I met a drunk ventriloquist who said she wanted to sleep with me... I didn't know whether it was her or the beer talking...
I went to see a topless ventriloquist last night. She was amazing, I never saw her lips moving once.
A Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a pub. The Scotsman says "round of drinks for everyone on me." The next day's newspaper headline read: "Irish ventriloquist found beaten to death behind pub."
I was at Christmas dinner with my family and I asked my Grandfather what he does for a living... My Mother replied, "I'm a ventriloquist."
I went to see a Topless Ventriloquist last weekend. She was awesome. I didn't see her lips move once.
[On a date] Date: So what do you do?
Me: I'm a taxidermist
Date: Oh... wow.
Fox: And a ventriloquist
What's the best way to freak out your gynecologist? Become a ventriloquist
I was watching this topless female ventriloquist She was brilliant, I never saw her lips move.
My uncle was a ventriloquist dummy. He died drinking furniture polish. It was a slow death but a beautiful finish.
I put my ear to the bedroom door and heard my wife moaning and a male grunting. I never knew she was a ventriloquist.
A ventriloquist walks into a bar...
He walks up to the barman and says 'Hey, I'm a ventriloquist'
Barman: Oh yeah? Are you any good?
Barman: I'm the best
I've never felt more like a dummy ... Than when I found out my proctologist is also a ventriloquist.
Ventriloquist: I am a ventriloquist.
Me: You any Good?
Me: The Best
Me: WTF?
My ventriloquist dummy said he hates having his life led by someone else. I said, "Speak for yourself."
I went to a nightclub the other evening and saw a topless ventriloquist. She was really good. I never saw her lips move.
Heard my ex was dating a ventriloquist. She always loved dummys.
I've never felt more like a dummy Than the day I found out my proctologist is also a ventriloquist.
An Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub
Suddenly the Scotsman shouts "A round for everyone on me"
The headline the next day read "Irish ventriloquist found beaten to death behind behind pub"
Did you hear about the case of the schizophrenic ventriloquist? Everyone *around* him heard voices.
How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By becoming a ventriloquist!
Why is it tough for a Karen to become a Ventriloquist? They don't wear masks!
A Scotsman and an Irish man walk into a bar
And the Scotsman shouts "All the drinks are on me!"
The next morning the headlines read *"Irish Ventriloquist Found Dead Behind Bar"*
Q: How does a woman scare a gynecologist? A: By becoming a ventriloquist!
Everyone has a talent
How does a woman scare a gynecologist?
By becoming a ventriloquist.
You know my uncle was a ventriloquist dummy, he drank some furniture polish. He had a slow death, but a beautiful finish.