Siri Jokes

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Funniest Siri Jokes

Funny Siri Jokes

Storm Ciara I just asked Siri "surely it's still not going to be stormy tomorrow?"

Siri replied, "yes it will be and don't call me Shirley"

Realised my phone was in Airplane mode

I asked Siri "What do women want?" My phone has not shut up for the past three days.

I asked Siri why I'm single She opened the front camera

I asked Siri " surely it isn't going to rain tomorrow" and he replied " yes it is, and don't call me Shirley"...turns out I left airplane mode on

My wife asked why I was speaking so softly at home. I told her I was afraid that Mark Zuckerberg was listening!
She laughed. I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

So my pal asked Siri why he's still single.. Siri activated the front camera

I asked Siri a question and she said, “Don’t call me Shirley.” I must have left the phone in Airplane mode.

I just asked Siri "Surely it's not going to rain today?". Siri replied "It is, and don't call me Shirley." I forgot to take my phone off airplane mode

“Siri, why am I still single?!” Siri activates the front camera.

I tried to use the password "beefstew" for my iTunes account. But Siri said it wasn't stroganoff.

Just asked Siri 'surely the weather is not going to be this miserable again tomorrow?' Siri replied, 'yes it will be and don't call me Shirley'

Forgot to take my phone off Airplane mode

I asked Siri to tell me a joke She turned the front-facing camera on

Asked my iPhone, “Surely I don’t need an umbrella today?”. Siri replied “Yes, and don’t call me Shirley”. Turns out I left Airplane mode on.

My wife said someone is listening to us. I said do you believe in ghosts?

I laughed. She laughed.

Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

I asked SIRI why I was still single. So she turned on the front camera.

My wife asked me why I spoke so softly in the house. I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening. She laughed, I laughed, Alexa laughed, Siri too.

Credit: James Franco

I just asked Siri for a wake up call... She sent a photo of me, surrounded by empty pizza boxes and beer cans.

Artificial Intelligence is really taking over our jobs, man. Just today, I asked Siri to change the tv channel, and it ended up calling my mother.


Siri has now replaced my partially deaf grandma.

My wife asked me why I was talking so quietly? I said I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening. She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri Laughed.

Siri why am I single? Turns on front camera

My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home. I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening! She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

There was a really horrible sound coming from my car, so I asked Siri to identify it. Skrillex.

You know you’ve been in quarantine long enough when.. Your Siri maps suggestion says “8 seconds to the living room!”

What is a hackers favorite pop group? The Black IP’s


Note: Siri voice to text is solely responsible for this

My wife asked me why I speak so softly while I’m at home... I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerburg was listening!

She laughed. I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

I asked Siri to tell me a joke She replied "You have no new text messages"

My girlfriend asked me why I was speaking so softly at home I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!
She laughed. I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

What four words is Siri most tired of hearing? "Hey Siri, Open Google"

Wishing a happy women’s day to Siri and Alexa .... the only two women who listen to men and do as they say!!

My father asked me why I was talking so softly at home... I told him I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!
He laughed. I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed as well.

What do you call a country made by Apple? Siri Lanka

My wife asked me why I speak so quietly at home I told her that I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening.

She laughed, Alexa laughed and Siri laughed

Siri annoyed me all morning. She kept calling me Shirley. Then I remembered I left my phone on airplane mode.

Siri call Laurel Ok. Calling Yanny.

Three SIRI are sitting on the bar. The bartender says "we don't serve your kind here."

What’s the difference between an Apple user and an android user. Say “nine hundred and eleven” to Siri for the punchline.

Hey Siri Me: Siri got any jokes for me?

Siri: *Turns on camera*

Siri is always right! Ex: I miss our time together. Do you miss me?

Me: Do you remember the time when I used to joke about ‘you’ being the top recommendation by Siri on my phone.?

Ex: Yea, that was sooooo cute! :)

Me: Siri doesn’t recommend ‘you’ now!

when siri doesn’t like you “Siri, why am I still single?!”. Siri activates front camera.

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New Siri Jokes

Can you guys explain this joke that Siri told me to me? "I thought I spilled coffee all over my keyboard, but it turns out it's all under control."

I don't get it. Please help.

Why should you never borrow Rick Astley’s complete collection of Pixar movies? He’s never gonna give you Up.

Credit: Siri

My wife asked me why I was whispering at home... I said I was worried that Mark Zuckerberg was listening, She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed. G+ laughed... We all laughed...

Scene: Me using the Siri app on my iPhone Me: Siri, call my wife.

Siri: Samantha McLaughlin is not in your contacts.

Me: Samantha Gibbs is my wife.

Siri: I’ve added Samantha Gibbs as your wife.

Me: Call my wife.

Siri: Which wife?

My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home. I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!

She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.


P.S. not originally mine, but found it too funny not to put it here.

My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home. I told her Mark Zuckerberg was listening... She laughed. I laughed. Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home... My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home.
I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!
She laughed. I laughed.
Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

>credit: Jean Marc Dieu

Siri: The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense.

I did have to ask for a joke in English, as the first time Siri said she would, but I wouldn’t understand a joke in her language.

Siri So I asked Siri what movies were playing at the local cinema.

Siri said, "Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?"

Turns out my phone was in airplane mode.

I told Siri that no one understands me. She said: "I don't know what you mean by *no one understands me*"

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Long Siri Jokes

When Siri Slips

After i-messaging back and forth with my wife, I jokingly commanded Siri to pass along this message: “You need to get back to work now; you have a husband to support.”

Here’s what Siri sent: “You need 
to get back to work now; you have 
a has-been to support.”

After i-messaging back and forth with my wife, I jokingly commanded Siri...

After i-messaging back and forth with my wife, I jokingly commanded Siri to pass along this message: “You need to get back to work now; you have a husband to support.”

Here’s what Siri sent: “You need 
to get back to work now; you have 
a has-been to support.”

I just met the best girl

I've been talking to this girl.
not only is she beautiful, she's mad cool. she's super smart and she's good with direction. Whenever we talk she always listens to what i have to say. her memory is insane, she can remember stuff we did like last week.

Her name is Siri

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