Bae Jokes

What do you call a terrorist's girlfriend? A Guantanamo Bae


Thought of this one earlier and just had to share

Score: 876

What's the difference between a female farmer and Hitler's girlfriend? One bails her hay and the other heils her bae

Score: 611

What's the difference between a cold dessert and an injured girlfriend? One is ice cream and the other is a sore bae.

Score: 67

My girlfriend's best friend had her arm stuck in the dirt this morning She asked me how to get her hand out quickly.

I told her, "Dig south for her arm, bae."

Score: 47

A young muslim couple go out hunting and shoot a monkey The woman asks, "Shall we eat him?"

The man replies, "No, that's haram, bae!"

Score: 28
Funny Bae Jokes
Score: 23

My gf asked me if gorilla meat was forbidden in Islam My gf asked me if gorilla meat was forbidden in Islam.

I told her, "Yeah, it's haram, bae."

Score: 18

What does a Muslim meme lord call his naughty girlfriend? Haram bae.

Score: 14

Took my girlfriend to the ice cream factory and she fell into the gelato machine She's a sore bae now.

Score: 12

What do you call a hot indian girl? Bomb bae

Score: 12

So, the Muslim word for sin is haram... ... does that mean a Muslim's sinful girlfriend would be called a... Haram bae?


I'll see myself out.

Score: 11

What do you call your significant other's knives? Bae blades.

Score: 11

My girlfriend complained about my obsession with spices. So I said, "Bae, leave."

Score: 10

My girlfriend used to work at an American prison in Cuba. She’s my Guantanamo Bae.

Score: 10

a muslim couple goes hunting and accidentally shot an ape. "ouch, that's a shame. can we eat him so he wouldn't die in vain?" said the girl. "no, we cant" the guy replied. "why?" "it's Haram, Bae"

Score: 9

I'm making a movie about a guy who thinks his girlfriend is cheating on him, so he secretly followers her around to keep an eye on her. It's called "Bae Watch".

Score: 8

I offered my Muslim girlfriend a bite of my gorilla sandwich but she shook her head and said... "That's haram, bae."

Score: 8

What is an emo girlfriend's favorite toy? A bae-blade

Score: 7

I'm from the friendzone originally But now I live in the bae area.

Score: 6

A Muslim guy's girlfriend was killed for eating pork RIP Haram bae

Score: 6

I married a cuban girl Shes my guantanamo bae

Score: 6

What was Beethoven's girlfriend's name? Bae-thoven.

I'll^see^myself^out.

Score: 5

So I got myself a Cuban girlfriend... She is my Guantanamo bae.

Score: 5

If we're dating and you call me bae, boo or daddy... I'm walking out on you like, well, your daddy.

Score: 5

I want to create a VR girl/boyfriend simulator for those alone on Valentines Day... I shall call it, E-Bae

Score: 5

What is another name for a significant other you meet online? e-Bae

Score: 5

A muslim and his wife are chatting during dinner Wife: Did you hear about the gorilla that got shot in the zoo?
Husband: Wait what are you eating?
Wife: Pork
Husband: Thats haram bae.
Wife: Oh so you did hear about it

Score: 4

What do you call an attractive primate corpse in Saudi Arabia? Haram bae

Score: 4

What did Miss Piggy become when Kermit converted to Islam? Haram-Bae

Score: 4

Is any word in English more annoying than "bae"? Maybae not.

Score: 4

What did the muslim guy say to his girlfriend when she was about to eat gorilla meat? "That's haram, bae."

Score: 4

Are you aware the the Quran specifically forbids dating Gorillas? It turns out you're not supposed to have a Haram Bae.

Score: 3

Where do black women go to meet their boos? The bae area.

Score: 2

How did the sheep call his girlfriend? Bae Bae.

Score: 2

I fell in love with my captor while being tortured in the US. She was my Guantanamo Bae.

Score: 2

What seasoning does a widowed cannibal use? Old Bae

Score: 2

If you break up with your girlfriend from Maryland Is she your Old Bae?

Score: 1

What do you call a Significant Other that lives in San Francisco? A Bay-Bae

Score: 1

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