Lactose Intolerant Jokes

My new girlfriend dumped me when she found out I was missing a toe Apparently she's lactose intolerant.

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Funny Lactose Intolerant Jokes
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What did the lactose intolerant guy say after having a glass of milk? Please excuse my dairy air

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I used to date a girl who was lactose intolerant. We broke up because she couldn’t stomach my cheesy jokes.

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I sure hope Pennywise isn't lactose intolerant... He seems to eat a lot of Derry

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I had a sip of the Milky Way galaxy. It turns out I'm galactose intolerant.

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Pickup line : hello, are you lactose intolerant? Just wanted to make sure, my pickup line is very chessy. .


I used that once...she laughed...her husband laughed i walked away...true story btw

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I discriminate against people who lose digits on their feet to frostbite. I guess you could say I am lactose intolerant.

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I'm glad my wife is lactose intolerant. We don't have to pose for pictures.

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What do you call a lactose intolerant Mexican bodybuilder. No whey Jose

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TIFU by accidentally giving my girlfriend my sandwich that had extra cheese when she's lactose intolerant Whoops, wrong sub.

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I'm not doing anything cheesy for my girlfriend on valentines day... She's lactose intolerant.

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None of my friends seem to care that I'm lactose intolerant But tell them I'm racist and they all flip out.

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[OC] My best friend recently lost the front of his foot in a boating accident and now I hate him. I'm surprised by how lactose intolerant I am.

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What’s the difference between someone who can’t eat cheese, and someone who hates amputees? Ones lactose intolerant, the other is lack-toes intolerant

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My friend told me he can’t drink milk. I asked him if he is lactose intolerant. He said he is actually allergic to the milk protein. I said “No whey!”

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Why did the shopkeeper throw out the toeless man? The shopkeeper was lactose intolerant.

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When space travel is affordable I will leave the Milky Way galaxy and move to the Soy Milky Way. You could say that I'm galactose intolerant.

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The Outsiders: Why is Ponyboy lactose intolerant? He hates Dairy but likes Sodapop.

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what did the lactose intolerant man say after eating an ice cream cone? please excuse my dairy air

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Are you lactose intolerant? If so, you won't be able to handle this cheesy joke

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What did the lactose intolerant Mexican say? No whey Jose.

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What do you call an alien who can't drink milk? Galactose intolerant.

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I worked with a guy on a building site... I once worked with a guy on a building site who never wore steel toe caps. When I asked him why, he said he didn't them. Turns out he was lactose intolerant.

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I’m not racist! I’m blactose intolerant.

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Did you hear about the lactose intolerant man who ate a whole wheel of cheese? it was not gouda for him later.

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Cheese has magical properties for the lactose intolerant, we turn into Oscar Pistorious... ... and run to the bathroom in the middle of the night.

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A random stranger laughed at how I was lactose intolerant How dairy

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I have a lactose intolerant friend who sells ice cream for a living. He can’t take it, but he can dish it out.

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Just a reminder to lactose intolerant people... We live in the Milky Way Galaxy.

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