Game Of Thrones Jokes

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Funniest Game Of Thrones Jokes

What is the difference between Game of Thrones and Twitter? With Twitter you only get 140 characters.

Funny Game Of Thrones Jokes

What does The Walking Dead, Game of Thrones and Fast and Furious have in common? All their Walkers are dead

What's the difference between Game of Thrones and United Airlines? One has dragons and the other has drag-offs

Why do they run the credits at the beginning of Game of Thrones? Because you don't know who is going to make it to the end.

The ending of Game of Thrones makes sense, think about it. Arya went west, Jon went north, Drogon went east, and the show went south.

What's the difference between Twitter and Game of Thrones? Twitter only allows 140 characters.

Game of thrones spoiler!!!! Now that all the nerds aren't paying attention, party at my house this Saturday.

My crush said I'm like a brother to her Lucky she likes game of thrones

Which Game of Thrones character doesn't stink ? Bran

He is Hodorless

Why do astronomers love Game of Thrones? Because of its dwarf star.

Why was Game Of Thrones banned from twitter? Because twitter has an 140 character limit.

Why do the Lannisters have such big beds? Because they like to push two twins together to make a king.

(Game of Thrones ref)

What does Titanic, The Sixth Sense, and Game of Thrones have in common? Icy dead people.

The final episode of Game of Thrones should end in a huge musical number where everyone comes back to life for some reason and nothing is explained and no real ending is given. That'll cause riots.

What do kings call musical chairs? A game of thrones.

I wanted to read more Now I watch game of thrones with the subtitles on

What do Game of Thrones, The Walking Dead, and Spider-Man all have in common? They’re more realistic than The Bachelor.

What do beds and Game of Thrones have in common? Put 2 twins together and you get a king.

What is the most unstable and unpredictable job in the world? Casts of Game of Thrones.

The girl I liked said I was like a brother to her Lucky for me she likes game of thrones.

"Lord of the Rings" had a better ending that "Game of Thrones" I guess that's what happens when the author writes it.

If you spell Breaking Bad backwards, you will get "Dab Gnikaerb" Which still makes more sense than Game of thrones\` entire season 8

Game of Thrones: season 8 That’s it. That’s the joke.

What was the most successful love story in Game of Thrones? Shireen. She was only on Tinder for a couple of minutes.

What do 'Game of Thrones' and 'The Sixth Sense' have in common? Icy dead people

[Game of Thrones Spoiler ALL BOOKS Fan Theory] Benjen, Bran, Daario, Euron, Syrio, Jaqen, and Coldhands walk into a restaurant.. and say: "Table for one, please."

People complain about Game of Thrones having a lot of incest... ...but Bran could have broken his arms instead of his legs

Kid from The Sixth Sense asked to comment on Game Of Thrones and he described it with one sentence. "Icey dead people"

Game of Thrones is really getting out of hand... Even websites are dying in the new season.

What's red and caused horror among Game of Thrones fans? Ed Sheeran.

My buddy told me his least favourite season of Game of Thrones was season 5. Shame.

My girlfriend climaxed at the season finale of Rick and Morty She also climaxed at the finale of Iron fist.

And again at the season Finale of Game of Thrones.

She keeps coming to conclusions

Had an issue with how the latest season of Game of Thrones ended: Bit of an auntie climax don't you think?

So we wont see season 8 of Game of Thrones until 2019 They're really dragon it out

I watched all of Game of Thrones back to back with the girlfriend, Fortunately I was the one facing the TV.

What do radical feminists and Game of Thrones have in common? All men must die.

What airline does Sophie Turner use when she's filming Game of Thrones? Luftsansa

If Game of Thrones was written by M. Night Shyamalan, what would he have called the White Walkers? Icy Dead People

My friend still hasn’t seen season 8 of Game of Thrones. And every time I try to broach the subject she just yells at me, “No Spoilers!” So I gave up on trying to warn her That she shouldn’t name her baby, Khaleesi.

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New Game Of Thrones Jokes

The guy who played "The Mountain" from Game of Thrones is 50% of a Norse god. He's Hafthor.

What is the difference between Game of Thrones and the syrian civil war? One is for entertainment... and the other one is a TV-show.

Game of thrones season 8 wins an Emmy for the Best drama series That's all.

What did they name Game of Thrones' first stock exchange? Investeros

Who's the wildest knight in Game of Thrones? Ser Engeti

My friend recently subscribed to HBO and asked me if I could help him with the name of the disaster TV show he had been hearing everyone talk about at work. Apparently, it's not Game of Thrones S8.

Now that Game of Thrones is ending, you know who my dad thinks should write pirate books? George "Arrre Arrre" Martin

I'm sorry.

What do the last ten minutes of Dexter and the last season of Game of Thrones have in common? They ruin eight years of your life.

The people promoting Game of Thrones Season 8 should be paid a bonus. Because it is the best season ever :()

It's too bad my parents don't watch Game of Thrones Because then I wouldn't be the biggest disappointment in their life.

Game of Thrones Season 8. That’s the joke.

A Game of Thrones helpline launched to help distressed fans to cope with the end of the series. I imagine they're Snowed under.

Game of thrones season 8 That's it

Monty python and the Game of thrones

Game of Thrones finale That's it.

A vegan and an introvert walk into a room which one tells you what they are first? None; the person who hasn't watched "a single episode of Game of Thrones" beat them to it.

Redditers have forgotten how great Game of Thrones seasons 1-7 were But to be fair, so have Benioff and Weiss

[Spoiler] Game of Thrones spoiler ahead It's too bad that the Iron Throne was destroyed.

Good thing the new king comes with his own chair.

​

But honestly, the real joke is thinking anyone will look at this joke with a title like that.

Bran wasn't in Game of Thrones He was in Wheels of Fortune.

Season 8 of Game of Thrones That is all

Game of Thrones series finale That’s it, that’s the joke

I know who dies first in the last Game of Thrones... The legacy of a once-great show

What do Game of Thrones and Eazy E have in common? They’ve both had problems wrapping it up.

My opinion on Game of Thrones is changing every day. It Varys

Game of Thrones Season 8 it's like losing your virginity Before 'it' happens you are nervous, the first two days after it you are extremely happy and then one week later you realize how bad and strange it was.

In Game of Thrones Winter Came... And everyone left unsatisfied

Find a line in a TV show that fit that show perfectly -What is dead may never die-
Game of Thrones

You know who's the best character in the Game of Thrones show right now? It *Varys*

If a round of musical chairs were played using toilet bowls instead of chairs... would it be Game of Thrones?

Game of Thrones score update. Daenerys Targaryen has blown a 3-dragon lead.

Game Of Thrones Joke (semi-spoiler contained within) I don't know why Brianne was surprised Jamie left; she already knew he was a hands off kinda guy.

Last week was my first time watching Game of Thrones I still haven't seen an episode.

What are the spiders like in Game of Thrones? Varies.

Game of Thrones's Night King disappointed me ... He's not even able to hit the broad side of a Bran...

My friends haven't been talking to me since the day I told them I didn't watch Game of Thrones. To be completely fair they didn't do that before either.

Game Of Thrones [SPOILERS] Who killed the Night King?

No one.

Game of Thrones Themed: "Knock knock. Who's there? Arya" "Knock knock. Who's there? Arya"

"Arya who?"

"Arya gonna let me in? Winter is comin'!"

I'm a new dad ...I think this whole dad joke thing is inevitable.

Just played a round of musical chairs using toilet bowls... Game of thrones.

Best Game of Thrones ending theory An old Sam reads from his book *A Song of Ice and Fire* “and the kingdoms lived in peace from that day on. And that, kids, is how I met your mother.”

If you reuploaded an entire episode of Game of Thrones onto YouTube would it be copy wight infringement?

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Long Game Of Thrones Jokes

An improved Game of Thrones joke

Robert Baratheon, Renly Baratheon and Stannis Baratheon go into a tavern. They order ale, but when the barkeep brings them over, they each find a fly in their cups. Robert goes into rage and smashes the cup, demanding new ale. Renly takes the fly out and laughs with the barkeep about it. Stannis reaches into the cup, pulls out the fly and shouts: "Spit it out! The ale is mine - by right!"

Game of Thrones Pick up lines

Hey girl you must have given me greyscale cuz your making me hard

Are you a white walker cause your drop dead gorgeous

Girl your so hot if we were related I’d still date you

Is your name Sansa cause for you I’d get stark naked

A translated Chinese Joke

*Apologies in advance, as this joke does not translate cleanly. I had to adapt part of it so it could make sense*






A eunuch (think Varys from Game of Thrones) was wandering around town.

Back in ancient China, many high ranking jobs had castration as a requirement.
This particular eunuch was a public official, but was also extremely insecure about his condition. He would throw fits over anything perceived as an insult, and was not liked.

The official eventually came to the house of a writer. He demanded the writer tell him a story involving him, the great official. The writer knew of this eunuch's short fuse, and decided to toy with him.
He began his story after a pause: "A eunuch was riding on a horse..."


And then stopped.


After another long pause, the eunuch lost his temper and lashed out. "Why have you stopped? You clearly have not finished the story!"

The writer responded, "Well, that's the point, isn't it? It cannot *finish*. I doubt it could even start!"

What would Game of Thrones be called if it was about ice cream?

Game of Cones

If it was about sword sharpening: Game of Hones

If it was just everyone playing Go: Game of Stones

If everyone was single: Game of Alones

If it was about balls: Game of Throwns

If it was about spooky scary skeletons: Game of Bones

If everyone used UAVs to fight: Game of Drones

If everyone was a banker: Game of Loans

If it was about breakfast foods: Game of Scones

Possible Game of Thrones spoilers. Don't hate me pls.

Jon Snow was sitting in his office in Castle Black, and Sam comes in.
"Jon! The men are beginning to break apart pieces of the wall to ice their drinks! What should we do!?"
Jon ponders this development for awhile, then states, "Well let them!"
Sam is confused, but nods his head and exits the office. The next day Sam comes back in, looking flustered.
"Jon!" said Sam, "The men are drinking themselves to excess! They will be no use once the wildlings attack!"
Once again, Jon thinks about this for awhile, then states "I will allow it! Let them drink themselves silly!"
Sam, unable to believe his ears, walks sullenly out of the office.
The next day, Sam bursts into the room, shouting "Jon! Some of the men have brought in wenches from the surrounding villages! They plan on breaking their nights watch vows! What should we do!?"
Jon stares at Sam, and tells him plainly "This is alright Sam. They can do as they please."
At this point, Sam has had enough, and says to Jon "I cannot believe that you would permit such heinous acts in Castle Black! Isn't it your duty to uphold the sacred vows of the nights watch?”
"Don't you understand, Sam," started Jon, with a devilish grin on his face, "I no nothing".

The little-known charity of Peter Dinklage.

Dinklage, of *Game of Thrones* and *X-Men: Days of Future Past* fame, was troubled by the plight of other "little people" trying to find acting work in Hollywood.

He took a sizable chunk of his earnings and built a set of condos specifically sized for the short-of-stature set: Short counters, smaller steps, etc. The best part? While waiting for their big break, the aspiring actors / little people are not charged any rent whatsoever.

He calls the complex Stay Free Minipads.

I'm ashamed at the size of my TV

I admit it: I've got a tiny TV. What can I say? I inherited it. I can't just magically get a new one.

My ex-girlfriend used to say that size didn't matter, as long as we watched together. Then my friend sent her a pic after he erected his set. No friggin' shame! Next thing I know, they're hanging out. "It's only Game of Thrones," she said. But a month later, she left me, and I see a picture of her hanging off his massive 70". I unfriended both of them, but the shame still remains.

My current girlfriend says it's OK too. "You have a plasma, so the picture's so much better." But I couldn't help notice her checking out this guy standing in line next to us at CostCo. She tried not to let me see her, but I saw. She couldn't take her eyes off this guy's enormous package the whole time.

Yeah, I've tried the stuff they advertise on the net. The fact is, no matter how many lights you put behind it, the picture is still the same size. Nobody is fooled. I can't help but feel it's only time before my current girlfriend leaves me for somebody better endowed.

Think I should buy a sports car?

I pulled over to help an older man with a flat tire

I was surprised to find it was my favorite author, George R. R. Martin!

He was very grateful for my assistance. “As a reward, how about I name a character in the Game of Thrones series after you?”

“Really? I’d love that!” I responded.

“I’ll ever let you decide what happens to your character: do you want him to be disfigured, raped, tortured, or murdered?”

Mr. Martin could see the look of horror on my face and laughed.

“I’m just kidding! I wouldn’t make you choose. He’ll get all four, just like everyone else.”

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