Scientology Jokes

Why did the Church of Scientology try to assassinate the non-binary feminist? Xenu too much.

Score: 12

Why doesn’t scientology have any coal workers? because sects with miners are illegal

Score: 8

I really want my own reality show on TLC. Did I mention that I am a morbidly obese little person with 18 children and I just escaped from Scientology!

Score: 4

Did you hear the one about the whistle-blower for the Church of Scientology? Nobody did. He was swiftly killed and any evidence surrounding his existence was erased from history and censored from the internet.

Score: 4

What do you get from the Book of Scientology? False Profit

Score: 3

I heard this from my Grandfather. Best. Joke. Ever. Scientology.

Score: 2

What did Darth Vader say when the Church of Scientology website got hacked? "I find your hack of faith disturbing."

Score: 2

Why is Scientology often brought up when talking about quack religions? It's a cult classic

Not sure if this has been told before

Score: 2

Who created Scientology in Middle-Earth? Elrond Hubbard

Score: 2

People often complain and belittle alternative religious organizations like atheism and scientology... but at least atheism is a non-prophet organization.

Score: 1

So I heard Russia banned Scientology... I guess they're not Putin up with that.

Score: 1

The Church of Scientology is suing an innocent time traveler. All he said was that he'd see them last Tuesday.

Score: 1

Did you know that the mascot of scientology is a horse? Because it's a colt.

Score: 1

What do you get if you cross the head of scientology with divorce papers? Buried in the basement of scientology HQ for the past 10 years.

Score: 1

The Church of Scientology does many mission trips. I mean heck, Tom Cruise has been on 5 missions already!

Score: 1

Did you know that humans have actually created humanoid robots in 1954? They called their invention, "Scientology."

Score: 1

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