Who's guilty here?
A wife is dreaming while asleep in the bed, she suddenly wakes up and shouts, "quick, my husband is home!"
Her husband wakes up and jumps out the window!
What's Luigi's favorite dish at a seafood restaurant?
It's a Cala-Mario!
I thought of this joke while I was dreaming one night and laughed myself awake.
A wife was dreaming... Suddenly she wakes up and yells "Quick get out my husband's home!" her husband hurriedly wakes up and jumps out the window.
What is Donald Trump's favorite Christmas song? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
I got into lucid dreaming recently its everything I imagined it to be.
Last night I was dreaming...
So last night I was dreaming that I was writing *The Hobbit* and *The Lord of the Rings* books but my wife complained that I was very loud and disturbed her sleep.
Apparently I was tolkien in my sleep.
I barely slept last night; I kept dreaming about mufflers. I'm exhausted.
I've been staring at topless models all day, just dreaming But sadly, I can't afford the diecast convertible cars at the moment
A man goes in to talk to his psychologist. A man says to his psychologist, "I keep dreaming that I'm a sadistic, necrophiliac zoophile. Should I be worried, or am I just beating a dead horse?"
What's Donald Trump's favorite Christmas song? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas ♫
I’m so good at lucid dreaming I can do it in my sleep
What is the favorite Christmas Carol of the Aryan brotherhood? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.
Last night I woke up in the middle of dreaming about the meaning of life. It was very eye opening.
Stop dreaming about pizza delivery by drone. It's a pie-in-the-sky idea.
I wish lucid dreaming was more controllable Not the duration of lucid dreaming but the destinations I visit. I’m tired of going to McDonalds at 2am
I had a dream I was dreaming...
Woke up to find I wasn't dreaming.
This may be bad but at least you're happy with your life.
7 One night I was dreaming the number 7, over an over. To my amazement, when I woke up it was 7 o'clock, on July the 7th. So I took the bus on line 7 straight to the racetrack and bet 7777$ on the 7th horse from the 7th round. It finished on 7th.
Everyone was dreaming of working for Steve Jobs except his pancreas
Donald Trump went to sleep. He was dreaming and he saw Abraham Lincoln. He asked him what is the best way for him to serve the country. Abraham Lincoln then said "go see a play".
I ate a load of of licorice at bedtime and had some very strange nightmares.
What were you dreaming about?
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All sorts.
A woman goes to her doctor complaining of strange dreams. "I keep dreaming that I'm peeing on nickels, dimes, and quarters," she tells him. He runs some tests and then tells her that everything's fine, that she's just going through her change.
What's Nigel Farage's favourite Christmas song? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.
If a dog tells you you're dreaming... believe him.
What Christmas carol will Donald Trump be singing all month? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
You know what every Asian is dreaming about? 30ms ping
I finally have life of my dreams... Nothings changed, I’ve just started dreaming about being miserable
I'm so good at dreaming I can do it in my sleep
dreaming So a person goes to a psychiatrist and tells the guy this: I keep dreaming that I'm either a wigwam or a teepee and it won't stop. so the psychiatrist says that he should relax because he is two tents.
Quarantine is feeling more and more like highschool in the 00's We’re all day dreaming about how to get out of the house, no one has any standards around booz consumption, and emo culture is at an all time high.