear about the half a mermaid that washed up on shore? It's only a tale.

Score: 5

Did you guys here about the half a mermaid that washed up on shore? It's only a tale

Score: 2

What does a mermaid use to clean her tail? Tide!

Score: 9

Why does the little mermaid wear seashells? Because B shells were too small and D shells were too big!

Score: 13

Mermaid Mafia Did you hear the one about the mermaid prostitute that got on the wrong side of the Mafia?

She's sleeping with the fishes now.

Score: 2

Why did the little mermaid wear sea shells? Because D-shells were too big for her.

Score: 5

What does a math-loving mermaid usually wear? Algebra.

Score: 7

What kind of bra did the Little Mermaid wear? An Algebra

(Algae Bra)

Score: 3

Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells on her chest? Because B shells are too small and D shells are too big

Score: 7

A mermaid finally got off the couch and hit the gym once she found a dolphin physical trainer. She moved with a porpoise.

Score: 3

I remember after The Little Mermaid all the girls wanted to be mermaids. I asked "What do you know about breathing in water?" to one and she said... "I wouldn't know anything about it, but Natalie Wood"

Score: 1

Why did the heavyset mermaid wear a turtleneck? So you wouldn't sea urchins!

Score: 11

What does a mermaid use to wash her fin? Tide.

Score: 7

What did the mermaid wear to math class? An algae-bra

Credit: Grandpa breaking the ice at the dinner table

Score: 5

What do you call a mermaid orgy? Polymermaid

Score: 2

Why did the mermaid start wearing seashells? She grew out of B shells.

Score: 16

What does a mermaid wash her fin with? Tide.

Score: 3

Why does the little mermaid wear c-shells? Because she grew out of her b-shells!

Score: 2

Why does the Little Mermaid wear seashells? Because she outgrew her B-Shells!

Score: 10

Why did the little mermaid wear sea shells? Because a shells and B shells were too small.

Score: 1

Why was the mermaid wearing seashells? Because she grew out of her b shells

Score: 4

Why does the mermaid wear seashells? Because she grew out of her B shells.

Score: 4

Why did the mermaid wear seashells? Because the B shells were too small and the D shells were too big.

Score: 6

Why does the Little Mermaid wear sea shells? Because she doesn't fit into B shells

Score: 4

Why couldn't the little mermaid get into college? Her GPA was unda da C.

Score: 6

What did the mermaid forget to bring to the maths lesson? Her algae bra.

Score: 2

(Corny)-What do you call a mermaid on a roof? Aerial

Score: 16

What swims slightly faster than a shark? The Little Mermaid on her period.

Score: 2

What does a mermaid mathematicion wear? An Algae-bra.

Score: 15

Why did the comedian mermaid die ? Because it had a dry sense of humor .

Score: 3

BOY: Dad , is a mermaid girl or a fish ? DAD : Well son that depends weather you are HORNY or HUNGRY .

Score: 7

Was told to turn on the water hose I was told to turn on the water hose.

Responded
"I don't know anything about mermaid sexuality"

Score: 5

How did the mermaid prostitute make all her money? Blue whales

Score: 8