Grown Up Jokes

Funny Grown Up Jokes
Score: 24

I saw my uncle on Tinder Obviously I swiped left. He's not going to be in to me now that I'm all grown up.

Score: 17

Little Johnny told his parent "I'm a grown up now, I am ready to live by myself" His parent, being very proud of their son, said "Well that's great! We have no reason to stop you"

To which he replied "Awesome! Your luggage is at the front door"

Score: 16

Dark humor is a lot like cancer Grown ups mainly get it but sometimes kids get it too.

Score: 9

How do you know that you have grown up? You are walking in the road and the priests don't even see you

Score: 8

In Germany the grown ups are kind... ...but the children are kinder.

Score: 4

Unshakable Fact # 1 A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing them.

Score: 3

Name one truth you've learnt after growing up Grown ups are good at lying

Score: 3

What do you call a hillbilly after he is all grown up? A mountain goat of course!

Score: 2

It tells you something about a school system When grown up people need days to count some paper slips.

Score: 2

What do you call a manager that hasn't grown up yet? A kidager

Score: 1

How do you know when Indian men grown up? When they take out their diapers and wrap it around their head

Score: 1

When is a girl "grown up" When she starts wearing a bra

When is a guy grown up?

When he starts unhooking the bra

Score: 1

Kids these days are way more grown up at an early age then when I was a kid. What we need is a way to... Youthenize them.

Score: 1

A dad came to meet his son at his job and gets all emotional Dad: I can't believe you're all grown up now. It's like just yesterday when you used to sit with that stupid computer game thingy all day

Son: Dad, I still work as a VFX designer

Score: 0

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