Did you hear about the guy they found dead at the Mediterranean restaurant? Yeah, police are calling it a hummus-cide.
Eating Hummus with my co-workers and I asked
Hey, what's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean?
... I've never paid $300 to have a garbanzo bean on my face.
I was taking a dip in the local pool, and the lifeguard said "Hey! What have you got"? "Hummus".
What do a pregnancy test and hummus have in common? They both require chickpea.
Did you hear about the chick pea who released a autobiography 3 years after his death? It was released post-hummus-ly
How much hummus did the anorexic girl order? A tahini bit.
You can't sing with a mouthful of chickpeas so hummus a tune.
Have you guys heard about the police investigation into the death of a chickpea? It was a hummus-ide.
How is hummus like a golden shower? They're both made of chickpea.
What do you call a murder in the middle east? A hummus-cide
Why was the Chickpea in Prison? He committed Hummus-ide
What’s in common between a chair and a table?
They are both not hummus
A friend told me this joke and I almost died...
Greek Easter is a week later to give them time to prepare all the food. Most people consider it a crucifixion, to Greeks it’s just another hummus side.
Why does Donald Trump like hummus so much? It's made with chick pee.
My girlfriend spilt hummus all over her... Can't believe that chick pea'd herself
Today I had a second helping of hummus. I was arrested for double hummus-ide.
Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat Two sides of hummus decided to go out to eat. Once they finished eating, they said, "chickpeas!"
Did you hear about the Middle Eastern chef who died while working on his cookbook? It will be released post-hummus....
Militant vegans are like militant Muslims with only one major difference. It’s all about the hummus rather than the Hamas.
What's the difference between Hummus and Humus? "mmmm"
Due to unusually successful harvests of chickpeas this year, the price of hummus is going to fall dramatically. Buy the dip.
My ex girlfriend tried to steal my hummus once. Told that chick peace.
A man was found dead at a Sabra factory The authorities later found out it was a hummus-ide
Two Jews are eating in a cafe... One looks up at the other and says "this hummus Israeli good"
What do watersports and hummus have in common? Chickpeas
If you want to make good hummus, you need to know the difference between a lentil and a chickpea... The difference is that the President never paid to have a lentil on his bed.
I misunderstood what I was applying for and ended up at a quality control factory for hummus. Not what I meant when I said I would "enjoy watching a chickpea."
i always manage to locate the best chickpeas, wherever i go... my friends often tell me ive a great sense of hummus.
Where did Vegans come from? Hummus Sapiens