Elf Jokes

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Funniest Elf Jokes

Funny Elf Jokes
Score: 499

So an elf walked into a bar... The hobbit laughed and walked under it.

Score: 138

What do you call an elf wearing earmuffs? Anything you want. He can't hear you.

Score: 67

You guys, I just drew a really cool creature - it's half moose, half elf Sorry to boast, I'm just feeling pretty proud of moose-elf.

Score: 23

Why did the elf have to play with Mega Bloks? Because he was Legoless

Score: 19

What sort of elf lives in a can? A sprite

Score: 15

When is an elf not an elf? When he’s got his head up a fairy’s skirt, then he’s a goblin.

Score: 14

An elf walks into a bar. (LOTR) The hobbit laughed and walked under it.

Score: 11

I just drew a really cool picture, it's half mouse and half elf Sorry to boast, but I'm just feeling really proud of mouse-elf

Score: 9

What do you call an elf with a personal trainer? Elfy.

Score: 8

An elf walks into a bar... The dwarf laughs and walks under it.

Score: 7

What kind of jokes would a depressed elf tell? Elf-deprecating.

Score: 7

What's the best thing about working for Santa Claus? Universal elf care.

Score: 6

An elf and a human walk into a bar... The halfling and the dwarf pass under it.

Score: 6

You've heard of Elf on a Shelf, but have you heard... Jeffrey Epstein definitely didn't kill himself.

Score: 6

I think I’m ready to declare Elf of the year already: Epstein didn’t kill hims Elf.

Score: 5

I knew a rich elf once. He was very welfy.

Score: 5

What do you get when you mix an elf and a scientologist? Elrond Hubbard!

Score: 5

Which elf was the best singer? Elfis Presley

(I’ll get my coat)

Score: 5

why was santa's little helper so depressed? he had low elf esteem!

Score: 5

Why was one of Santa's little helpers depressed? He had low elf esteem.

Score: 5

Why did the elf go to kindergarten? To learn the elf-a-bet!

I just overheard my 5yo tell this to his older brother. He made sure to add emphasis to "elf-a-bet", in case his brother didn't get it. Not sure where he heard this - it came out of the blue.

Score: 5

Ice Bank Mice Elf (repeat this 10 times fast)

Score: 4

What's the difference between cardi b and an elf? An elf can wrap.

Score: 4

Whats the Jewish version of Elf on a Shelf Mensch on a bench

Score: 4

My great uncle Chuck started the elf on a shelf tradition. Well, actually, he was a drunk on a bunk, but we toned it down for the kids.

Score: 4

Captain Crunch, Frankenberry, Count Chocula, and the Lucky Charms Elf were all murdered last night... It seems it might have been a cerial killer

Score: 4

What do you call an elf that has lost their leg? Legoless

Score: 4

The elf in the Fellowship of the Ring must not have had that great of a childhood. Since there's no plastic in Middle Earth, he was lego-less

Score: 3

Why was the elf in a wheelchair? Because he was Legolas!

Score: 3

What did the injured elf get as a late Christmas present? *New ears*

Score: 3

What do you call an Elf that sings? A wrapper!

Merry Christmas.


I hope you got what you wished for. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Score: 3

Here in about 50 years, when Harry Potter is on its 5th reboot, this time with an all house elf cast, the author will be J. K. Rowling over in her grave.

Score: 3

What did Han Solo say to the Keebler elf who complained he couldn't understand Chewbacca? Sorry friend, that's the way the Wookiee mumbles.

Score: 3

I saw a garden elf On the subway today muttering to himself click.... click.... click.... click....

He was a metro gnome.

Score: 3

Why did Santa have to close his toy factory? Elf and safety!

Score: 3

What does a diabetic elf need? Tinselin

Score: 2

What happened when a disgruntled elf picked a fight with Santa? He decked the balls.

Score: 2

Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed? Because he had low elf esteem.

Score: 2

What do you call a singing elf A wrapper

Score: 2

Did you hear Santa’s been kicking off at his workers again? He’s got mental elf problems.

Score: 2

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New Elf Jokes

What do you call it when a toy and an elf have a baby girl? Lego Lass

Score: 2

AG Sessions is a Keebler elf isolationist and he is afraid weed is making cookies too mainstream

Score: 1

What do you call an Elf who sing? A Wrapper!

Score: 1

What do you call an elf that won't shut up? Gobby.

Score: 1

What do you call an elf that sings? A wrapper.

Score: 1

What do you call one of Santa's helpers who bosses around the reindeer? Rude-elf.
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When he found out, Santa shouldn't have gotten mad, he only had his elf to blame.

Now Santa won't forgive him until elf freezes over.

Score: 1

Why was Santa sacked two days before Christmas? Elf and safety

Score: 1

The place I store my loud elf Shhh elf

Score: 1

What do you call an elf singer? Elvish Presley

Score: 1

What body regulates the welfare of Santa's workers? The Elf and Saftey Executive.

Score: 1

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