Goat Jokes

Contents

Funniest Goat Jokes

There were 3 blondes walking on a trail... The first blonde said "Those look like deer tracks!"

The second blonde said "No those are totally moose tracks... "

The third blonde said "Nope, they are goat tracks!"

Then a train hit them

Funny Goat Jokes

What happens when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo.

Some people say filling animals with helium is wrong but i say, whatever floats your goat

If you buy a goat for $10 and named him Mohammed, then sell it for $15. Did you make a prophet?

Some say filling animals with helium is wrong But I say whatever floats your goat

What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo...

What do you get when you cross human DNA with goat DNA? A ban from the petting zoo.

What do you get when you cross goat DNA with human DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo

What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out the petting zoo...

What do you get when you mix goat DNA with human DNA Kicked out of the petting zoo

Two goats were behind a Hollywood movie studio eating an old movie film. One goat said to the other, "Pretty good, huh?"
The second goat said, "Yeah, but not as good as the book".

How did the Muslim find the goat in the field? Very Satisfying.

How does an Arab farmer find his goat in the sand dunes? Very satisfying.

What do you get when you inject a goat with human DNA? A ban from the petting zoo.

Two goats chew on a VHS tape. The first goat says "*This film is pretty good"* and the other one replies: "*Yeah, it's OK but the book was better."*

What happens if you mix goat DNA and human DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo.

My wife said we each needed to make sacrifices to make our relationship work. She was less than impressed with the dead goat I left in our kitchen.

What do you get when you combine a goat egg and a goat sperm? A Zy-Goat

I'll escort myself out.

How did the redneck find the goat in the tall grass? Satisfying.

What do you get when you attempt to mix human and goat DNA? ...Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What do you call a goat that likes cleaning? A roomba-a-aa-aa.


(you have to make a goat sound when saying it)

My ex said that relationships were about sacrifice. But she still screamed when she saw the bloody goat on the altar.

What did the goat say when it walked across the street? Baaah

I wanted to play Goat Simulator... ...but my PC doesn't have enough RAM.

What do you get when you mix human and goat DNA? A lifetime ban from the zoo

Me: I have trained this goat to talk. Karen: This would be fun to see.

Me[to goat]: Who do i love the most?

Goat: Mee

Me[to goat]: Who's my pet?

Goat: Mee

Karen: Ah, its boring

Me: Wait it gets better

Goat: It gets way better, Karen!

DNA What do you get when you mix human and goat DNA?


[Kicked out of the zoo.](/spoiler)

Where do you find a goat with no legs? Right where you left it.

What do you get when you cross human DNA with goat DNA? ....Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What do you get when you add human DNA with goat DNA I don't know but I was kicked out of the petting zoo..

What do you get when you mix human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What do you call a goat that works at a bakery? A battering ram

What did the Goat living in Manama say when it starting raining? "BAAAHH RAIN!"

What's the difference between a baby and A goat? When my goat died, I couldn't bring myself to eat it.

What do you get when you cross human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What’s the difference between a goat and a kid? My neighbour isn’t unknowingly raising my goats.

What’s the difference between a goat and a kid? My neighbour isn’t unknowingly raising two of my goats.

What's the difference between a mountain goat and a goldfish? A goldfish mucks about the fountain.

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New Goat Jokes

Where does an angry goat write down its problems? On the ram-page

A goat shaved away it's beard and remarked Not by the glare of my chinny chin chin

What does rapping and mountain climbing have in common? A white goat is the best at them both.

What did the papa goat say to the mama goat when she was giving birth? You've goat to be kidding me!

I saw a cartoon portraying a politican like a goat It was satyr.

What is Magnus Carlsen's favorite cheese? Goat cheese.

Mrs. Goat : Honey, we're going to have a baby! Mr. Goat : You're kidding.

I was banging a goat and I asked her if she was into it, she said: Mehhhh

What do you call a goat with a pancreatic disorder? Diableatus.

What do you get when mixing human DNA and goat DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.

What do goat veal, most of the jokes in new, and an anti-vaxxer's household have in common? They're all full of dead kids.

How did the arab find the goat in the dessert? Satisfying

A female sheep walks into a bar with a baby cow and a baby goat Bartender says: Ewe Calf to be Kidding me!

What does a goat without lips say? "eh, eh, eh"

An American walks into a flea market in Albania... ...and see's the finest goat they've ever seen.

They're not even hungry, but they ask the stall how much, anyway.

The stall replies, "Ms. Veseli is not for sale".

A skeleton, a dinosaur, and a goat walked into a bar, what did the bartender say? Boneapple tea?

A man goes to a farm to purchase the most pregnant looking goat Long story short that kids is how I met your mother

A goat tells her boyfriend she's pregnant. He immediately replies, "What? You're kidding!"

To which she replies back, "Yeah, that's what I said."

What do you get when you cross human DNA with goat DNA? You get kicked out of the petting zoo.

So a goat was found dead on it's house The police report said, that the goat overdosed on Crystal Mehhh

My dyslexic friend just turned up at the toga party Dressed as a goat

What does a goat say when it hears a good suggestion? Sounds Gouda me

Russian joke Two peasants, Boris and Igor are poor. Boris has a goat. Igor does not. One day while walking thru the woods, Igor meets a fairy. "What do you wish for?" She ask.

"I wish" Igor says "that Boris's goat should die"

Last weekend I was accused of being dyslexic at a party... I think they were just jealous of my goat costume, because nobody else put in *any* effort. For some reason they all decided to just wear bed sheets to the goat party.

A goat goes into labor. She screams "I'm dying!" Her husband asks "really?" She replies "no I'm kidding"

Goat birth is called kidding A goat goes into labor. She screams "I'm dying!" Her husband asks "Really?" She replies "No, I'm kidding."

What do you get when you mix human DNA with goat DNA? Kicked out of the zoo.

It's way easier to drink goat milk than you'd think. It's getting the grass stains out of your clothes that's the hard part.

I phoned up the spiritual leader of Tibet... He sent me a large goat with a really long neck...Turns out I phoned Dial-a-Llama

What is the best cheese in the history of the world? GOAT cheese

Lionel Messi used to be the GOAT Now he's just ba-aaa-aaad

Non believers say it is impossible for a virgin to have kids... ... but my socially awkward friend Mitchell owns a goat farm - and he has plenty of kids!

Id love to get mad at my baby goat when she headbutts. But you cant blame her. Shes just a kid.

What do you get after mixing goat & human DNA? Kicked out of the petting zoo.

There was a goat on the busiest street in town today He was horny on main

What did the goat say to shepherd's wife ? Part - 2 Nothing, Goat still can't speak.

What did the goat say to shepherd's wife? Goats can't speak.

What do you call a rich goat herder? A billy-ionaire!

People tell me filling animals with helium is bad I say Whatever floats your goat

The vulture dragged a dead goat onto the plane. Don't worry, he said to the attendant. It's just my carrion.

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Long Goat Jokes

Happy stories from a remote village

A journalist goes to a poor remote village for a documentary.

He saw an old man and asked him to narrate a typical happy story of his village.

The old man smiled and began:
"One day, a long time ago, my goat got lost in the mountains. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink vodka first and then looked for the goat. When we finally found her, as is our tradition, we all drank some more vodka and all the men in the village each got their turn to mate with the goat. We had so much fun that day!"

The journalist realized that he couldn't publish such a story so he asked the old man if he had another happy story.

The old man smiled again and started all over again:
"Once, my neighbor’s wife got lost in the mountains. As per our tradition, all of the village's men gathered to drink vodka and then went to look for her. As is our tradition, when we finally found her, all the men in the village got their turn to mate with the neighbor’s wife. We had great fun that day!"

The journalist couldn't publish that story either and therefore asked: "Don't you have a story that is less happy; something... umm ... sadder?"

The old man's smile faded. His eyes welled up..... In a sad, soft voice he began:

“One day I got lost in the mountains.....”

Sadder ending ....

A journalist goes to Afganistan for a documentary. In a little village he saw an old man and asked him to narrate a typical happy story of his village.

The old man smiled and began:"One day, a long time ago, my goat got lost in the mountains. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink vodka first and then looked for the goat. When we finally found her, as is our tradition, we all drank some more vodka and all the men in the village each got their turn to mate with the goat. We had so much fun that day!"

The journalist realized that he couldn't publish such a story so he asked the old man if he had another happy story.

The old man smiled again and started all over again: "Once, my neighbor’s wife got lost in the mountains. As per our tradition, all of the village's men gathered to drink vodka and then went to look for her. As is our tradition, when we finally found her, all the men in the village got their turn to mate with the neighbor’s wife. We had great fun that day!"

The journalist couldn't publish that story either and therefore asked: "Don't you have a story that is less happy; something... umm ... sadder?"

The old man's smile faded. His eyes welled up..... In a sad, soft voice he began: "One day I got lost in the mountains....."

Old Arabic joke going to translate the best I can

Their was a goat farmer named Kassim and his wife and one day the wife went to feed the goats. Unfortunately for her the male goat was particularly aggressive that day and mauled her to death. During her funeral the farmers brother Khalid came from another town. His brother Khalid was amazed how many people showed up to the funeral said "Kassim look how many people came to pay their respects to your wife you and her must be beloved in the area." In tears Kassim says " they are not here for the funeral they are here hoping to buy the goat".

A goat gets his wish granted by a genie.

He wishes to be turned into a human being. After his transformation, the, now, man is so grateful to the genie. He asks "How can I ever repay you?"

The genie just has this request: That the man make the most of his life and live like no man has lived before; love like no man has loved before; and care like no man has cared before. The man obliges.

He first sets out to find his "calling". Over the years, he works many jobs. He finds himself becoming depressed with the monotony that he has come to know. Finally, he decides to go back to his roots and do what he knows. He becomes a farmer. With the money he has accumulated from his many professions, he buys a large farm where he decides to take in unwanted and ill animals. Goats (obviously), pigs, cows, cats, dogs, and various other animals. He cares for them. He comes to know and understand them. He has a deep connection with them.

One day, a woman brings her dog to the man's farm. She is worried about the dog. She says ever since the dog's sibling died, he hasn't seemed right. The man agrees to take the dog and care for it. He knows the other animals will comfort it and the dog will enjoy his new family. The woman comes to visit the dog regularly. She becomes familiar with all of the other animals on the farm, and most of all, the man. They spend hours together each visit. Talking and taking care of the animals together. Hours turn to days. Days to weeks. The man asks the woman to live with him and his animals. The woman obliges. They are in love. They are truly happy.

The genie comes to the man one night in his dreams. The genie says to the man "You have lived like no other man; you have loved like no other man; and you have cared like no other man. You have done well".

The man wakes up the next morning and he doesn't feel well. He can't explain it, but somethings not right. Weeks go by and the man's condition seems to worsen. His doctors cannot explain his rapidly deteriorating health. The woman is always by his side when she's not caring for his animals. The woman's dog sleeps at the foot of his bed. Never leaving. At last, it seems like he cannot hold on for much longer. He's barely able to speak at this point. He motions for the woman to come near. He says to her "Do you want to know why I fell in love with you all those years ago? Do you want to know why I love you more and more every day?"

She says, "Yes, my love, tell me."

With his final breath, he tells her "Because you make me feel like a kid again."

Two hunters were walking around in the woods around twilight

One of them grabs the other and pulls him back from a 6-foot diameter, perfectly smooth hole.

"You saved my life" says the hunter. "I wonder how far down that hole goes..."

So they find an old anvil and throw it in the hole. As they're listening for the anvil to hit, a goat comes running up behind them, about 20 miles per hour, and dives into the hole.

A farmer comes along and asks the hunters if they've seen a goat. One responds "We're so sorry, we saw your goat run up behind us and he dove into this hole."

The farmer responds "That's impossible, I had him chained to an anvil."

A journalist goes to Russia for a documentary. In a little village he saw an old man and asked him to narrate a typical happy story of his village.

The old man smiled and began:"One day, a long time ago, my goat got lost in the mountains. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink vodka first and then looked for the goat. When we finally found her, as is our tradition, we all drank some more vodka and all the men in the village each got their turn to mate with the goat. We had so much fun that day!"

The journalist realized that he couldn't publish such a story so he asked the old man if he had another happy story.

The old man smiled again and started all over again: "Once, my neighbor’s wife got lost in the mountains. As per our tradition, all of the village's men gathered to drink vodka and then went to look for her. As is our tradition, when we finally found her, all the men in the village got their turn to mate with the neighbor’s wife. We had great fun that day!"

The journalist couldn't publish that story either and therefore asked: "Don't you have a story that is less happy; something... umm ... sadder?"

The old man's smile faded. His eyes welled up..... In a sad, soft voice he began: "One day I got lost in the mountains.....

Two hunters were walking in the woods...

One of them stops and says, "Whoa, whoa! Watch out for that hole!".

They both stop and look down what appears to be the deepest hole they'd ever seen, right in the ground in front of them.

"How deep is that?", one of them asks the other.

"I dunno, let's throw something down and see".

They spot a rusty old anvil a couple metres from the hole, so drag it closer to the hole and drop it in.

Even after moments, they don't hear the anvil hit the bottom.

Looking at each other in disbelief, they suddenly hear the fast thuds of an animal approaching.

Looking around, they both see a goat run past them at top speed, and dive down the hole.

"Becky! Becky!"

The two hunters see a farmer running out of the bushes and asks, "Have you guys seen a goat anywhere?"

"Yes!", the first hunter replies, "We just saw it jump down that hole!".

"But that's impossible!", the farmer replies, "I had her chained to an anvil!".

Two farmers are walking through a field...

Two farmers are walking through a field and come across a huge sinkhole in the ground.

“Wow!” says the first farmer, “I wonder how far down this thing goes.”

He takes a penny from his pocket and throws it into the sinkhole. The two farmers listen, but they never hear it hit the bottom.

The second farmer picks up a large rock off the ground and throws it into the sinkhole

Again, both farmers listen, but they never hear the rock hit the bottom.

The second farmer spies an anvil a few feet away, and together the two farmers struggle to haul the anvil over to the sinkhole. They throw it in, and listen, but it never seems to hit the bottom.

The farmers turn to leave, when all of a sudden, a goat comes speeding towards them at 30 miles an hour, and jumps straight into the sinkhole.

As they are leaving, a third farmer runs towards them, waving his hands.

“Have either of you seen a goat?” he asks frantically.

“Yes,” says the first farmer, “In fact, a goat just came galloping through the field and jumped right into that sinkhole there.”

“Impossible!” says the third farmer, “I had him tied to an anvil!”

The 100 MPH Goat

*(I live in Tennessee. No offense to rednecks everywhere else...)*

Two Tennessee rednecks are out hunting, and as they are walking along they come upon a huge hole in the ground. They approach it and are amazed by the size of it.

The first hunter says, "Wow, that's some hole; I can't even see the bottom. I wonder how deep it is."

The second hunter says, "I don't know, let's throw something down and listen and see how long it takes to hit bottom."

The first hunter says, "There's this old pickup transmission here, give me a hand and we'll throw it in and see."

So they pick it up and carry it over, and count one, and two and three, and throw it in the hole.

As they stand there listening and looking over the edge, they hear a rustling in the brush behind them.

They turn around to see a goat come crashing through the brush, run up to the hole and with no hesitation, jump in head first.

While they are standing there looking at each other, looking in the hole and trying to figure out what that was all about, an old farmer walks up.

"Say there," says the farmer, "you fellers didn't happen to see my goat around here anywhere, did you?"

The first hunter says, "Funny you should ask, but we were just standing here a minute ago and a goat came running out of the bushes doin' about a hunert miles an hour and jumped headfirst into this hole here!"

The old farmer said, "That's impossible. I had him chained to a transmission!"

A missionary staying in an African village approached by the Chief...

The Chief says,

"Holy man, my wife just gave birth to a white child. Everyone in the village is black, except for you. "

The missionary begins to sweat until he notices a herd of goats outside.

"Chief, every once in a while, God makes his creation different from the others. Look at the goat outside. All of them are white, except for the one black one."

The chief leans into the missionary's ear and whispers,

"I'll let you off the hook this time, but you keep quiet about goat, okay?"

Documentary on Afghanistan

A journalist goes to Afganistan for a documentary. In a little village he saw an old man and asked him to narrate a typical happy story of his village.
The old man smiled and began:"One day, a long time ago, my goat got lost in the mountains. As is our tradition, all the men of the village gathered to drink vodka first and then looked for the goat. When we finally found her, as is our tradition, we all drank some more vodka and all the men in the village each got their turn to mate with the goat. We had so much fun that day!"
The journalist realized that he couldn't publish such a story so he asked the old man if he had another happy story.
The old man smiled again and started all over again: "Once, my neighbor’s wife got lost in the mountains. As per our tradition, all of the village's men gathered to drink vodka and then went to look for her. As is our tradition, when we finally found her, all the men in the village got their turn to mate with the neighbor’s wife. We had great fun that day!"
The journalist couldn't publish that story either and therefore asked: "Don't you have a story that is less happy; something... umm ... sadder?"
The old man's smile faded. His eyes welled up..... In a sad, soft voice he began: "One day I got lost in the mountains.....

Two hunters are in a forest.

They come across a very deep hole and one hunter says to the other "How deep is that?" They both find a rusty anvil and throw it in. The anvil falls so far that the hunters don't hear it hit the bottom but then they see a goat sprinting past them and jump into the hole. They stand by the hole thinking about what just happened until a farmer comes along. The farmer says "Have you seen my goat Becky?" The hunters reply, "Yeah, it ran passed us and jumped into that hole." The farmer says, "That's impossible. She couldn't have done that, she was chained to an anvil."

Two hunters are tracking a deer when they stumble upon a deep hole...

They can’t see the bottom of this hole and were wanting to see how deep it went. One of the hunters found an anvil next to the hole and threw it down. They were waiting to hear the thud of the anvil hitting the ground but they didn’t hear anything. Suddenly, the hunters heard a charging sound. The hunters turned around and see a goat charging at them going at least 20 mph. They jump out of the way and barely dodge the charging goat. It fell into the hole. Walking away, somewhat distraught, they met a farmer walking around. The farmer asked if either of the hunters saw a goat around there.
One of the hunters said “ya, it charged right past me and I dodged it and the goat fell into the hole.”
“That’s weird,” said the farmer, “I tied him to an anvil.”

Two men are walking the woods.

They come across a large hole the ground, several meters across and apparently bottomless.

After examining the hole for a moment, they decide to throw something into the hole to see how long it takes for it to hit the bottom. The first man throws in a pebble, and after a long pause hears nothing. The second man throws in stone, and again nothing. The work together to roll a small boulder into the hole. They wait for a few minutes, but again, nothing. Finally, the find a large log that takes all of their combined strength to drag through the forest and onto the edge of the hole. Balancing the log at the edge of the hole, the men agree that they'll stay completely quiet for as long as it takes to hear the log hit the bottom of the hole.

They push the log in, and silently wait. Finally, they hear something.

"^^^bbbAAAA ^^AAAAA ^AAAAAA AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!"

The two men look at each other in confusion. Suddenly a goat bursts out of the underbrush, charging them full tilt and bleating at the top of its lungs. The men dodge aside, and the goat runs past them and dives straight into the hole.

"BAAAAAAAAA^AAAAAAA^AAAAAA^AAAA^AAHHH!"

Staring at each other in astonishment, the men decide it's time for them to leave. As they walk out of the woods, a farmer hails them and drives over in his tractor.

"Have you lads been in them woods? Did ya by chance see my goat while you were in there? I seem to a lost him."

"Actually," replies the first man, "we did see a goat. It ran straight past us and dove into a bottomless hole we found."

"Nah," said the farmer, "that couldn't a been him. I tied him to a log before I left."

Two guys are walking through the woods one day when they stumble across a big deep hole.

The first guy peers into it and says, "Wow! That looks deep."


The second guy says, "It sure does. Let's throw a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is. We'll be able to tell the depth by how long it is before we hear the noise of the pebbles landing."


So they pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait. Nothing. There's no noise.


The first guy says, "Jeeez. That is really deep. I know, let's throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise."


So they pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait... and wait... Again, nothing.


They look at each other in amazement. Then the first guy gets a determined look on his face and says, "Hey, over here in the weeds, there's a railroad tie. Help me carry it over. When we toss that sucker in, it's gotta make some noise."


So the two of them drag the heavy tie over to the hole and heave it in. Once again, not a sound comes from the hole.


Suddenly, out of the nearby woods, a goat appears, running like the wind. It rushes toward the two men, then right past them, running as fast as it's legs will carry it. Suddenly it leaps in the air and into the hole.


The two men are astonished with what they've just seen and look at each other in amazement.


Then, out of the woods comes a farmer who spots the men and ambles over. He asks them, "Hey, you two guys seen my goat out here?"


The first guy says, "You bet we did! Craziest thing I ever saw. It came running like crazy and just jumped into this hole and disappeared!"


"Nah", says the farmer, "That couldn't have been my goat. My goat was chained to a railroad tie."

A man, a dog, and a goat are the only survivors of a shipwreck

They end up on a deserted island. After a few weeks, the man is feeling very lonely and starts looking at the goat in a new light. One day he tries to have his way with it but the dog growls and scares him off. He goes to sleep unsatisfied.

The next day he tries again, but the dog is there, growling and threatening to attack if the man gets too close to the goat.

The man grows frustrated. One day, he sees a ship foundering off the coast. He is able to save someone from drowning. He gets them to shore and discovers it’s a beautiful woman. She comes to and says “Wow, you saved my life. I’ll do anything to thank you. *Anything.*”

The man can’t believe his luck. He looks at her and his mind reels with the possibilities.

“Would you mind holding this dog for a minute?”

Harry is taking a stroll through the woods....

...when he finds a large hole in the ground. The hole seems ridiculously deep, so Harry takes a small rock and throws it down the hole. Then he listens for the sound of the rock hitting the ground below. He doesn't hear anything, so next he tries a larger rock. Still, no sound. He looks around for something larger, and he finds an old railroad tie. He lifts up the railroad tie and chucks it down the hole. Still no sound.

Then out of NOWHERE, Harry sees a goat charging at him full speed from behind. Harry dives out of the way, then watches as the goat charges strait down the hole.

Harry is sitting there, perplexed, when a farmer approaches Harry and asks

Farmer: "Hey son, you haven't seen a goat around here have you?"

Harry: "Actually, Yes I did! It was the strangest thing, a goat just charged me full speed! I was just able to get out of the way. THEN the goat ran strait down that hole over there" as Harry points to the hole.

Farmer: "That's impossible, I tied that goat to a railroad tie"

My favorite joke since I was a kid

Two guys are walking down the side of the road in a rural area somewhere. All of a sudden, in the middle of the road, a huge hole appears. Curious, the two men peer down inside to see how deep it goes, but can't see the bottom. One saunters to the side of the road to find a pebble, throws it in, and listens; they don't hear it hit bottom. The other goes to the side to find a larger rock, throws it in, and listens; they still don't hear it hit bottom. They look at each other, and go find a log off to the side of the road, roll it in, and wait for it to hit bottom. All of a sudden, a goat runs out of the woods at high speed, and jumps down the hole. They look at each other quizzically, shrug, and keep walking. A few minutes later, an exasperated farmer steps onto the road out of the brush. He looks at the men and asks "Have either of you seen a goat around here?" The men look at the farmer and say "Yes, actually. A goat came out of the woods back there and jumped into this giant hole." The farmer replies "That couldn't have been my goat; my goat was tied to a log."

[Long] Two men are walking across a field, when they come across a very large hole in the ground. So large that they can't see the bottom of this hole. "I wonder how deep it is.", the first man says. The second man pulls out a coin, and flips it into hole. They wait and listen....

....nothing. "Wow!", they both exclaim. "Let's try something else.", says one man to the other. They spot a large rock nearby, and with a struggle, they get the rock to the hole. They roll it in, wait and listen....still nothing. " My goodness! How deep this hole must be!", says one man. " Let's try that huge log over there.", says the other. Again, with a struggle, they haul this huge log to the hole, and roll it in. As they wait and listen, and seemingly out of nowhere, a goat runs up and jumps in the hole. As they both look at each other in shock, they hear a tractor coming across the field. Shortly, a farmer arrives, and asks, " Either of you boys seen my goat?". "Yeah!", they both exclaim. "One just came by and jumped in this hole!" The farmer sits back and tells them," No, no. Couldn't have been my goat. My goat was chained to a huge log."

[long] Two guys are walking through the woods one day when they stumble across a big deep hole

The first guy peers into it and says, "Wow! That looks deep."

The second guy says, "It sure does. Let's throw a few pebbles in there and see how deep it is. We'll be able to tell the depth by how long it is before we hear the noise of the pebbles landing."

So they pick up a few pebbles and throw them in and wait. Nothing. There's no noise.

The first guy says, "Jeeez. That is really deep. I know, let's throw one of these great big rocks down there. Those should make a noise."

So they pick up a couple football-sized rocks and toss them into the hole and wait... and wait... Again, nothing.

They look at each other in amazement. Then the first guy  gets a determined look on his face and says, "Hey, over here in the weeds, there's a railroad tie. Help me carry it over. When we toss that sucker in, it's gotta make some noise."

So the two of them drag the heavy tie over to the hole and heave it in. Once again, not a sound comes from the hole.

Suddenly, out of the nearby woods, a goat appears, running like the wind. It rushes toward the two men, then right past them, running as fast as it's legs will carry it. Suddenly it leaps in the air and into the hole.

The two men are astonished with what they've just seen and look at each other in amazement.

Then, out of the woods comes a farmer who spots the men and ambles over. He asks them, "Hey, you two guys seen my goat out here?"

The first guy says, "You bet we did! Craziest thing I ever saw. It came running like crazy and just jumped into this hole and disappeared!"

"Nah", says the farmer, "That couldn't have been my goat. My goat was chained to a railroad tie."

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